Heartache and Desperation  Revised
by Mertz
Summary: The desperation a voltron character goes through when her feelings aren't immediately recipocated.  Rated M for language and sexual content.
1. Chapter 1

Welcome to the revised version of Heartache and Desperation. I always used to think of revised versions of a story as a cop out for a writer who has run out of new ideas. However, I've learned a few things since then, including that sometimes when you write a story as you are first learning to write, you don't do it justice. That is why I decided to revise this story.

Heartache was always one of my favorites of my stories, but I got to the point that I couldn't stand to read the original. When I was first writing, I didn't remember anything I had learned about grammar in school/college, didn't know much about plotting, character development, etc. With each story I've written over the last few years, I've learned a little more about writing. While I've come a long way from my first story, I know I still have more to learn. This revision shows what I've learned so far. It is also the reason why I chose not to take down the original and simply post this over the top of the old one. If you as the reader decide you want to see the difference between the two, the old version is still up for comparison.

While I stayed true to the original story, there are about forty extra pages of new and extended scenes. This story won't go through my normal editing processes, so hope to post a new chapter every couple of days.

Enjoy, Mertz

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 1

It is a warm summer day on Arus as the Voltron Force works on rebuilding a school in one of the local villages. Princess Allura sits with her back against a tree as she reads stories to the local children while the men work. She looks up from time to time, admiring the bare chest of the Captain of the Voltron Force as he lifts beams, holding them while one of the others nails it into place. Allura cannot help admiring the sweat-slick muscles on his back as they move while he works. Shaking her head slightly when she feels her body start to react, Allura looks back down at the smiling faces of the children around her and continues the story.

The team breaks for lunch when several women from the village bring various baskets full of food for them to enjoy. Keith pulls on a t-shirt before joining the others. Sitting on the ground in the shade, he tries to cool off. He looks up as a beautiful woman with long, light brown hair and green eyes, approaches him to hand him a glass of lemonade. He smiles up his thanks, looking deeply into her eyes as a pretty, pink blush appears on her cheeks.

Turning around before he can speak with her, the woman walks away. Keith watches her leave, admiring her form. Sitting next to a different tree, Lance looks at his captain then follows his gaze and smiles. He moves to Keith's location and sits beside him, wryly asking, "Enjoying the view?"

Keith rolls his eyes at his friend then turns his gaze to check on the princess' location. The lieutenant shakes his head at him, "The princess is fine. She's spent the whole morning with the children. Why don't you go talk to that gorgeous woman you were watching?"

Ignoring him, the commander continues to look around the area, only stopping when he hears Lance make a noise. "What?" he asks, turning his head back around to face him. He finds Lance staring at a stunning raven-haired woman, who is speaking to another woman. Smiling, he sarcastically says, "Why don't you follow your own advice?"

Lance finally looks back at him and smiles wickedly, "Don't mind if I do…" then gets up to walk over to the woman, who smiles at him as he approaches.

Chuckling, Keith suddenly stops when he notices the woman from before approaching him with a plate of food. He thanks her then asks her to sit beside him, "What's your name?"

She smiles shyly as she lowers herself to the ground and replies "Beth."

From across the way, Allura shares her lunch period with the children, laughing at them as they tell her stories. She glances around the area to find Lance flirting with one of the village women. Moving along, she watches Hunk and Pidge eating while another group of children sits around them, vying for their attention. Her smile grows until her gaze reaches the commander, finding him sitting with someone. She watches the woman lean forward to place a hand on his arm as they laugh together about something. The smile on her face fades as she notices the expression on Keith's face.

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The next afternoon, Allura enters the rec room to find only Hunk and Pidge in attendance, playing a game of chess. She looks around curiously, "Where are Keith and Lance?"

Hunk looks up, a sly smile on his face, "On dates…"

Her brow furrows in confusion, "Dates?"

Pidge looks up from the game, smiling as well, "Yes, they both scored dates with those pretty women they were speaking to yesterday. Keith took Beth out on a horseback ride and Lance grabbed a picnic basket from the kitchen for his date with Christine."

The bigger man chuckles, "Only those two would find dates after spending a day working like we did yesterday."

Both men continue to laugh and make comments. Neither man notices Allura's pale face or the fact that she did not join in. Instead, she quietly turns around and leaves the room.

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At breakfast the next morning, Allura sits quietly as Hunk and Pidge try to wring information out of Keith and Lance about their dates. Strangely, neither man was inclined to talk about it. Lance finally laughs at the other two, "You will have to go find your own dates instead of living vicariously through me, guys. I'm not talking!"

"Oh come on, Lance!" protests Hunk, "You used to love to lord your conquests over us! Since when have you adopted a 'no kiss and tell' policy?"

Smiling mysteriously, the lieutenant quietly replies, "When the woman in question matters."

Before they can interrogate him any further, Keith rises from his chair, "I'll see you guys at dinner. I've got work to do then I'll be out this afternoon."

"Where are you…" starts Pidge, but the commander ignores him as he walks out of the room without another word.

From his seat, Lance smiles at his friend's ability to deal with nosy teammates. Picking up his coffee cup, he glances down the table at the princess. Noticing for the first time that she seems rather pale and quiet as she picks at her meal without eating it, he asks, "Everything all right, Princess?"

Startled, she looks down the table at him. Her cheeks redden slightly as she answers, "I'm fine."

Arching an eyebrow at the obvious lie, he's about to call her on it when she stands suddenly as well while announcing, "I better get to my office. I'll see you all later."

Shaking his head at her, Lance turns his attention back to his meal and the conversations of his remaining companions.

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Two hours later, Allura stares at the pages on her desk without really seeing it. The thoughts running through her mind have nothing to do with the document in front of her. She looks up instantly when there is a knock at her door and calls out, "Yes?" while brushing the loose tendrils away from her face.

The door opens to reveal the commander. He smiles at her as he walks into the room then places a sheaf of paper in front of her, "Here's the report on the new security measures for the castle." He settles into the chair in front of the desk as he adds, "If you could look it over quick and sign off on it, I'll get Lance moving on the changes today."

Forcing her mind to concentrate on the document, Allura quickly reads it then sets it back down on her desk. She looks back at the commander, "You're sure of this?"

Keith nods to her, "Yes, changing the security perimeter is a necessity. Even though it borders the cliffs, that south wall is vulnerable to attack and I think Doom knows it. This will reinforce that area with more weaponry and guards in event of attack."

"Very well," she replies then picks up her pen to sign the document.

Standing, Keith holds his hand out for the signed papers. Troubled by it since they normally sit and talk for a while each morning, Allura hands it up to him as she asks, "Are you in a hurry?"

He flushes as he apologizes, "Yes, sorry. I have to get this to Coran and Lance then finish up a couple of other things before my date this afternoon with Beth."

Allura looks away from him, as everything inside her seems to freeze. She finally looks back, takes a deep breath and begins, "Keith, I need to…" only for the door to her office to open and her advisor to walk into the room without invitation.

"Coran, great!" exclaims the commander as the older man walks across the room to join them. He hands him the newly signed orders, "I need you to get these orders out to the men to begin working on. I'll alert Lance that he will be in charge of overseeing the project."

Taking the papers from him, Coran looks them over, notes Allura's signature then nods in agreement, "Very well."

The commander begins for the door then pauses as he remembers the princess had started to say something to him before Coran had arrived. Chagrined, he looks back at her, "I'm sorry…you were saying you needed something?"

Glancing quickly at her advisor, Allura shakes her head, "No, it can wait."

"All right, I'll see you later then," replies Keith then he quickly walks out of the room.

Shaking his head at him, Coran mutters, "Youth…" then turns his attention to the princess. Her eyes seem slightly watery. Concerned, he asks, "Is something wrong?"

The princess seems to startle, as if forgetting that the advisor had still been in the room. She nods to him, "Yes, I'm fine." Wiping at her eyes, she adds, "I've been reading all morning and my eyes are tired from it." Finished, she manages to smile up at him, "What did you need, Coran?"

Accepting her answer, Coran sits down on the chair in front of her desk and begins their discussion.

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Moving quickly down the hall, Keith makes his way to Lance's office and knocks on the door. He enters without waiting for a summons to find the lieutenant at the desk writing something. Startled, he flips the sheet of paper over quickly as he asks, "What's up Keith?"

"Allura signed off on those changes we need to the south wall. I need you to get the engineers started on building the new ion cannons. We will also need the builders to start moving walls so we can get the equipment placed as soon as it's ready."

Sighing, Lance nods, "I don't suppose this is something that can wait till tomorrow morning?"

Arching an eyebrow at him, the commander retorts, "You know better than that. The south wall has always been a weak point…"

"…and it needs to be reinforced, I know," sighs Lance with a grimace. His expression turns into a disappointed one, "I was supposed to meet Christine this afternoon for a while is all. Guess I'll have to reschedule."

Smiling, Keith suggests, "Well, if you get the workers started at least, I think you will still have time for your date." He glances at his watch, "Speaking of which, if I want to be on time for my own date, I need to get back to my office and finish my own work."

"I take it your date yesterday went as well as my own then?" asks Lance with an answering smile.

He considers not answering at first. Keith has never been one to talk about the women he has dated. However, he smiles as he replies, "Yes. We seem to have quite a bit in common and I enjoyed my time with her yesterday enough to warrant a second date today."

Lance smiles as well, "I'm glad, maybe you'll be more understanding when I say I want to spend as much of my free time as possible with Christine."

Laughter erupts out of the commander, "As long as the work still gets done, I promise not to say a word about it. I have a feeling a certain lady will be using up all my free time as well."

"We're a couple of lucky guys…aren't we?" smiles Lance as he stands up. "I better get that project moving then. I have to pick up Christine in an hour and a half."

Smiling, Keith follows him out of the office then quickly makes his way back to his own office. He had even less time than Lance to finish his work before picking up his date for the afternoon.

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One month later:

Walking down the hallway with a determined gait, Coran pauses in front of the office door of the commander. Knocking, he enters when bidden to find Keith clearing the paperwork off his desk. He stops when he notices the advisor, "Need something Coran?"

"Yes, you could say that," replies the older man. He moves farther into the room, stopping in front of the desk, "Going somewhere?"

Flushing, Keith finishes putting a file into a drawer as he replies, "Yes, I need to pick up Beth in fifteen minutes and I'm already running late."

Sitting down on the chair in front of the desk, Coran says, "Commander, if I might make a suggestion?"

Noticing the irritated expression on the advisor's face, Keith sits down as well, "Yes?"

"One can't help to notice all the time you've and the lieutenant have been spending away from the castle. If I've noticed it, I'm sure the spies for Doom have noticed it as well," begins Coran with a controlled tone.

Keeping his tone neutral, Keith inquires, "What do you suggest? That I stop dating Beth?" His eyes harden slightly as he becomes angry, "It isn't going to happen…"

"Not at all, Commander," answer Coran as he crosses his arms in front of him. "You and the other members of the Force are single men and can spend time with whomever you like. However, I do suggest that instead of being away from the castle so much, perhaps your dates should come here. That way, you and Lance would be more readily available in the event of an emergency."

Sighing deeply, Keith relaxes back into his chair as he thinks. He had been gone most afternoons or evenings in the last month, the man had a point. Looking back at him, Keith finally nods, "I'll speak with Lance about it before I leave and will make arrangements for Beth to come visit me here in the future."

"Very good," answers the advisor as he stands up. He smiles at the younger man, "I wish you and Lance the best in your endeavors."

Glancing at the clock on his wall to discover there is no way he would be on time for his date, Keith cringes. He starts for the door to his office, time to go find Lance and hope to dear God that he can find some flowers along the path to the village. He is going to need some kind of help to apologize for his lateness.


	2. Chapter 2

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 2

Sharing an excited look with Christine the next afternoon, Beth looks back out the window of the carriage at the approaching castle. She had been excited when Keith said that they would have to start spending time together at the castle. His absence of late had been far too noticeable and could pose a danger in event of attack. Her eyes move up the towering walls of the castle and her excitement heightens. Not only is she dating the Commander of the Voltron Force, the most desirable single man on the planet, now she will regularly get to dine at the castle with all the Force members and the Princess of Arus. Her friends had been extremely envious when she had told them about it.

As they cross the drawbridge, she turns back to Christine, "Isn't this fabulous? Dinner at the palace?"

Christine smiles at her friend, "Yes, though, I think Lance was a little disappointed that we need to start coming to the castle instead of him coming to visit me. He mentioned there isn't much for privacy there."

A snide smile crosses her face as Beth asks, "What do you need privacy for?"

Feeling her cheeks reddening, Christine angrily retorts, "Not what you're thinking. Lance has been nothing but a gentleman with me."

Heaving a disappointed sigh, Beth laments, "Keith is the same way. We were seeing each other for a week before he would hold my hand. It took three weeks before he would kiss my cheek!" She shares a conspirator's smile with her friend, "I've been hinting to him that I wouldn't mind doing more, but so far he hasn't taken it." A dramatic sigh escapes her, "Perhaps I'll have to make the first move…"

"You wouldn't!" exclaims Christine, completely shocked.

"Why ever not?" asks Beth as she crosses her arms over her chest. "He's a handsome man and it isn't like the old days. My father has no say in my life, I'm an adult. I can do as I wish."

Before she can say anything more, the carriage comes to a stop. The door opens to reveal a smiling Lance, "Good evening, fair ladies. Welcome to the Castle of Lions."

Finding herself returning the smile then laughing as he finishes with a gallant bow, Christine replies, "Good evening, Lance."

Returning to an upright position, he reaches out a hand to help her disembark. "Hope the ride wasn't too long?"

"No, it wasn't," she answers as she steps down from the carriage, her cheeks reddening when he places a kiss on the back of her hand before releasing it.

"Where is Keith?"

Beth's question forces Lance to return his attention to her. He holds out his hand to her as well, "He sends his apologies, last minute meeting with the princess and Coran. He asked me to escort you to the dining room and he will meet us there."

Disappointed by the news, Beth manages a stiff nod then takes his pro-offered arm. She waits until he offers the other to Christine, and then the three of them begin walking into the castle.

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Controlling his impatience as he glances at the clock, Keith interrupts the advisor's tirade, "Coran, can't this wait until tomorrow? Dinner will be served in a few minutes and I would like to be on time to dine with my girlfriend."

He misses the emotion that travels across the princess' face as the advisor glances at his watch then sighs, "I suppose it can."

"We have guests for dinner?"

Keith looks over at the princess, to find a curious look in her eyes. He answers, "Yes, sorry…I forgot to tell you. Coran suggested we have Beth and Christine visit us here instead of being gone from the castle so much, so they came for dinner tonight."

"Oh…"

Standing without waiting for the other two, Keith excuses himself, "I better get to Beth. Let's continue this discussion in the morning," then walks out the door.

Coran stands as well, "I suppose, we had best go greet our guests."

"Can you have Nanny bring me a dinner tray?" The princess picks up a sheaf of papers and begins to look at them as she finishes, "I have too much work to do."

Staring down at her confused, the advisor replies, "I can, but Princess, we have guests. Surely the work can wait until tomorrow so that we may greet Keith and Lance's friends properly?"

"No one told me we would have guests for dinner and I'd already planned to keep working. Give my regrets if you please," answers Allura as she picks up a pen and begins writing, "I'm behind in answering the Council's economic proposals."

"Very well," replies Coran. He moves across the room to leave, but glances back at the young woman working behind the desk once more before he walks out of the room.

Allura waits until the door closes before she drops the pen and sits back in her chair. Her hands move to cover her face as she tries to stifle the tears that almost escaped her before Coran had taken his leave.

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In the dining room, Beth listens to the conversation around her with half an ear as she keeps glancing at the door, waiting for Keith to arrive. She feels a hand on her arm and looks over suddenly to find Christine smiling at her. Lance clears his throat then tries to reassure her, "I'm sure Keith will be here as soon as he can." Leaning past his girlfriend, he whispers conspiratorially, "I think Coran likes to listen to the sound of his own voice sometimes…"

She manages a smile then looks over again when she hears someone's arrival. Keith enters the room, an apologetic smile on his face as he walks over to her then kisses her on the cheek, "I'm sorry. I didn't think that meeting would go on as long as it did."

"Did you guys figure out how to resolve the problem?" asks Lance, a humorous look in his eyes.

Giving him a dirty look, Keith retorts, "No. I called an end to the meeting so we could have dinner on time. We can work on it tomorrow."

"You wouldn't have had to do that," says Beth quietly, "I would have understood…"

Keith turns his attention back to his girlfriend, "It wasn't anything that couldn't wait." He reaches up to caress her cheek, "This is more important."

His hand drops away at her blush then he gestures around to the other men, "I'm guessing Lance introduced you to Hunk and Pidge."

"Yes," answers Beth with a smile as she glances at the other men. Both smile back at her then her attention moves to the door as another person arrives. She does not recognize the older man as he gestures to the table, "Please be seated so that dinner may be served."

She glances to her side as Keith leads her toward him, "Beth, this is Coran. He is Princess Allura's advisor."

"Pleased to meet you," answers the advisor with a bow.

Keith looks toward the door then asks, "Where is Princess Allura?"

"She sends her regrets that she cannot dine with us tonight, too much work to finish I'm afraid," he answers then Coran again gestures to the table so that they sit down.

As they sit down to eat, Beth shares a disappointed look with Christine. They had both been looking forward to dining with the princess. She feels her hand being squeezed. Looking to the side at the commander, Beth finds him smiling at her, "It's my fault. I forgot to warn her in advance. It isn't the first, nor will it be the last, dinner skipped in the name of work."

Nodding to him, Beth begins eating her dinner as the conversation around the table begins. She can't help inwardly fuming a little though. The princess' absence felt like an insult. _'She could have at least come long enough to say hello…'_ she thinks to herself with a sniff. Trying to push the hurt feelings away, Beth smiles at Keith then engages him in conversation.

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After dinner, Keith holds Beth's hand tightly as he walks her back toward the carriage. He glances behind him to find Lance and Christine also holding hands while they walk, their heads close together as they talk quietly. The soft smile playing on Christine's lips as Lance dips his head to kiss her quick is endearing. Turning his attention back to his own date, Keith smiles down at her as he asks, "Did you have a good time tonight?"

"Yes," she answers softly while returning the smile. It slips a moment later, "It really was too bad the princess couldn't join us. I was looking forward to meeting her."

"I'm sure she will join us next time." Keith sighs then uses his finger to lightly touch her nose affectionately, "I'm glad you came tonight."

"I'm glad you invited me," Beth whispers back then grabs his hand to lower it, kissing his fingertips.

Keith wraps his arm around her shoulders as he finishes leading the way to the carriage. He stops next to it then glances back to find Lance and Christine had stopped behind it, just out of sight. After making sure the driver of the carriage is facing forward, he turns back to his girlfriend and pulls her into his arms. His lips find hers briefly then he pulls back to smile, "We better get you home."

Her eyes search his as she replies, "I could stay with you tonight."

Freezing, he studies her closely for a moment then answers, "No, it isn't appropriate."

Beth glances around the castle, noticing the guards moving around as she responds, "No, I suppose it isn't. Too many people would notice." Turning back to Keith, she smiles as she suggests, "You could stay with me instead."

"No…" he sighs then pulls her into his arms for a hug, "There's no need to rush this. We aren't ready for that."

He can feel her fingers digging into the back of his jacket as she murmurs, "But I want to be with you."

Pulling back, Keith smiles at her, "And when we are ready...you will be."

She sighs then nods to him, disappointment clearly visible in her eyes. He leans forward to kiss her once more then calls out, "Lance…let's go," before helping her up into the carriage. The other couple appears a moment later, Christine blushing prettily as she sits down on the seat across from them before Lance sits down next to her. After Lance pulls the door closed, Keith knocks on the roof of the carriage. As it begins rumbling across the drawbridge, Keith settles back against the cushion, pulling Beth into his arms for the duration of the ride.

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Two weeks later:

Arriving back at the castle, Keith leaves his horse with the stable lad then heads into the interior, having taken Beth home after another dinner. Irritation burns through him as he quickly moves to the upper levels. Reaching Allura's office, he enters without knocking to find her seated at her desk, a partially eaten dinner tray off to the side. Her startled gaze looks up at him as he stops in front of her to demand, "Do you have a problem with members of the team dating?"

"N…no," she quietly stutters while trying to maintain eye contact, her fingers digging into the armrest of her chair.

"Then why is it, that you seem to make every meal except the ones where Beth and Christine are present?" demands the commander coolly as he crosses his arms in front of him while glaring down at her.

"It's…it's just work," Allura answers, gesturing to the piles of papers on her desk. "There's so much going on right now."

Keith's eyes flutter over various papers then his dark, angry gaze settles back on her, "Beth and Christine are under the impression that you do not wish to meet them. That they aren't good enough to sit through a dinner with you."

"That's…that's not…true," she manages to answer while pushing her chair back from her desk in an effort to put even more space between them.

He continues to stare at her for another minute as he tries to get his anger under control. His tone is barely civil as he states, "Beth was crying tonight as I was taking her home. She believes she's not good enough for me because of you." Keith places both hands on her desk as he leans toward the princess, "If our friendship means anything to you, I need you to rectify that impression. Beth and Christine are joining us again tomorrow night. I would appreciate it if you would appear at dinner and be cordial to them." His eyes have a hard look to them again as he finishes, "Whatever work you have, can wait."

Managing a nod, Allura whispers, "I'm sorry, Keith."

The hardness leaves his eyes as he stands up straight again. He nods to her then says, "I'll see you in the morning for practice. Good night."

She watches him as he turns around and heads for the door. Sucking in a deep breath, Allura manages to keep the sob from escaping until after it closes behind him. Wiping at the tears that begin to run down her cheeks, she rises and makes her way over to the bathroom that adjoins her office. Closing the door behind her, she lets loose the pain she has been holding in for the last month and a half.

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The next evening, Beth holds onto Keith's elbow as he leads her down the hallway toward the dining room. He had picked her up earlier in the afternoon and they had spent most of it riding horses in the meadows near her village. When he mentioned leaving for the castle so they would be on time for dinner, she had protested, "Why can't we just eat at my house tonight?"

"Because, I've already been gone from the castle for too long already." He had kissed her lovingly then added, "Princess Allura will be there tonight, she's assured me of it."

Her scathing reply had earned her a glare from Keith before he reminded her, "You wanted to meet her, here's your chance."

She had wanted to turn him down just for spite and remain home. Instead, she had gone up to her room, washed up then changed into her best dress. They were almost late because of the time she had spent on her hair. His impatience had been shining in his eyes when Beth had returned. Barely a word had been spoken on the ride to the castle.

Her fingers tighten on his arm as they approach the double doors. As they walk through, she finds the princess with her back turned to them, looking out the dining room windows. Her beautifully styled blonde hair hangs down her back, hiding the back of her pink dress. She turns upon hearing their entrance and smiles in greeting, "You must be Beth. Keith has told me so much about you."

Beth refuses to return the smile as she curtsies politely only to hear, "No need for such formalities, we are all friends here." Looking up, Beth finally smiles at her, "I'm so glad you are finally free to join us this evening. All that work must be wearisome."

Triumph floods her as the princess' smile fades slightly then she turns her attention to Lance and Christine as they approach. She can hear Keith's quiet sigh as he directs her away from the princess and over to their seats at the table. His eyes move over her as he inquires, "What do you think?"

Smiling at him, Beth lies, "She seems very nice."

Her answer seems to satisfy him for the moment as he nods at her then turns his attention to a question Hunk asks. Ignoring the conversation, Beth looks back over at the princess as Allura speaks with Christine. The smile on her face seems warmer as she reaches out with a hand to lightly touch Lance on the arm as they continue to speak. She pulls back a moment later then turns toward the table. Their eyes meet and Beth forces a smile her way. The princess' smile seems to dim slightly then she glances at the commander.

Jealousy eats through her as Beth notices the look in her eyes and she leans toward Keith, forcing his attention back to her. He smiles at her as she continues to lean into him. Her fingers move up to caress his cheek as she whispers, "I love you."

He takes her hand and kisses it then puts it down as the remaining people in the room take their seats. She looks across the table as dinner is served to find Princess Allura looking at her once more. She looks away when caught then begins a conversation with her advisor. Anger lashes through her as Beth thinks, _'What a bitch…'_ then turns her attention to her meal and her boyfriend.


	3. Chapter 3

Wow…so much for well-laid plans. I had hoped to post every couple of days, but life got in the way, as it usually does when I try to make plans. So two weeks later…here's an update. Couple of notes. Many thanks to all the reviewers, I enjoyed them and can understand a lot of your concerns. And to Nonny, I appreciated your ideas and still may try to incorporate some of them, but you need to realize a couple of things:

This is not a full rewrite, rather a revision. I know I haven't fixed all the problems with the original story, but tried to take care of a majority of them. In order to fix everything, I would have to do a total rewrite, tossing out scenes and recreating some other ones…it would probably end up as long as Origins in order to really do it right. Something I'm not prepared to do at this point. This is only a revision, so I repaired grammar issues and tried to make it flow better by adding and extending scenes while staying true to the original story. So consider this Version 2…will there be a Version 3 in the future where I do rip the whole thing apart? I don't have an answer to that at this point. Never say never though!

I also had a few people PM me about Beth being quite the witch…to put it in polite terms. Made me laugh, but you have to see her side of it as well. Allura did snub them for two weeks, so Beth was already holding that against her. As another friend pointed out, she noticed how Allura looked at Keith, which also had her upset. We women tend to turn nasty when we think someone wants our man…especially when that woman is a beautiful princess. So she may be a bit petty…but don't think of Beth as all bad…after all, Keith sees something in her. ;)

Here's hoping I can get the next chapter up sooner and keep the comments coming! Thanks!

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 3

Two days later, Keith looks up from his report when his office door opens to find Lance walking in to inform him, "The girls are here. They're waiting in the rec room for us."

Signing the report, he pushes it at Lance then says, "Can you take that over to Allura for me?" He glances down at himself, "I need to change quick."

"Sure," Lance replies then glances at himself, "I should probably change into something a little more formal as well." A bright smile crosses his face, "Need to keep up my image."

Snorting loudly, the commander rises from his desk, "We won't be in the dining room tonight. I arranged with Nanny for Beth and I to dine alone on the south terrace. I'll take her home by horseback after."

Nodding to him, Lance smiles, "I did something similar…dinner in the ballroom." He laughs, "Scary how we think alike."

"Beth and I haven't had much time alone together since she's started visiting the castle…nothing more," retorts Keith as he puts away the remaining papers.

"Yeah, I know…same problem with Christine." He smiles brightly, "All right, I'll get this dropped off then go pick up my girlfriend for dinner. See ya later!"

Shaking his head at him, Keith puts his data-pad away then heads out of his office. Ten minutes later, hair carefully brushed into place and clothing changed, he makes his way toward the rec room.

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Inside the rec room, Beth paces the length of the room then sighs at her impatience. If she was ever going to hope for a proposal of marriage from Keith, she had better get used to waiting for him. In his position, he was not always able to be on time. She glances over at the window where Christine blindly stares out, her arms wrapped around herself, awaiting Lance's arrival.

Her stance reminds her of the way they had found the princess waiting for them the other night. Gritting her teeth at the memory of that meeting, Beth walks over to her friend to casually ask, "What did you think of Princess Allura?"

Turning her attention away from the window, Christine shrugs, "She was nice enough, but seemed uncomfortable with our presence."

Snorting, Beth retorts, "She didn't want to be there at all. I think Keith said something to her so she would come to dinner. We've been coming to the castle for the last two weeks…she couldn't bother meeting us before."

"I know," sighs the other woman as she goes back to looking out the window. "I asked Lance about it, but he had no idea what was going on." She finally looks back, "He believed what she said, that she had work to do. Why else would she avoid us?"

"Because she liked having four men to herself every night and we're competition," answers Beth angrily. She glances back at the open door to the rec room to ensure no one was near then adds, "I saw the way that bitch was looking at Keith." She suddenly grabs Christine's hand, "Be careful with Lance, she may try to steal him away from you."

"Don't be ridiculous," answers Christine as she pulls her hand away, "Lance loves me…I know he does."

"Perhaps, but that doesn't mean the princess won't try to take him from you." Beth moves closer to her to confide, "I saw the way she touched Lance last night while you were talking. It wasn't appropriate. She kept watching all of us at dinner too. I'm telling you, the princess wants us gone so she can have them to herself again."

Christine shakes her head at her then notices movement by the door. She manages a smile for him, "Good evening, Commander Kogane."

Panic licks her sides as Beth turns to face her boyfriend. Wondering how long he had been there and how much he heard, she smiles brightly to cover their conversation, "You're finally here!"

Rushing across the room, she hugs him and is relieved when his arms move around her then feels his lips against her forehead before he explains, "Sorry Beth, I was hurrying as much as possible."

'_He must not have heard…'_ she thinks, relief filling her as she smiles up at him, "So what's for dinner tonight?"

"Dinner is just you and me…out on the terrace." He smiles at her, "I think we need to spend some time alone."

Moving closer until she is aligned chest to hip with him, Beth practically purrs, "I think that's just what we need."

Keith smiles in answer then turns his attention back to Christine to inform her, "Lance will be here soon for you. Unfortunately, I gave him another errand to run."

She nods as she moves to one of the chairs to sit down, "That's quite all right, Commander. He always makes it up to me."

Nodding to her, Keith wraps an arm around Beth's shoulders and begins leading her down the hallway. "Dinner won't be available for another half hour. Shall we go for a walk in the gardens while we wait?"

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Staring absently at Lance as he hands over the report Keith should have delivered himself, Allura barely hears his explanation until he finishes with, "Ok, I've got to get going. Christine is waiting for me."

Looking up suddenly, Allura manages a nod then asks, "See you at dinner?"

"Not tonight Princess, we're dining by ourselves in the ballroom. It will just be you, Hunk, Pidge and Coran, I'm afraid."

"Oh," she responds, her mind going back to the bit where he told her that Keith was dining with Beth alone as well.

"See you tomorrow morning," Lance finishes as he heads for the door. As it opens, he steps back suddenly to let the advisor pass by. Smiling at him in greeting, Lance leaves the room.

Coran glances curiously at him as the door closes then moves across the room. Coming to a stop in front of her desk, the older man smiles brightly as he announces, "Prince Ty of Planet Orland is planning a visit to court you. He will be here within the next two weeks."

Irritated, Allura glares up at him, "Coran, I don't have time to deal with a visitor right now. Lotor has been quiet for far too long and it's only a matter of time before he attacks again."

Sighing, the old adviser responds, "Princess Allura, you must consider the future. You need to wed, secure an alliance and produce an heir to the throne. You cannot wait for this war to end, it may never end." Coran walks around the desk and stares down at her, "Please, see reason, Princess. You owe it to this planet to continue the monarchy and you will never accomplish that if the only duty you focus on is the planet's protection."

Allura stands up from her chair then turns her back on him to move over to the window. Looking down on the gardens below, she finds Keith sitting on a bench with his arms around Beth, kissing her. Struggling to keep her emotions out of her voice, she says, "Fine Coran, invite him."

He thanks her then leaves the room. Allura waits until the door closes before she turns away from the scene in the garden, wiping away tears from her eyes.

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The next evening, Allura joins the group for dinner again. As she walks into the dining room, her eyes move over the room. She finds Keith already seated at the table beside Beth, speaking with her. Hunk and Pidge are by the window talking with Coran. She glances sideways when she feels someone nudging her. Lance smiles at her, "Hey, I didn't think you'd make it tonight. Heard about the upcoming visit and thought you would be busy preparing for it."

She smiles at back at him, "I locked my office door to keep everyone out and managed to get through my paperwork this afternoon, or I would still be working at it." He laughs at her but before he can comment further, Christine touches his arm to gain his attention and Lance turns away from the princess. The smile slips from her face as Allura turns to find her place at the table and a maid catches her eye. She nods to the woman, who nods back, as she sits down.

Toward the end of dinner, Allura looks around the table and notices that the commander is looking rather ill. Leaning forward in her chair, she asks, "Keith, are you feeling all right? You look a bit pale…"

Keith looks up from his dinner as Beth turns toward him concerned, grabbing his arm. His face is indeed alarmingly pale with sweat beading upon his forehead. He smiles tremulously at her then looks back at Allura to answer, "Actually I'm not feeling well all of a sudden." Pulling his arm away from Beth, he pushes away from the table, "I think I need to retire." His attention briefly turns to Lance, "Can you please make sure Beth gets home?"

At Lance's nod, the commander stands up then exits the room. Beth watches him go before looking at the lieutenant anxiously, "Is he going to be all right?"

Nodding, Lance replies, "I'm sure he will be fine, Beth. Keith is the type who likes to be left alone when he isn't feeling well though."

From her seat, Allura's eyes move away from the door the commander just exited through and settles her attention back on those remaining at the table.

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The next morning, Lance is a bit surprised to see Keith walking into the dining room for breakfast. His pallor is back to normal and he looks well. Walking over to him, he says, "Considering how sick you looked last night, I thought you would still be in bed today."

Keith smiles at him, "I'm kind of surprised too. Outside of a really strange dream last night, I slept like the dead. I felt great when I woke up this morning."

Smirking, Lance inquires, "So what was the dream?"

He almost laughs as the commander flushes a bright read before replying, "Not one I will ever tell you about, Lance."

His eyebrows go up as Lance chortles, "That good huh?"

Shaking his head, Keith refuses to answer as the rest of the Force enters the room. He watches the princess curiously, with her head turned away, she refuses to look any of them in the eye. Sitting down at the table, Keith continues to study her during breakfast, her pale face and the dark circles under her eyes concerning him. She merely picks at her food, barely eating any of it and ignores the chatter around her.

When the group finishes breakfast, Keith grabs her elbow, stopping her from leaving the room as the others file out. His eyes move over her face as she finally looks up at him for the first time that morning. Her eyes meet his then dart away then look back again. Trying to keep the worry out of his tone, he asks, "Are you feeling all right, Princess? You look like you've caught the flu bug I had last night."

Flushing, the princess quickly looks away from him as she nods then quietly replies, "I'm fine." Keith's eyebrows furrow in concern as he thinks, '_She's acting funny_.' Stopping her from walking away by tightening his grip on her arm, he asks, "Princess is something wrong?"

Allura finally looks back up at him, "Everything is fine Keith." She pulls her arm away from him then turns, leaving the room. Keith watches her go still concerned, '_I don't care what she says…something is wrong…'_ Vowing to find out later, he follows her out of the room.

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Two weeks later, Prince Ty ship arrives and Coran waits anxiously to formally greet him. Allura stands beside him, a pleasant smile of greeting on her face. The rest of the Voltron Force is lined up behind them. As the prince steps down from his ship, the advisor steps forward and bows, "Prince Ty, you do us great honor by visiting us."

Prince Ty smiles at Coran, thanking him then moves his gaze to the princess. He takes a step toward her and smiles appreciatively, "Princess Allura…you are even more beautiful than I imagined," he says as he bends over her hand to place a kiss on the back of it. Allura nods her head in response then turns, gesturing to the rest of the Force, she introduces them.

Studying the prince Keith decides, for a man, he seems handsome enough. About his height, the prince has light brown hair and blue eyes. He also has a muscular build, suggesting he worked out and he definitely had the air of royalty in the way he walked and held himself. What impresses Keith the most is the simplicity of his clothing. For a prince, he did not dress like one. Prince Ty is dressed in a simple black pantsuit, a ribbon on his shoulder the only thing that gave away his station.

Allura introduces him last, "This is Keith Kogane, Commander of the Voltron Force."

Bowing his head in deference toward Prince Ty, Keith looks back up as he nods his head in acknowledgement before holding out his hand. Surprised, the commander keeps his face impassive and takes the hand. As they shake, Prince Ty smiles at him, "An honor…I've heard a great deal about you, Commander. I'm hoping most of it is true."

Keith arches an eyebrow in question and smiles, "Only if it is good…"

Chuckling, his eyes shine with merriment as Prince Ty responds, "It certainly is Commander…once again a pleasure." Turning away, he takes Allura's elbow so she can escort him into the castle.

The others follow as Keith stands there, watching the couple heading for the castle entrance. Lance notices that Keith isn't following and lags behind as well. He looks back at the group entering the castle then looks at his friend again, "So what do you think?"

Shrugging, the commander finally pulls his attention away from the group to answer, "He seems fairly modest for royalty. Like the other princes we have met, I expected him to be arrogant."

Lance smiles as he glances back at the fading backs of the prince and princess, "I was a bit surprised too. Let's hope for Princess' sake, he is actually a nice guy."

Sighing, Keith nods then walks with Lance as they follow the group into the castle.

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That night at dinner, Beth feels her irritation with Keith climbing. She had been ecstatic when he extended the invitation so she could dine with them tonight and meet Prince Ty. She was looking forward to relaying information about him to her girlfriends during lunch tomorrow. However, Keith has been less than attentive. Most of his attention seems to be on the prince and princess. She turns in her chair toward him trying to gain his attention, but once again his head is turned down the table and he is watching Prince Ty and Princess Allura closely. Reaching her breaking point, Beth grabs the top of Keith's thigh under the table.

Startled, Keith finally turns towards her and looks at her questioningly. Beth raises an eyebrow and leans toward him to whisper, "What's going on Keith? You've barely looked my way all evening, much less talked to me."

Chagrined, the commander replies, "Sorry, I'm just worried about the princess. She's been distracted and unhappy lately."

Beth shifts her gaze from Keith back up the table at the princess and notices for the first time that her smiles to the prince seem forced as he regales her with another one of his tales. She turns back to Keith, "Maybe it is simply that she doesn't like Prince Ty but is too polite to say so?"

Nodding, Keith turns back toward his plate. However, his eyes move up the table to Princess Allura once more. He studies her eyes, noting the lack of warmth in them as she converses with Prince Ty and Coran. '_No, there is something else bothering her.'_ Keith sighs quietly and forces himself to return his attention to his meal and Beth.

Quietly, Allura fumes inwardly while trying to keep the smile on her face and listen to Prince Ty as he continues to tell one of his stories. Her eyes drift once more to Keith and Beth. She had seen Beth's hand slip below the table and Keith's face turn a bright red as he turned to face her. Soon, her anger turns to sadness and she forces her attention back to Prince Ty.

After dinner, Keith escorts Beth home. At her doorstep, she wraps her arms around him and pulls him close for a kiss. Smiling up into his face, she asks, "So will I see you tomorrow?"

Keith smiles apologetically at her, "Sorry love…I'm on duty all day tomorrow. Princess is taking Prince Ty for a tour of the countryside and I get to play body guard." He laughs at the pouty look on her face and kisses her once more. "Good night Beth."

She pulls him back to her as he is about to turn away. Running her fingers through his hair, she leans back into him to whisper in his ear, "You could stay tonight."

Pulling away enough to see her face, Keith kisses her forehead, "We've discussed this…"

Sighing with disappointment, Beth leans up on her tiptoes to nuzzle his neck as her fingers caress his chest, "Maybe, but you could always change your mind."

As her fingers drift down to the top of his pants, Keith pulls her tight to him, kisses her senseless then releases her, "When we are ready Beth and not before." He kisses her once more, smiles as he says, "Goodnight," then turns and walks away.


	4. Chapter 4

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 4

Sighing tiredly the next morning, Keith sits at the breakfast table as he slowly drinks his coffee. He looks over at Lance as the other man walks into the room. Smiling at him, the commander asks, "Ready for a day of guard duty?"

Clearing his throat, Lance responds, "Actually Keith, I asked Hunk if he would take my place. I have something I need to take care of today."

Keith arches a brow at him as he sarcastically answers, "Something more important than doing your job?"

Grimacing, the lieutenant pleads his case, "Come on Keith, Hunk can play body guard just as well as I can and I need to do this."

Sitting back in his chair, Keith studies the sudden intense look on his friend's face, "Care to fill me in?"

Shaking his head, Lance says, "It's just something I need to do today…I'll tell you about it later."

Rolling his eyes, the commander takes another sip from his coffee cup before replying, "Very well. Do you plan on at least attending dinner tonight?"

Lance nods his head then turns away as Princess Allura and Prince Ty enter the dining room.

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That night, Keith rubs his temples, trying to fight off the headache that started that afternoon. He turns and looks around the dining room wondering where in the hell Lance is. His eyes drift over the people in the room one by one. Hunk and Pidge are sitting at the table discussing some changes for the weapons systems on the lions that they want to work on. Coran stands near the door, sipping on a glass of wine and Princess stands near the windows, looking out as Prince Ty continues a dialog they had started that afternoon.

Sighing, Keith rubs his temples once more as the princess excuses herself from Prince Ty and approaches him to ask, "Should we continue to hold dinner for Lance?"

Keith opens his mouth to answer but stops when a smiling Lance enters the room escorting Christine. He holds Christine's hand tightly within his own as they approach them. Keith raises an eyebrow at the lieutenant, who turns to the room at large, "All, may I introduce Mrs. Christine McClain!"

Feeling his eyes widening in shock, Keith watches Lance lift the hand he is holding to place a kiss near the wedding ring now glistening on Christine's finger. Allura rushes forward, "Congratulations!" and hugs first Lance and then Christine. She happily smiles first at them then turns toward Christine, "You don't know how lucky you are." The new Mrs. McClain returns the smile then turns toward Lance, who dips his head toward her to kiss her.

Everyone surrounds Lance and Christine, congratulating and hugging them. Keith smiles as he notices Nanny wiping tears out of her eyes. Allura turns to the older woman, "His current room isn't going to be big enough Nanny, please prepare one of the suites for them."

Opening his mouth to object, Lance snaps it shut when the princess gives him a stern look, "You will accept the rooms, Lieutenant. I'm sure Christine would appreciate not having to share your small closet."

Christine laughs as her husband turns red then accepts the gift graciously. The commander slaps his friend on the back, "So this was what you needed to take care of? Couldn't share the moment with us?"

Lance has the good grace to blush once more, "I didn't want to share her with anyone, Keith."

Nodding at him, Keith replies, "I understand Lance…I understand."

The group finally calms down and sits down to what is now a celebration dinner while Nanny goes into the kitchen to find bottles of champagne.

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Finished with his dinner, Prince Ty glances to the woman next to him. She had been abnormally quiet through most of dinner, her eyes seemingly on the lieutenant and his wife. He moves his attention to the commander, who sits next to his friend, laughing and joking as the rest of the men pick on Lance about being afraid of cold feet, hence the secret wedding.

Placing his napkin on top of his plate, he turns his attention back to the woman next to him. Irritated that she isn't paying him the least bit of attention, the prince asks, "Care for a walk in the gardens before retiring for the night?"

She does not answer him as her gaze moves over the people at the other end of the table. Anger lashes at him as he grabs her hand, startling her, "Allura, I asked if you wanted to take a walk in the gardens. Didn't you hear me?"

"Sorry Ty, I'm just a little tired from our outing this afternoon. I guess I wasn't paying attention."

Nodding to her, he rises then takes her hand, "Well, let's go take that walk then.

Given no choice, Allura allows him to help her rise. They wave at the people in the room before leaving. Prince Ty smiles to himself as they walk toward the garden; this is the first time he will have the princess all to himself without any escorts to spy on them.

Entering the garden, Ty smiles as he takes in the perfect setting the place gives him. Small lanterns light the paths leading to the center, casting shadows along the flowers. As they near the center and the fountain it contains, Prince Ty slips his arm around her waist. When Allura does not immediately protest, he stops them and pulls her close so that he can stare into her eyes, "You are so beautiful Allura…words cannot describe your beauty."

Allura does not reply but just smiles at the compliment then tries to pull away. He grabs her, yanks her hard against him and begins kissing her. Allura puts her hands up against his chest, trying to push him away but he just tightens his grip and moves one hand to her head to hold her still.

Getting a hand between them, Allura finally pushes against his face until there is space between them then angrily slaps him, "How dare you?"

Trying to rub the stinging sensation away from his cheek, Prince Ty smiles ruefully at her then makes another move. Circling his arms around her waist again, he tries to pull her close, "Allura, marry me and I'll make you the happiest, most cherished woman in the universe."

Allura brings up her arms, trying to stop him when Keith's voice rings out, "Princess, do you require some assistance?"

The prince releases her as if he was burned and turns toward Keith, "No Commander, she does not."

Moving closer to them, Keith's steely gaze moves over him coldly as he replies, "I don't believe I asked you." His gaze shifts to Allura, "Do you require some assistance?"

Moving away from Prince Ty to walk toward Keith, she answers, "Yes, an escort to my room please." She takes Keith's elbow then looks back at Prince Ty coolly once more, "Good evening."

He attempts another smile at her, "Until the morning, my princess."

Her grip on Keith's elbow tightens as he turns her around and they exit the garden. As they walk down the hall and up the stairs to the third floor, Keith tries to keep his voice calm, "Are you all right?"

She does not immediately answer and Keith turns his face toward her to see tears running down her cheeks. He changes directions and escorts her out onto the balcony. Allura releases his arm and walks to the edge, staring out onto the countryside, "Thanks Keith."

Moving beside her, fury resonates in his tone as he asks, "Do you want me to go back and teach him a lesson?"

Allura turns toward him, shocked, "I'm fine Keith. He isn't the first prince to try to steal kisses."

Making a sound of disgust in the back of his throat, he retorts, "You should have flipped him into the rose bushes like I taught you. Spending the rest of the evening picking thorns out of his backside would have made him think twice before trying that again."

Quiet laughter finally escapes her as she wipes at her cheeks then replies, "I can imagine what Coran and Nanny would have said to that."

Relieved that she seems to be fine, his anger calms as he listens to her laugh then snorts, "Perhaps, but he should have known better than to try to take advantage of you to begin with."

She smiles at him then the troubled look enters her eyes again as she turns away and looks across the lake. Sighing deeply, Keith inquires, "Princess, what's wrong?"

Refusing to look at him, Allura continues to stare across the lake, "Nothing is wrong."

Walking up to her, Keith pulls Allura toward him, so she faces him. He studies her eyes, eyes now watery with unshed tears, "Yes, there is Princess. Something has been bothering you for a while now." She pulls away from him, turning back toward the lake. Frustrated, he touches her shoulder, "Please Allura…I can't help you if you won't let me."

Turning back to face him, Allura studies him closely, her eyes glistening. Clearly visible within her blue gaze, is the debate of whether to talk to him or not going on in her mind. Hoping to spur her on, Keith reaches out and caresses her cheek, "I care what happens to you, please, let me help you."

A tear escapes to run down her cheek as she looks away from him. He watches her take several deep breaths before she looks back at him again. Her eyes show her uncertainty as she begins to whisper, "Keith, I'm in lo…"

"Princess! What are you doing out here alone with the Commander?" Nanny interrupts her, "What would Prince Ty think?" She grabs Allura's arm and pulls her off the balcony, "I will escort you to your room young lady…"

Fuming as the steady stream of Nanny's barrage to the princess continues down the hall, Keith swears, '_Damn that woman…just when I was going to find out what is bothering Allura.' _He forms a fist with his hand and hits the top of the balcony, trying to control his anger. Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, he turns and heads toward his room.

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The next day, Allura walks toward the advisor's office. She knocks on the door and enters without waiting for an answer, "Coran, I need…" then stops when she sees Prince Ty sitting in front of Coran's desk. "What's going on?"

Both Prince Ty and Coran stand as she walks farther into the room, her eyes moving over Prince Ty then turning to her advisor. Coran smiles at her, "Prince Ty and I were discussing a possible alliance between Arus and Orland."

Angry, Allura narrows her eyes on them, "So why wasn't I involved in these discussions? You do not sign off on these alliances Coran, I do."

Reaching out to take her hand, Prince Ty smiles while adding, "We meant no disrespect, Allura. You've been so busy with your practices with the Voltron Force and trying to keep me entertained, that I didn't think you would mind my discussing the possibilities of our union with Coran."

Incredulous, Allura backs away before he can touch her as she demands, "What union?"

Prince Ty smiles pacifyingly at her again, "Why our marriage of course."

Fury flies through her as the princess retorts, "You have not asked for my hand in marriage and I have not agreed to one."

Taking a step toward her, Ty takes her hand, squeezing it gently, "I thought we had an understanding, my dear. Why else would I come here?"

Yanking her hand away from him then moving away, Allura snarls, "Maybe there was an understanding in your mind, but let me clarify. There will be no union between you and me."

Turning red in the face as he grows angry, the prince states, "Princess Allura, you need an alliance between our planets and I need a queen."

Allura glares at him, "Then I suggest you look elsewhere, Prince Ty, for you have made a grievous error thinking I would agree to a marriage with you just because you came to visit."

Opening his mouth to try to placate her, Coran does not get a word out as Allura angrily turns toward him, "Prince Ty has overstayed his welcome. Please escort him to his ship." Without waiting for his reply, she turns and walks out of the room, running into Keith in the hallway.

He grabs her arm to steady her so she does not fall, "Princess, is everything all right?"

Ripping her arm away from him, she scowls, "I'm fine."

Keith raises an eyebrow in disbelief at her, "You don't look fine."

Glaring at him, Allura snarls, "I am sick to death of people telling me what I look like, how I should feel and what I should do. Leave me the hell alone Commander," then turns and walks down the hall away from him.

Flabbergasted, he watches her walk away then steps aside as Prince Ty exits the advisor's office, glaring at him as he passes Keith in the hallway. Coran steps out of his office finally and glares at the parting backs. Keith raises an eyebrow at him, "What happened?"

Coran says nothing, just turns his glare on Keith briefly before he turns the other direction and walks down the hall. The commander watches his departing back for a moment then continues on his way while thinking, _'That must have been some meeting…'_

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Sitting at dinner that evening, Allura stares silently at her plate as she picks at her food while listening to the conversations around her. Word about Prince Ty's departure had spread quickly and everyone had been wise enough to avoid the topic. Then again, everyone pretty much was avoiding talking to her entirely and she couldn't blame them. She had spent the entire afternoon in a temper and anything any one said or did around her seemed to set her off. She had managed to chew out Keith, Lance and finally Nanny when she had asked her a simple question about how she wanted to dress for dinner. Hunk and Pidge had heard of her bad mood and have been avoiding her.

Lifting her eyes, she glances across the table to find Christine and Beth deep in conversation. Upon her arrival, Beth had grabbed Christine's hand to admire her new wedding ring, said something about how lucky she was and finished by sending an envious look Keith's way. In answer, the commander leaned over, whispered something to her and kissed her cheek. That show of affection had added to Allura's bad temper. Determined to ignore them, she had stared down at her plate in silence for most of the evening.

Studying them now, a deep sadness fills her as she watches Keith lean over to whisper something to Beth once more. Unable to continue watching anymore, Allura suddenly stands, "I think I'll say good night." Ignoring the responses from the room, she quickly makes her way to the door and out of the room.

From his seat, Keith stares at the door the princess had just exited thru. He glances up at the advisor to find the older man staring at the door as well, a perplexed expression on his face.

"What's her problem?"

Turning his attention to Beth, he replies, "She's had a bad day."

Staring at his girlfriend, he can tell she is thinking of asking another question or making another comment. Instead, she finally shrugs and turns back to her conversation with Christine. Sighing to himself, Keith returns his attention back to his dinner. He glances up to answer a question Pidge asks, but his mind continues to be on the woman who left the room so abruptly.

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Two weeks later, Allura awakens to the sound of Nanny's frantic voice, "What are you still doing in bed? You won't have time for breakfast before practice now!" Opening her eyes, she looks over to find her governess over by her closet pulling out her flight suit. Throwing back the covers, she starts to rise then pauses when a wave of dizziness overtakes her. Placing a hand to her forehead, Allura wipes at her suddenly clammy brow.

"Princess? Is everything all right?"

Dropping her hand, Allura snaps at her governess, "Of course I am."

Ignoring the doubtful expression on the older woman's face, the princess starts for the bathroom, "I suppose I had better get a shower."

Forty minutes later, Allura arrives in the control room to find the other men waiting on her. As she moves toward the raised control center, she ignores Lance's snide remark of, "Did you decide to sleep in?"

"Princess, you know better…"

Overriding Keith, she snaps, "Let's just get to practice," and heads for the launch chute to her lion.

As she disappears down the shaft, Lance looks over to find Keith red in the face as he tries to control his temper. Clearing his throat, the lieutenant quietly suggests, "Guess we should follow her?" only to receive a glare from his commanding officer.

He listens to a volley of swear words escape his friend before Keith finally snarls, "Let's go!" to the rest of the men.

Sarcastically thinking, _'This is going to be a fun day…'_ Lance follows the others toward the chutes.

An hour later, Keith watches in horror while Pidge's yell echoes through the comm. systems just as the young man jerks Green lion away from a collision with Blue lion. Feeling his fury rising with Allura, the commander finally yells at her, "Princess, where is your head?"

Inside Blue lion, Allura tries to stop trembling at the near collision. Taking a deep breath, she looks over at the video comm. link in her lion to see Keith's irritated expression. He glares at her, "Have you listened to a single order I've given you today or are you making stuff up as you go along?"

Unable to hold his gaze, she looks away from the screen as she retorts, "I'm doing the best I can, Keith."

The sound of his snort of derision echoes inside her lion, "Return the lion to its lair, I'll speak with you when we are on the ground," and the screen goes black as he shuts off the connection between them.

Allura closes her eyes briefly, anxiety making her feel sick, and turns Blue lion towards the castle. As she exits the launch tube, Keith is standing in front of her, arms crossed while glaring at her. The princess steps forward and attempts to walk past him, but he grabs her arm, forcing her to turn and face him.

She looks at him briefly then looks past him to see Coran and the others watching the confrontation. She pulls her arm away from Keith as he starts, "In the last month, you've continuously failed to follow orders and almost caused a head on crash with Pidge's lion today. You've been argumentative and impossible to deal with. What is going on with you?"

Staring blankly at him briefly, Allura refuses to answer as she turns to walk away again, stopping only when she hears him snarl, "Princess Allura, until further notice you are grounded."

Turning around, eyes wide with shock, she listens as Keith continues, "You are putting everyone's lives in danger up there and I can't allow that."

Face paling and her eyes tearing up, Allura pulls the lion key off her uniform and throws it at Keith's face, which he catches, before turning around and running out of castle control. The commander's face is impassive as he turns to Coran, "Please contact Sven and ask him to come to Arus. We will need him to take the princess' place for now."

Hunk and Pidge look at Lance incredibly as Keith walks out of the room without saying another word. Pidge is the first to speak, "I can't believe he grounded her."

Shaking his head, Lance retorts, "If it had been one of us performing like that, we would have been grounded a long time ago and he would be kicking our ass in the gym right now." He sighs as he leaves castle control.

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Wandering down the hall, Lance changes direction at the last moment. Instead of heading to his room, he finds his way out into the garden, locating the person he is looking for. Allura is sitting on a bench crying as Lance approaches her and sits beside her.

He lightly touches her shoulder only to have her pull away from him. Sighing, the lieutenant quietly says, "You used to talk to me…"

Sucking in a sobbing breath, Allura looks back at him then turns away again. Her tone is derisive as she answers, "You used to have time to talk to me."

Lance snorts in disgust as he crosses his arms in front of his chest, "Princess, I always have time to talk to you. All you ever need to do is ask."

She sits up and wipes her face as she retorts, "I take it you haven't noticed how your wife dislikes you spending time with me?"

Irritated, Lance moves closer to her on the bench, "Allura, this isn't about me or Christine. Your behavior has changed a lot in the last month, why?"

Glaring at him, the princess gets up and leaves the garden without answering. Lance watches her go then startles when he hears Keith behind him, "Did she tell you anything?"

Wheeling around, the lieutenant scowls at him, "You really have to quit sneaking up on people like that!"

Keith looks at him briefly then back to the door Allura just went through as he replies, "Lance, something has been bothering her for quite some time. Did she tell you anything?"

Sighing as his anger leaves him, Lance says, "No, just some garbage about Christine not liking me spending time talking to her."

Shaking his head with a sad laugh, Keith responds, "She has a point…"

Looking incredibly up at him, Lance demands, "What the hell do you mean by that comment?"

"Just something I heard Beth and Christine talking about a while ago, something I wasn't supposed to hear. At the time, I dismissed it due to their irritation with Allura because she had been avoiding the dining room when they visited. I couldn't blame them for being angry with her," the commander answers with a shrug.

Lance grimaces, "I'm going to have to speak to Christine about it…"

Grabbing his shoulder, Keith says, "Leave it alone for now. Sven is bringing Romelle along. Hopefully, she will be able to figure out what is going on with the princess."

"I hope so," answers Lance as he stands up and heads for the doors to the castle, "At this rate, Allura will never fly that lion again."

Refusing to contemplate that statement, Keith does not reply as he walks with him back into the castle.


	5. Chapter 5

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 5

Two days later, Keith stands on the tarmac as the shuttle from Planet Pollux lands. Romelle and Sven disembark a few minutes later and he greets them as they approach, "Welcome."

Sven shakes Keith's hand and then pulls him into a hug. Romelle hugs Keith next then looks around curiously, "Where is Allura? I thought she would be here."

Grimacing, he lowers his gaze, he answers, "In her room, to my knowledge. Since I grounded her, we haven't seen her."

Sven's eyebrows go up as Romelle's expression turns worried, "She has hidden herself away?"

Running his hand through his hair in agitation, Keith looks back at her to respond, "Romelle, Princess Allura's behavior has become more and more perplexing and disturbing the last couple of months. She won't tell any of us what is bothering her and believe me, I've tried several times to get her to open up. I finally had to ground her when she almost caused a crash in the lions." He pauses to sigh then stares at her intently, "I am hoping she will tell you what is going on with her, because I am at my wits end."

Nodding to him, Romelle turns to her husband, "I'm going to go to her. I'll see you later." Sven nods at her, kisses her cheek then watches her walk away before turning back to Keith, "How long do you expect us to stay?"

Shrugging, the commander replies, "I have no idea, Sven. I am hoping Romelle can figure out what is wrong with Allura soon. However, I can't trust her to fly the lions the way she is behaving currently. She's going to be the death of one of us."

Sighing, Sven nods at him, "Well, let's go in so I can say hello to everyone else. I need to congratulate Lance on his marriage, which I didn't get an invitation to."

"Neither did I," laughs Keith and Sven turns his gaze back to him, "Speaking of marriage, I hear you have a girlfriend these days as well. Thinking of joining the club?"

Keith smiles at him, "I've given it some thought, yes…but haven't made a decision yet."

Arching an eyebrow at him, Sven snorts, "Typical Keith…needs to analyze every aspect of it before making a decision."

Laughing, Keith gestures to the castle, "Enough old friend, let's go inside." Sven smiles at him and they walk into the castle together.

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Approaching her cousin's bedroom door, Romelle knocks. When she does not hear anything, she knocks again, "Allura, it's me, Romelle. May I come in?"

Still silence, perplexed, Romelle presses the button for the door and walks in when it opens. Looking around the room, she is shocked to see Allura lying in her bed. Romelle cautiously approaches the bed, "Allura?"

Hearing a quiet sob, she steps around it and looks at her cousin. She is under the covers, still in her nightgown, her face buried in her pillow. "Allura are you all right?"

Turning her head to look at her, Allura opens her eyes and Romelle is shocked by how red and despondent they are. Tears form once more and escape them as Allura closes her eyes again and pushes her face back into her pillow. Romelle sits down on the bed beside her, her hand moving over her hair, "Allura! What's wrong?"

A sob escapes from her cousin as Romelle lies down on the bed and wraps her arms around her cousin, listening to her as she continues to cry. Romelle strokes her hair as she whispers, "Sweetheart, please talk to me. What's wrong?"

Pulling away, Allura sobs, "They don't…want me…anymore."

Romelle looks at her confused, "Who doesn't want you?"

Sniffling, she sits up, pulling away from her cousin, "They…threw me…off the…Force."

Sitting up, Romelle tries to soothe her, "Allura, it isn't because they don't want you. Keith is very concerned about you." She studies her face closely, noticing for the first time how gaunt her cousin looks, "What else is wrong Allura? You've lost weight and are very pale, are you feeling all right?"

Shaking her head, Allura lies back on the pillows, "I've felt sick the last two days."

Her eyebrows draw together in concern, Romelle asks, "Have you seen Dr. Gorma?"

Allura shakes her head again as she sobs, "I don't want…to see Dr. Gorma."

Sighing, Romelle studies her face once more, "All right, it's probably just the stress. Nevertheless, Allura, something else is wrong. Keith and the others have all noticed something is bothering you and it's affecting everything you do."

Closing her eyes, she denies it, "Nothing is wrong. I just don't feel well right now." She turns away from her cousin and becomes quiet. Romelle strokes hair back once more, "All right Allura, I'll let you rest. I'll see you later."

Rising from the bed, Romelle leaves the room. She walks down to the commander's office and knocks on the door. Upon hearing, "Enter" she opens the door to find Sven, Lance and Keith sitting around the desk.

They stand as she enters the room and Romelle walks over to Sven, who wraps an arm around her waist and kisses her forehead. Sighing deeply, the princess rests her head against his shoulder for a moment then turns to look at the others in the room. She smiles, "Hi Lance," then steps forward to hug him. She steps back, still smiling, "Congratulations on your marriage."

Lance smiles his thanks then becomes serious, "Did she tell you anything?"

Shrugging, Romelle answers, "Yes and no. The reason you haven't seen her for two days is it seems she has some type of flu bug. However, she is upset, thinking you don't want her on the Force anymore."

Keith stays silent as Lance snorts while rolling his eyes, "She should know better than that."

Looking side to side, studying both of them, Romelle inquires, "Have you told her that?"

Feeling uncomfortable, Keith starts, "We haven't exactly had a chance to talk to her since I grounded her."

Snorting derisively again, Lance retorts, "And whenever we tried talking to her in the last couple of months, she bit our heads off."

Leaning into her husband again, Romelle sighs, "Well, when she is feeling better, I'll try talking to her again."

"Good luck…" derides Lance as he heads for the door.

Directing the couple to move over to the couch area, Keith sits down himself before explaining, "I have tried talking to her, Romelle. I've asked her numerous times what's been bothering her only for her to deny anything is wrong, when there obviously is something going on."

"What's changed?" asks the princess.

"What do you mean?" questions the commander as he looks at her curiously.

"When did she start behaving differently?" responds Romelle, "What has changed around here that Allura started to act differently?"

Feeling very uncomfortable, Keith glances at his friend. Sven lifts an eyebrow at him as if to say, _'Don't ask me…I wasn't here.'_ Turning back to Romelle, the commander shrugs, "I'm not entirely sure. I first noticed it during Prince Ty's visit…Allura seemed quiet and withdrawn. It's been getting steadily worse."

She stares at him for a minute more, making him feel even more uncomfortable until Romelle finally nods in acceptance. Relief fills him a moment later when Sven changes the subject.

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Two days later, Allura finally leaves her room and hesitantly walks toward the dining room for breakfast. As she enters the room, Romelle smiles at her and crosses the room to hug her, "I'm glad you are up and about. Are you feeling better?"

Nodding wordlessly, she turns to face Sven as he joins them to give her a hug as well, "Good morning. I'm sorry to hear you haven't been feeling well."

A tentative smile slips across her face as she murmurs, "Thanks Sven," then turns away. He continues to study her as she walks with Romelle across the room and they take their seats. The commander moves across the room to join him. He eyes the princesses as well then whispers, "She still looks pretty ill."

Turning to face him, Sven nods silently then gestures toward the table. Keith walks away to take his seat, sitting down across from Allura. He manages to catch her gaze and smiles at her, "Good morning, Princess."

Nervous, Allura studies him for a moment then speaks quietly, "Good morning, Keith," before looking back down at her plate. Sighing at her reluctant answer, he tries again, "Feeling better?"

Her eyes rise to meet his again, "I'm fine." Keith holds her gaze, "I'm glad," and smiles at her once more. The princess nods to him then turns away as the servants bring in the breakfast platters.

Thirty minutes later, Keith wipes his mouth with his napkin then lays it across his plate. He glances across the table to find Allura and Romelle rising from the seats. Standing, he says, "Allura," to gain her attention. When she turns to face him, he adds, "Stay for a moment, Princess. I want a word."

Romelle smiles encouragingly at her and takes Sven's elbow, exiting the room with him. Keith waits until everyone else leaves then sits back down at the table and gestures to Allura to join him. She slowly sits back down at the table then looks at him apprehensively.

Sitting back in the chair, Keith studies her pales face then sighs. His tone is conciliatory as he says, "Princess, the suspension isn't permanent. I want you to get well and figure out what is bothering you."

Turning away from him, she returns, "Nothing is bothering me."

Anger shoots through him as Keith snarls, "Bullshit, Allura!" Her eyes widen in shock as she swiftly looks back him because he has never sworn at her before. Reaching forward, he grabs her shoulders, the look in his eyes furious, "Allura, something has been bothering you for the last couple of months and it's affecting your ability to do your job. That is why I suspended you."

Her eyes fill with tears as she looks away from him. Sighing again, Keith releases her and sits back in his chair. He watches her wipe at her cheeks then calmly says, "I'm your friend, Princess. But you of all people know how dangerous flying those lions is and you need your mind on flying when you are flying."

He leans forward once more and pulls her chin toward him so she faces him. Smiling softly, Keith finishes, "I still want you on the Force, Allura. However, you need to prove to me that you can fly without putting everyone in danger. When you can do that, you can have Blue lion back. All right?"

Sucking in a deep breath, Allura nods then pulls away, rises and leaves the room. Keith watches her go then looks out the windows of the dining room, lost in thought.

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Over the next two weeks, Romelle tries off and on to get her cousin to talk to her. However, every time she brings up the subject, Allura becomes quiet or walks away from her. Lying in Sven's arms one night, the princess growls out her frustration, "Keith is right Sven, something is bothering Allura! But I'll be damned if I can get her to talk to me about it."

Sven arches a brow at her language, "Ok, since you are swearing, I take it you are frustrated…" then grunts when Romelle slaps his chest. Rubbing lightly at the spot, he rephrases, "Ok, very frustrated." Sitting up, she glares at him, "Unless you have some wise idea to get Allura to talk to me, I don't need smart aleck comments, Sven."

Smiling apologetically, Sven leans up and kisses her. Moving his hand from her back, he slides it up then pushes his fingers in to her hair, massaging her scalp. Romelle closes her eyes and sighs in appreciation then lies back down across his chest. She listens to the sound of his heartbeat while he kisses the top of her head. His hand suddenly moves from her hair down along her back again, "Maybe you just need to be patient with her, Romelle. Allura will talk to you when she is ready."

Placing a chaste kiss his chest, she quietly answers, "It's just, I know how much she wants to fly again."

Groaning quietly as Romelle's hands begin moving along his body, Sven says, "I'll talk to Keith and see if we can get her up into Blue for a day as a Christmas gift. It might help encourage her a bit."

Pushing herself up into a sitting position, Romelle straddles her husband. Smiling down into his face, she barely pays attention to his hands moving up her sides, "It would lift her spirits a bit that's for sure. You are such a sweet man for thinking of it," she teases him as she moves her hips against him then lowers herself to kiss him.

Her hand palms him, causing Sven to gasp. He flips them in the bed so he is lying on top of her, a sexy smile slipping across his face, "Now for you to lift my spirits, my love…" Romelle laughs as Sven finds her lips then takes them to heaven.

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It is Christmas day and Keith is full of anticipation. Although the holiday is not normally celebrated on Arus, Princess Allura has always had the rec room decorated with a tree for the Force, so they may follow their tradition. He looks at the small box in his hand and smiles. Entering the rec room, Keith places it under the tree then looks up at the clock as he thinks, _'Beth is supposed to arrive shortly for Christmas dinner then we will open gifts.' _Anticipating her reaction to his gift, he smiles to himself as he leaves the room.

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Sitting at her vanity, Allura stares blindly into the mirror as behind her, Nanny finishes brushing out her hair. Studying her reflection, her eyes move over her pale face, noting the lack of color. Glancing at the image of her bed, the princess wishes she could return to it instead of the dinner that will soon begin. Exhaustion seems to be all she can feel lately as Allura finally looks back at herself in the mirror. An earlier crying jag had left her with red puffy eyes, which she had hidden with a cool washcloth against her eyes then a bath before her governess had arrived to help her dress.

"There you go Highness, you're ready."

"Thanks Nanny," she whispers in reply as she stands up. Dizziness assails her and she grabs the edge of her vanity. Sucking in a deep breath, Allura hears the older woman continue, "I must return to the kitchen now or dinner won't be ready on time."

Grateful that her governess had turned away and failed to see her moment of weakness, Allura forces herself to stand upright just as Nanny turns back to ask, "Is there anything else you need?"

Forcing a smile on her face, the princess shakes her head, "No, I'm fine thanks," then wishes she had just answered verbally as another bout of dizziness threatens to overtake her. Managing to maintain her balance, Allura adds, "I'll see you at dinner."

Relief fills her when the governess smiles at her then leaves the room. Looking back into her vanity, Allura places a hand on her upset stomach as she considers how ill she has been feeling lately. The door to her room opening draws her mind away from her musings. Glancing behind her, she finds Romelle entering the room. Moving away from the vanity, Allura manages a smile for her cousin as she takes in her appearance, "You look nice."

"As do you," she replies as Romelle's eyes move over her. Both women wear dresses with their hair falling down their back. Whereas, Allura's dress is the customary pink one, Romelle is wearing a green A-line dress that Sven had talked her into having made before their trip to Arus. Finishing looking her cousin over, concern fills her over Allura's pale features, but Romelle chooses to let it go as she continues, "Sven is waiting to escort us to the dining room."

Nodding to her, Allura walks across the room, "Let's go then."

Resisting the urge to question her cousin over her appearance, Romelle forces a smile onto her face, "Very well," and the two women walk out of the room together.

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Thirty minutes later, dinner is a very festive affair with everyone in high spirits. Nanny had outdone herself on the meal, leaving everyone full and half-asleep by the end of dessert. Placing his fork on his empty plate, Keith looks about the room. Hunk and Pidge are leaning back in their seats, rubbing their full bellies while talking. Romelle and Sven are whispering quietly together, a smile on their faces. His eyes move over to Christine, who is holding up a fork with the last bite of dessert from her plate for her husband. Lance leans over to take it, his lips moving over the fork as he winks at her.

Leaning back into his own seat, Keith glances sideways at Beth. She wipes her mouth with her napkin then places it back onto her plate. Turning towards him with a smile forming on her face, she places a hand on his arm, "Everything all right?"

"I'm fine…if a little sleepy." Patting his own stomach, Keith adds, "I definitely ate a little too much."

Reaching out, he cups Beth's cheek, smiling at her. Sensing someone is watching them, Keith looks over to find Allura staring at them. Her cheeks redden as she turns away, saying something to Romelle to gain her cousin's attention. Suddenly feeling uncomfortable, Keith sits up then clears his throat to gain everyone's attention, "Let's head for the rec room before we all fall asleep in here."

Rising from his chair, he helps Beth to stand then glances around as everyone else stands as well. As if unable to help himself, his eyes drift back over to Allura. Her face seems pale under the dining room lights as Hunk pulls back her chair in an effort to help her stand. Beth's hand falling against his chest as she settles against his side draws his attention back. Looking down into her concerned eyes, he listens to her ask, "Are you sure you're all right? You seem very distracted."

Smiling, Keith tilts his head to kiss her forehead, "I'm fine." Wrapping his arm around her waist, he begins to lead them to the door, "I'm kind of excited actually…" Turning his head to find an inquisitive look in her eyes, he finishes, "I think you will like your Christmas gift."

As they walk down the hallway together, Keith listens to the low hum of conversation flowing around him. He tightens his hold on Beth's waist as they near the rec room. Entering together, he listens to the delighted exclamations coming from Beth and Christine as they examine the decorations in the room.

A smile lights up his face as he watches Lance pull his wife under the mistletoe with the declaration, "This is my favorite part of Christmas!" He kisses her soundly to the sound of laughter and applause of the others. Taking Beth's hand, he leads her over to the couch and sits down beside her. His eyes move over the rest of the crowd as they take their seats.

"Why did Lance kiss Christine under that strange plant? I don't understand…"

Turning his attention back to her, Keith explains, "It's an old tradition on Earth. Mistletoe," he points to the plant hanging from the ceiling, "is used to decorate at Christmas. When a man and women meet under it, they kiss, it is considered good luck."

Her eyes narrow on him, "So why didn't you pull me under it?"

Laughing, Keith pulls her to him and kisses her soundly. When she pulls back breathless a moment later, he whispers, "I don't need a hanging plant to have an excuse to kiss you," then winks at her.

"Hey! Get a bedroom!"

Keith turns to Lance, finding him still under the mistletoe with Christine and retorts, "You should talk!" Rolling his eyes, he turns his attention back to his girlfriend.

Smiling unrepentantly, Lance pulls his wife closer to him to kiss her once more before they laughingly move across the room to find their seats. Sitting down then pulling Christine down next to him, he calls out to the youngest member of the group, "Hey Pidge, why don't you play Santa Claus and start handing out gifts?"

Across the room, Allura sits on the couch beside Romelle and Sven, smiling at Lance's antics. '_He has really become a different person since marrying Christine…_' she thinks. Her gaze shifts to Keith, who is whispering in Beth's ear and the smile leaves her face as a becoming blush crosses the other woman's cheeks. She looks away, her hands moving up to her cheek to wipe at the single tear that managed to escape. "Here, Princess."

Looking up, she forces a smile on her face for Pidge as he holds out a gift to her from him and Hunk. "Thank you."

He nods to her then goes back under the tree, picking up more packages and delivering one to Romelle before moving across the room to hand one to Beth. Holding her gift in her hands without opening it, she watches as Pidge continues to take gifts from under the tree and passing them around to the different people in the room.

"Look Allura, isn't it beautiful?"

Romelle interrupts her thoughts as she holds out a beautiful bracelet that Sven has given her for her to see. Smiling over at Sven, Allura compliments, "Fabulous choice."

He winks back at her then leans over to kiss his wife. Allura looks back across the room as Beth cries out, "Oh Keith!"

She finds Keith smiling at the expression on his girlfriend's face as she looks at the ring that was his gift to her. Taking it from her, he bends down on one knee in front of her then asks, "Marry me?"

Beth falls into Keith's arms, kissing him, "Yes, yes, yes!"

Everyone stands up and surrounds the couple with Lance exclaiming, "It's about time!" as congratulations continue to flow to the newly engaged couple. Turning away from the scene, Allura slowly tries to make her way to the door through the blur of the tears in her eyes. She pauses by a table as she becomes dizzy then the world goes dark as she falls to the floor.

"ALLURA!"

Romelle's shout turns every head in the room as she kneels on the floor beside her unconscious cousin. Sven moves quickly beside her, bends down, picks up Allura then races out of the room with her, taking her to MedTech.


	6. Chapter 6

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 6

An hour later, the group sits around waiting for Dr. Gorma. Sitting next to Beth, the commander watches Coran as he paces impatiently around the room. The older man looks up at the clock again then resumes his pacing. Looking at the other occupants of the room, Keith finds Hunk and Pidge whispering quietly together. Nanny sits anxiously in one chair, her gaze never leaving the exam room door. Christine lies asleep against Lance's shoulder, his arm around her to keep her steady. Their gazes meet with Lance grimacing before laying his head against his wife's. Moving on, Keith finally looks over at Sven and Romelle. Holding her husband's hand tightly in hers, Romelle keeps switching her worried gaze from Coran to Nanny then back to the exam room door.

The feeling of Beth's head coming to rest against his shoulder brings his attention back to his fiancée. Turning his head, he listens to her breathing deepening as if in sleep. Kissing the top of her head, Keith sighs to himself, _'This was not how I thought our evening would end…'_

"That's it…"

Looking over, Keith finds Coran walking down the hall, as if planning on breaking into the exam room when Dr. Gorma suddenly walks out. The doctor stops, his eyes on the advisor before gesturing him to follow him. As they pass, he signals to Nanny, Sven and Romelle to follow them as well, leaving the rest to remain waiting. He leads them into his office, pressing the button to close the door behind them. Sitting behind his desk, the doctor rubs his tired eyes. Irritated with the continued wait, Coran exclaims, "What is it Dr. Gorma? What's wrong with the princess?"

Finally looking up at the group, he clears his throat then answers, "Nothing is wrong per se…the princess is pregnant."

The advisor's exclamation of "WHAT!" could be heard in the waiting room. Sven wraps his arm around Romelle to steady her as she wavers unsteadily and Nanny falls on the floor after missing the chair. His face red with rage, Coran turns to leave the room only stopping when Dr. Gorma loudly says his name, "Coran, I can't allow you to go near the princess right now. You are upset and you will only upset her more than she already is, which isn't a good thing right now."

Ignoring the doctor, he turns to leave again only stopping when Sven grabs his arm. He tries to reason with him, "Coran, he's right…" Sven glances at his wife, "Let Romelle go talk to her. Allura may tell her things that she won't tell you."

Glaring at him, the advisor rips his arm away from him. He snarls, "Fine, I'll be in my office," then storms out of the room.

Romelle finally finds her voice, "Dr. Gorma, how far along is she?"

Looking over at her, he answers, "The princess refused to answer my questions about her last period." He sits back in his chair and sighs, "In fact, she refused to say anything. Based on my examination, I'm guessing two to three months. I'll know more when I do an ultrasound."

Nodding to him, Romelle leaves the room with Sven. She looks at the confused faces in front of her then instructs her husband, "Tell them, it isn't like she can hide it," before walking toward Allura's room.

"Sven, what the hell is going on?"

Turning his attention away from his departing wife, Sven looks over to find Lance's anxious expression as he adds, "We heard Coran yell out here! Then he stormed out of here, wouldn't answer our questions!"

Glancing around at the anxious expressions around the room, Sven's gaze finally settles on Keith as he says, "Allura is pregnant."

"What the fuck!"

"How?"

"By who?"

Ignoring the questions, Sven takes in the commander's astounded expression as his gaze moves down the hall to the door where the princess rests. When Keith's horrified gaze comes back to him, Sven answers, "I don't know anything beyond that. Romelle went to go talk to her."

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Entering the room, Romelle finds her cousin curled into a ball, facing away from the door. She walks around the bed and sits beside her, speaking softly, "Allura?"

Digging her fingers into her pillow, Allura does not look at her cousin as the tears continue down her face. Romelle wipes the moisture from her cheeks, "Sweetheart, you can talk to me…you know I would never judge you."

When Allura's eyes finally meet her cousin's, a sob escapes her and she covers her face with her hands. Lying down on the bed beside her, Romelle hugs her. Trying to keep her tone even, she carefully asks, "Were you raped?"

She sighs with relief when she hears a mumbled, "No."

Rubbing her back, the princess quietly inquires, "Who is the father?"

When she does not answer, Romelle asks again, only to be answered with a quiet sniffle. Frustrated, she snaps, "You can't protect him, Allura."

Another sniffle echoes in her ears, causing Romelle to pull back so she can see her cousin's face. Watching her closely for reaction, she asks, "Was it Prince Ty?"

Shaking her head, Allura closes her eyes against her cousin's probing gaze. Soft fingers grazing her cheek affectionately has her reopening her eyes. She finds a sad expression on Romelle's face as she says, "I hope you love the man, Allura. You know Coran is going to demand you tell him who the father is and you will have to marry him."

Allura shudders as she draws in breath to respond, "He's not available to marry…"

Horrified, Romelle asks, "Is he already married?"

Closing her eyes again, Allura shakes her head then pushes her face into her pillow. Frustrated, Romelle continues to push, "Is he dead?"

Sucking in a sobbing breath, Allura gives a short shake of her head. She becomes quiet as she turns her face into the pillow to tune out Romelle's questions. Sitting up, Romelle forces her cousin's chin up until her eyes reopen to look up at her. Anger singes her tone as she states, "Allura, you have to give up his name…"

Pulling her chin away from Romelle's hand, determination mixed with defiance enters Allura's eyes as she retorts, "No, I will not."

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A short time later, Romelle exits the room and wanders back down to the waiting room. After her last statement, Allura had refused to say another word and no amount of pushing or pleading had helped. Reaching the waiting room, she looks around. The only people left are Sven and Keith. Her husband holds a hand out to her and she tiredly walks over to him, letting him pull her down onto his lap, his arms moving around her. Moving her head to his shoulder, Romelle closes her eyes with a sigh.

Keith does not acknowledge the intimacy but asks, "Was she raped?"

Opening her eyes, Romelle sits up from Sven's embrace to face him, "No, she claims she wasn't, but she won't tell me who the father is either. The only thing she would tell me about him is 'he's not available to marry'."

Confused, Sven retorts, "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Shaking her head, the princess replies, "You tell me and we will both know. Whoever he is, Allura is determined to protect him." She moves from Sven's lap to the chair next to him, "I can't believe she had premarital sex with someone. That just isn't like her."

Groaning as he runs his hand through his hair, Keith sits back in his chair, "Coran is going to have a field day with this…"

Sven looks over at his friend, his tone wry, "You are going to have to request a new pilot for Blue lion, Keith."

Moving his hands to his eyes, Keith pushes in on them as he replies, "When I grounded her I didn't think it was going to be permanent." He sighs as he drops his hands to look back at him, "You're right though…I'll call Admiral Graham in the morning and request a new pilot."

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The next morning in MedTech, Allura sits up in bed sipping juice as Coran enters the room. She freezes, her eyes following him as he moves over to the chair next to the bed and sits down. Settling into the chair, the advisor nonchalantly crosses his arms and ankles. He clears his throat before his sharp gaze finally comes to rest on her. His tone is deceptively calm as he asks, "Who is the father?"

She looks at him briefly then away, refusing to answer him. Unable to restrain his fury any longer, Coran's face turns red. Moving faster than anyone could have predicted, he stands up, reaches across the bed and grabs her arm. Rage flows from him as he snarls, "Allura, you are a princess of Arus, not some common peasant. Princesses do not have children out of wedlock. You will tell me who the father is and you will marry him before this baby is born."

Pulling her arm away from the advisor, Allura snaps, "No, Coran. I'm sure you already spoke to Romelle. The father is not available to marry." Determination shines in her eyes as she finishes, "I will say no more on the subject."

Coran glares at her, raising his voice, "There will be plenty to say on the subject, young lady, as your subjects hear of this pregnancy and your lack of marriage. You want your child born a bastard?"

Returning the glare, she snarls, "My child will be the next king or queen of Arus...no one will dare call my child that disgusting name!"

Reaching down, Coran grabs the princess by her upper arms, almost yanking her out of the bed as he starts yelling, "You are assuming there will still be a throne to ascend!"

The door to the room opens suddenly revealing the commander. Moving into the room, with his arms up as if ready to fight, Keith carefully instructs, "Coran, release Princess Allura now and leave the room."

Disgusted, Coran lets her go then glares at the commander before storming out of the room. Keith watches the door close and shakes his head before facing the princess. His eyes move over her in an assessing way as he asks, "Are you all right?"

Nodding, Allura looks away from him as she wipes at the tears on her face while settling back onto the bed. Moving across the room, Keith takes the chair previously occupied by Coran. Settling into it, he watches her for a moment as she stares intently down at her blanket. Keeping his tone calm, he inquires, "I have to ask, Princess. Were you raped?"

Her eyes finally leave the blanket to snap to his face, "No."

Sighing in relief, he smiles softly, "I know Romelle asked last night but I had to be sure."

Lying back against her pillows, Allura studies him closely. After a moment, she is unable to resist asking, "What would you have done if I were?"

The smile leaves his face as Keith's eyes become very dangerous, "Hunt the bastard down and kill him."

Shaking her head ruefully at him, Allura lays her head back and closes her eyes. Keith waits for her to look at him again, but when she does not, reaches forward to grasp her hand, "Why won't you tell anyone who the father is?"

Finally reopening her eyes, Allura pleads with him, "Please Keith, don't ask…"

"Allura, the father has a right to know about the baby," he replies as he releases her hand and sits back in his chair.

Closing her eyes against the tears she feels forming, she turns away from him, "I…can't, Keith…"

"Do you love him?"

His quiet question has her turning back to face him. Tears run freely down her cheeks as she answers, "Yes."

Keith nods, his expression showing nothing of his thoughts, "Does he love you?"

"I…I…wanted him…to," the princess responds back while trying to hold back sobs. She can briefly see anger in his eyes then he simply nods to her.

Giving up on the subject, the commander sighs, "Princess, I feel you need to know that I called Galaxy Garrison this morning and requested a new permanent pilot for Blue lion."

Allura's eyes widen in shock as she stares at him. Feeling like a jerk, Keith watches even more tears sliding down her cheeks. Taking a deep breath, he tries to reason with her, "Princess, you can't fly and risk the baby." At the devastated looking on her face, he tries to give her some hope, "After the baby is born, we can discuss your being a backup pilot if that is what you really want. It's just too dangerous to risk leaving your child without a parent to let you fly all the time, Princess."

Closing her eyes while trying to stop herself from sobbing, Allura looks away from him again. Turning away from him on the bed, she lies on her side to face the other wall. Shaking his head as the sound of her sobs reaches him, Keith whispers, "I'm sorry," stands and leaves the room.

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That afternoon, Keith sits in the rec room with Beth. Curled up together on the couch, they watch a movie. Given the events of the day, he is barely paying attention to the screen. Instead, his mind is going over his earlier conversation with the princess. While the others cannot believe she had sex with someone before getting married, he can, especially if she believed herself in love with the man. He only wished he could track the jerk down for the damage he has caused. Allura alone will be suffering the consequences and that enraged him. Beth's hand moving along his chest draws his attention back to her. He listens to her sigh dramatically before she shifts in his arms to turn toward him. She smiles softly as she asks, "So did Princess Allura say who the father is yet?"

Gazing into her eyes, Keith gives a brief shake of his head before returning his attention to the screen.

Releasing another sigh, she runs her fingers along his chest, "There is going to be hell to pay when the news gets out to the people. She will be lucky to keep her throne."

Keith continues to say nothing but Beth fails to notice his jaw tightening in anger. She continues to play with his shirt, loosening a button and teasing the skin underneath as she adds, "I wonder if the baby will even be allowed the title of prince or princess?"

Pulling her hand away from his chest, Keith sits up, forcing her to move away from him. Confused, Beth looks up at him as she starts to ask, "What's wrong?" Finally noticing the anger in his eyes, she flinches inwardly.

Glaring at her, Keith snaps, "We are not going to have this conversation again, Beth. Princess Allura has given everything to this planet to keep it safe. She deserves respect from you and respect from the people, regardless of any personal mistakes she may have made. Do I make myself clear?"

Nodding wordlessly, Beth watches her fiancé rise from the couch as he says, "I need to get some work done. I'll see you at dinner," then he leaves the room.

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Walking down the hall, Keith takes deep breaths while trying to get over his anger with Beth. _'She won't be the last person to judge the princess for her mistake…'_ He does not acknowledge Lance as he passes him in the hallway then enters his office, stopping in front of the desk. Balling his hands into fists, he continues to try to calm down. He turns as the door opens to find Lance entering the room, his eyebrow arching at him, "Since when did you start snubbing people?"

Rolling his eyes in answer, the commander walks around his desk. Sitting down in the seat, he watches Lance park himself in the chair in front, "Come on Keith, something has you pissed off. What is it?"

Keith stares down at his desk for a moment as he remembers the conversation then sighs as he looks up again to explain, "Beth made some comments about Princess that upset me."

"Ahhh….yeah…" Lance shifts uncomfortably in his chair, "Happily, Christine is wise enough to keep whatever she thinks of this situation to herself." He clears his throat, "I take it the comments caused an argument?"

Arching an eyebrow at his friend, the commander snorts, "Not exactly…but I did say a few words to Beth that may have come across as harsh."

Lance smiles at him, "Well, as long as it is something you can apologize for later…" stopping as Keith makes a noise, "…something you won't be apologizing for?"

Shaking his head, he answers, "No, if Beth is going to live here then she needs to understand that her loyalty needs to be with Princess. I won't apologize for telling her that."

Nodding, the lieutenant clears his throat to ask, "Heard you spoke with Allura earlier. Did she say anything to you about who the father is?"

Deciding not to reveal what the princess had told him about the father, Keith shakes his head again. Arching an eyebrow at his friend, he remarks, "I'm surprised you haven't tried talking to her yet. I seem to recall she liked to tell you her secrets."

Grimacing, Lance snorts, "At Coran's behest, I tried about a half hour after you left. She shut me down in about five seconds flat with 'I'm not saying, so quit asking.'." He leans forward in his chair, "When I told Coran she wouldn't tell me anything, he threw a glass he was holding against a wall, shattering it."

Disgusted, Keith shakes his head. He looks back across the desk as Lance quietly admits, "I can't believe Allura had sex with someone. That just isn't like her…" his expression turns wry, "…that and Nanny watches her like a hawk! When could she have snuck out?"

Before Keith can comment, the door to his office opens again and Nanny comes running in, "Commander! I've been looking all over for you!"

Both men stand and Keith grabs the governess' arms when she reaches him, "Nanny, what's wrong?"

The older woman pauses, trying to catch her breath, "You need to…come help Princess!" She manages to continue, "Coran called a meeting of the council elders to inform them of the pregnancy. They are talking about stripping her of her crown! She was taken from MedTech to stand before them!"

Lance swears as Keith's jaw tightens in anger. He looks at his friend to order, "Get everyone together quick and grab Romelle and Sven, we may need them. Meet me outside the chambers."

Nodding to him, Lance runs out of the room. Keith looks back at the governess, "I'll do what I can, Nanny," as he pulls away from her and leaves the room.

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Standing in the center of the council chambers, Princess Allura tries to maintain her calm, "Please listen to me! This child has nothing to do with my ability to rule this planet."

Her eyes move over the men in the room, all staring down at her in condemnation. An elder stands and points his finger at her, "It has everything to do with your ability to lead and rule, Princess. Your poor decision making with regards to having physical relations with some unknown man outside of marriage is very distressing…a man you will not name and claim you cannot marry."

Before Allura can reply the doors to the chambers open and Keith enters the room, followed by the entire Voltron Force and Romelle. Coran stands, holding up his hand as if to stop them, "Commander, you and the Force are not invited to this meeting. Please leave at once."

Keith reaches Allura, who looks at him a bit shocked as he takes her hand. He manages a quick smile for her then faces the chamber to declare, "If this meeting is to decide whether Princess Allura maintains her crown then it involves the Force and I directly. We will not be left out of it."

His hand drops as Coran glares at him. Another council member stands, "You have no say in whether Princess Allura will maintain her crown."

Turning to face the man, Keith glares at him, "Princess Allura has risked everything for the last two years to keep this planet safe. While you hid in your tunnels, she fought by our side in the lions! She risked her very life to keep yours safe and because of one mistake…a personal mistake that any man or woman could make…you are going to strip her of her throne?"

Another man stands, his face red with fury, "How dare you!"

Turning to face him, Keith snarls, "I dare because this council cannot see past its own foolish views of morality." He squeezes Allura's hand once more before releasing it and steps forward. "Let me make my views very clear to each of you." He turns around the room, looking each member in the eye then stopping in front of Coran. Staring intently at him, he states, "I fully believe in Princess Allura's ability to rule Arus. Her decisions regarding Arus have thus far been unquestionable. She is human like the rest of us, not perfect and prone to the occasional mistake. If you take her throne from her based on this one mistake, I will step down as the Commander of the Voltron Force and will no longer fly to keep this planet safe."

As the advisor's eyes widen in shock, Lance steps forward to add, "And the commander will not be alone." He glances back as each member of the Force moves forward to stand beside him, a grim look on each man's face.

Tears fill Allura's eyes as her friends defend her. She looks over as another council member stands, "You would leave us undefended in an attack?"

Turning his gaze toward the man, Keith retorts, "No sir, if you remove Princess Allura from the throne, it is you who will be leaving this world undefended."

Moving around the group, Romelle takes her cousin's hand next as she faces the council members, "That is not the only threat you will face, gentlemen." Sven moves forward and takes his wife's other hand as she faces the group, "Planet Pollux will remove itself from our alliance with Planet Arus should you choose to dethrone Allura. You will stand alone against the threat of Planet Doom."

Voices erupt in the chamber as all the council members stand and begin talking at once. Keith stands still and silent, his gaze never leaving the advisor's as Coran picks up a hammer and calls order to the session. He turns furiously away from Keith to look at the members, "A vote sirs. Raise your hand if you wish Princess Allura to maintain her throne."

Every member of the council slowly raises their hand as Coran looks around the room. He turns back toward Allura, "The council of elders has spoken. You will remain Princess of Arus."

Keith smiles at him, "A wise decision." Coran glares at him as the commander turns, takes Allura's elbow and escorts her out of the room, followed by the others. As they walk out the door, they find Nanny standing there wringing her hands together. Keith smiles at her as the doors to the chamber close, "It's all right Nanny…she is still the princess."

The governess rushes forward, hugs her charge then turns and walks away. Allura looks at Keith and the others in appreciation, smiling at them through the tears blurring her sight, "Thank you."

Smiling at her, Keith nods, "You are welcome, Princess." She rushes him and hugs him. He stiffens for a moment then wraps his arms around her, returning the hug. Releasing him after a moment, Allura turns and hugs each of the others as well before facing them again. Wiping at the tears on her cheeks, she asks, "What would I do without all of you?"

A bright smile crosses Lance's expression as he answers, "May you never find out, Princess." He continues to smile at her as he takes her elbow, leading her down the hall, "So, if you have a boy…who are you going to name him after?" causing the rest of the group to all start laughing as they follow.

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Having skipped dinner, Coran sits in a wing-backed chair in front of the fireplace in his room. Picking up a glass off the side table, he sips the amber liquid while staring blindly at the flames. His head turns when he hears a knock at the door. Setting the glass down, he calls out, "Enter."

The door opens to reveal Sven. The Norwegian eyes him for a minute then gestures to the second chair, "May I?"

Picking up his glass again, Coran snorts, "This isn't a social call, is it?" then takes a sip.

A grim smile crosses Sven's face before he gives a short shake of his head, "No, Romelle has some reservations about how you've been acting toward Allura."

"Exactly how do you think I've been acting?" the advisor asks as he swirls the amber liquid around in his glass.

"Cold."

'_A simple answer really…'_ Coran thinks as he looks across at the other man. Shrugging with feigned indifference, the advisor informs him, "I effectively raised Allura since she was eight years old," suddenly anger tinges his tone, "…to say I am disappointed in the events of the last two days is an understatement."

Sven eyes him for a moment then nods in understanding. He watches Coran turn in his chair to stare at the fire once more. Watching him closely, he finally asks, "But is that enough reason to try to strip her throne from her?"

His head turns back to him sharply as Coran snaps, "Is that what you think I did?"

"You stood in front of the Council and said nothing in Allura's defense," replies Sven quietly, his eyes still studying the older man.

Standing up abruptly, Coran snarls, "I spent two hours arguing with them before they sent for her." His nostrils flare with anger as he continues, "I was reminded that my job as the princess' advisor did not give me any right to make demands of the Council or how they would handle the situation. I was ordered to do my duty, which was to direct the meeting and no more." He throws his glass down into the fireplace, "Do not sit there and presume that I don't care what happens to Allura. I did not spend the last twelve years of my life keeping her safe and teaching her how to rule only to throw her to the wolves!"

A bright smile crosses Sven's face as he stands, "That's all Romelle and I wanted to know."

Coran glares at him, "Does Romelle know who the father is and is helping Allura by not saying?"

Shaking his head, the Norwegian answers, "No, Allura refused to divulge the information…even to Romelle."

"Allura needs to marry the father of that child!" Coran snaps, "The Council may have conceded to the commander's demands, but that doesn't mean the people will!"

Sighing deeply, Sven nods, "I know." Moving toward the door, he reminds him, "Just be happy that Allura is healthy and capable of taking care of this child. That's more than some people on this planet have right now."

Snorting in answer, Coran drops back into his chair, staring at the flames once more as the door closes behind his visitor.


	7. Chapter 7

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 7

Two weeks later, the Force is on the tarmac as the shuttle from Earth lands. Keith watches the shuttle door opening then studies the young man who steps out and walks toward them. He is shorter than Keith, with a muscular, wiry build. His hair is red and his eyes green, showing his Irish background. Overall, he would be considered a handsome man. Keith wants to run his hand through his hair in exasperation as he thinks, _'Don't tell me I'm going to have to warn the maids…'_ An easy smile crosses the man's face as he stops in front of Keith and salutes him with an Irish lilt, "Private Michael Damien, reporting for duty, sir!"

Arching an eyebrow at his excited tone, the commander states, "At ease, Michael. We don't stand on ceremony here."

Inside the castle, Allura stands by a window watching Keith address the young man then turns to introduce the rest of the Force. A tear runs down her cheek as she places her hand on her abdomen. She feels arms coming around her and startles, then relaxes when she sees her cousin's reflection in the glass. Romelle lays her chin on Allura's shoulder as she hugs her from behind. Her tone is quiet as she asks, "Are you all right?"

Managing a nod, Allura turns sideways away from the window and the view below, to face her cousin. Romelle steps back as she watches Allura wipe at her cheeks, "I'm fine. Just…sad." Her gaze once again turns toward the window and the scene below as the men begin walking into the castle.

Glancing down on the tarmac as the last of the men enter the castle, Romelle says, "You understand why Keith requested a new pilot though?"

Wiping at her nose as she sniffles, Allura nods sadly, "I always knew the day would come when I wouldn't be allowed to fly anymore…"

Reaching out, Romelle rubs her arm, "In return you will have a child to love…"

Turning her sad eyes turn toward her cousin, Allura's hand once again drifts to her abdomen. Romelle tries to smile at her, "It isn't like you can't ever fly again. I'm sure after the baby is born, Keith would have no problem with you taking Blue out."

Nodding, Allura turns her face away to once again look out the window. Even though no one was out there any longer, her gaze stays on the shuttle. She finally whispers, "But it won't ever be the same…" as tears run down her cheeks.

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Later that night, Keith escorts Beth down the hall toward the dining room for dinner. Looking her fiancé over, she notices the worry lines around his eyes and mouth. Reaching over, Beth touches his cheek, "What's wrong?"

Switching his gaze to meet hers, Keith attempts to smile at her, "I'm fine Beth…just a bit worried." He tightens his grip on her hand and continues down the hall. She sighs, "Keith, please do not try to block everything from me. If we are going to marry, I want you share your problems with me."

Sighing, Keith stops their movement down the hall to face her, "Beth, between trying to ascertain whether Michael will be able to handle the stress of combat in the lions while at the same time, trying to be sensitive to Allura's feelings…" He runs his hand through his hair in agitation, "I don't know how this is all going to work out."

Beth touches his cheek reassuringly, "Surely Princess doesn't mind giving up flying for her baby…"

His gaze turns incredulous, "You really don't know Princess Allura very well. She is devastated by the loss of her place on the Force. I had to warn Michael to be very careful about what he says to her since he is taking her place."

Confused, she asks, "She misses Planet Doom trying to kill her while she was flying Blue lion?"

Grimacing, Keith shakes his head at her, "You're not a pilot Beth, you don't understand…" he takes her hand again and starts walking toward the dining room once more. They enter the room and Keith's gaze moves around, taking in everyone's location. Hunk and Pidge are standing with Michael by the window, talking. Sven, Romelle, Christine and Lance are standing near the table having a discussion while Princess Allura sits at the table alone. Keith's gaze stays on the princess briefly, disturbed by the sad expression on her face as she stares at Michael.

He turns away from the table as Michael steps away from Hunk and Pidge to approach him, "Good evening, Captain Kogane."

Gritting his teeth, Keith reminds him, "Michael, I have asked you to refrain from using titles." He gestures to the woman on his arm, "This is my fiancée, Beth." Turning to his fiancée, he finishes, "Beth, this is Michael Damien, the new pilot for Blue lion."

Turning his attention to Beth for the first time, Michael stops breathing for a moment as he looks her over. Before him stands one of the most stunning women he has ever seen. Finally remembering himself, he manages a smile, "Hello," then holds his hand out for her to shake.

Beth's smile falters briefly as she looks into Michael's face. Her heart rate rises as she takes in the ruggedly handsome man in front of her. Quickly recovering, she reaches out to shake his hand, notes the warmth and strength in his hand then quickly pulls away. Keith looks at the two of them a bit oddly then brushes it off to escort Beth to their places at the table.

Moving to an empty place next to Pidge, Michael sits down slowly, his eyes moving over to the commander's fiancée once more as he thinks, _'Why are all the good ones always taken?'_

He feels an elbow in his side and turns to find the lieutenant staring at him, a wry look to his eyes, "Seeing something you like?"

Shrugging nonchalantly, Michael picks up his napkin and places it on his lap, "Nope, just trying to figure everyone out."

Sitting back in his seat, Lance glances over at Keith and Beth once more then shrugs, "Yeah, I suppose walking into a new situation…a smart man would do that."

Nodding to him, Michael turns his attention to the plate being placed before him by one of the servants. As everyone begins eating around him, he cannot help glancing at the fiancée of the commander from time to time while wondering how he will get through his assignment on Arus.

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Having declined dessert, Beth sits back in her chair looking about the table as everyone else finishes eating. Her gaze moves down to the new pilot and that flutter she felt earlier returns. When she first met Keith, she had felt attracted to him, but nothing like what is going through her now. _'What am I thinking? I love Keith…I'm going to marry him!'_ Determined to ignore the new pilot, she turns her body towards her fiancé. As he puts his fork down, Beth places a hand on his knee. When he turns toward her, she smiles, "Let's not go to the rec room tonight…let's go spend some time alone together instead."

Smiling regretfully, Keith shakes her head, "I need to meet with Sven and Romelle quick." At the disappointed look on her face, he leans in kiss her cheek, "I'll make it up to you tomorrow, I promise."

Across the table, Michael watches the commander smile then kiss Beth. The sudden need to move across the room and rip her away from him flies through him. Ignoring the feeling, he looks back down at the table as he reminds himself, _'That's the commander's fiancée…what the hell is wrong with me?'_

The sound of chairs moving back brings his attention back to the activities in the room. As everyone begins rising, Michael stands then glances at Pidge to ask, "What now?"

The youngest member of the Force smiles at him, "Usually we retire to the recreation room, or rec room for short, to watch a movie or play cards, whatever we feel like."

He nods to him then glances over as Keith announces, "We will say good night."

Looking across the room, Michael watches the commander wrap an arm around Beth's waist as he leads her from the room. Ignoring the sharp blade of jealousy that shoots through him, he looks across the room to find Princess Allura studying him sadly. His troubles abandoning him for the moment, he nods respectfully to her only to watch her turn abruptly away. She says a quiet good night to the remaining occupants then quickly leaves the room as well, followed by Sven and Romelle. A hand comes to rest on his shoulder. Turning to look at the owner, he finds Lance smiling at him, "Don't take it personally. Allura's having a hard time with losing Blue lion."

"Yeah, I know. Keith warned me about it earlier," explains Michael as he runs a hand through his hair, "I still feel like shit about it though."

Lance slaps him on the back, "It'll work out. Let's get to the rec room. I think the way a man plays poker tells a lot about him. Let's find out if you're a man…or a pussy."

Listening to the groans of Pidge and Hunk, a bright smile crosses Michael's face, "You're going to regret that…"

"I'm counting on it!" exclaims the lieutenant as his wife rolls her eyes beside him. She interrupts, "I'll say good night then." Christine leans up on his toes to kiss Lance's cheek, whispers, "Have fun," then turns away to leave the room.

Rubbing his hands together excitedly, Lance exclaims, "Let's go then!" and leads the way out of the dining room.

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Reaching the room that is hers until their marriage, Keith pauses by the door to bid Beth good night. Smiling, he whispers, "Things will be better soon. Once we get Michael up to speed, everything will calm down and we will find more time to spend together." Managing not to squirm at the mention of the new pilot's name, she smiles up at him, "I'm looking forward to it."

Leaning down, Keith kisses her once more then opens the door for her. Smiling at him, Beth walks into the room. Pushing the button to close the door after her, the smile leaves his face. Suddenly feeling exhausted by the day's events, the commander turns around and walks back down the hallway. He reaches the office given to Sven and Romelle to use during their stay to find the couple waiting for him. He sits tiredly down on one of the couches and rubs his weary face with one hand.

Romelle sighs empathetically as she watches him. '_Poor Keith. He really is stuck in the middle of this mess even if he didn't create it.'_ She attempts to smile at him as he finally faces them. Anxious looking, he asks, "How is Princess dealing with Michael's presence?"

Glancing over at Sven for a moment to find him giving her a barely detectable nod, Romelle finally turns back to answer, "Not well. When Sven introduced her to him before dinner, she almost began crying." Pulling at the ribbon on her skirt, she adds, "Allura is very sad. I don't know if you noticed, but she didn't eat much for dinner."

Grimacing, he runs a hand through his hair in agitation, "I noticed, she didn't speak much either."

Sitting forward, Romelle grabs one of his hands. Her eyes plead with him as she states, "Keith, you need to keep her active on the Force."

Confused, Keith pulls his hand away as he retorts, "Romelle, you know she can't fly…"

The princess shakes her head at him. She gestures broadly with her hands as she explains, "I'm not talking about flying the lions, Keith. I'm talking about keeping her on the team as an active member. Have her attend the team meetings, take part in the decisions and whatever else a member of the Force does that doesn't include flying. Allura feels like she is being left behind and is no longer part of the team. She is devastated by it!"

Astounded, Keith stares at the Polluxian princess wordlessly for several moments then shakes his head ruefully, "I must be getting old and losing my mind. I never even gave it a thought to ask her to be at the shuttle this morning when we greeted Michael. She must have seen that as proof that she was no longer part of the team."

Smiling sadly at him, Romelle glances over as Sven clears his throat to gain his friend's attention, "You weren't the only idiot there, Keith. I didn't think of it either until Romelle told me about Allura standing by a window watching us and crying."

Grimacing, the commander looks back at the princess, "I'll rectify that tomorrow, Romelle…I promise."

A bright smile crosses her face as a mischievous thought comes to her. Romelle winks at him, "Good luck having a pregnant and moody princess on the team."

Sven starts laughing as Keith raises an eyebrow at her. His tone is dry as he snorts, "If you are trying to cheer me up you are failing…miserably," causing Romelle to start laughing as well.

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As the months go by, Keith tries to keep Allura feeling like part of the Force by requesting her presence at their meetings and evaluating Michael's progress with her and Sven. During one such meeting, he studies her as Sven discusses some of the quirks of the Blue lion with her. At eight months pregnant, Allura's stomach has protruded out to the point of covering most of her thighs when she sits. He continues to study her subtly as the conversation continues, observing that the pregnancy seems to agree with her, and if possible, has made her even more beautiful. Her sapphire eyes dance with merriment and her cheeks have a rosy hue to them. She rubs her stomach while laughing at Sven's comments about Blue lion seeming to have a developed a female attitude. The Norwegian shakes his head mirthfully at her, "I swear Allura, you turned Blue female! She wasn't half as quirky when I originally flew her as she is now."

Allura smiles, her eyes still dancing with laughter as she retorts, "You just have to learn how to talk to her."

Laughing aloud, Sven snorts, "No I don't! It's Michael that needs to tame that particular lion now…"

Shaking her head at his drollness, the princess slowly tries to rise. Keith stands and helps her to her feet as he asks, "Something wrong?"

She shakes her head and smiles at him, "No, the problem with being pregnant is the frequent need to use the restroom. I'll be right back."

Keith laughs at her as she walks out of the room. He sits back down and faces Sven, who sighs, "At least she is finally smiling again."

Feeling his own smile dimming, Keith replies, "Probably helps that Coran has been forbidden by Dr. Gorma to harangue her about the baby's father. He was stressing her out big time."

Shaking his head as he crosses his arms and ankles together and slouches back on the couch, Sven adds, "God help her if he ever does find out who the father is."

Snorting derisively, the commander retorts, "More like, God help the father."

"Well the only clue we may ever get is the baby itself when it's born. If it looks like the father, maybe we will be able to figure it out," Sven reasons logically.

Nodding in agreement, Keith opens his mouth, but before he can comment further, Allura returns to the room. Just as she is about to return to her seat, she cries out and puts her hand to her side as she falls forward. Keith jumps up quickly and grabs her, "Princess! What's wrong?"

Closing her eyes, Allura draws in ragged breaths as Keith picks her up then lays her down on the couch. Sven and Keith share fearful looks as they stand over her, tears running out of her eyes as she continues to grab at her stomach. Sitting down beside her, the commander grabs her cheek and yells, "Princess!" trying to get her attention.

Allura opens her eyes, looking through the tears at Keith as she whimpers, "Baby…kick…"

His eyebrows shoot up, his face full of concern as he asks for confirmation, "The baby kicked you?"

Nodding, she gasps out, "Lungs…" then cries out and grabs her stomach again. Sven swears in the background as Keith starts rubbing Allura's stomach and speaking calmly to it, "Hey in there…quit being so hard on your poor mother."

Smiling, he feels a thump of a baby's kick against his hand. His eyes drift toward Allura's, "That is quite some kick that child has."

Smiling weakly, the princess murmurs, "You're telling…me…"

Keith laughs softly and continues to rub her stomach while speaking to it. Relieved that things seem to be calming down, Sven moves across from them and sits back down, watching as the color slowly returns to Allura's face. A few minutes later, Keith looks back into her eyes, "Everything calm in there again?"

Feeling her cheeks reddening, Allura nods then slowly sits up, forcing Keith to move to the side so she can turn around. Her tone is almost hollow as she answers, "Yes, thanks Keith. Apparently, baby likes the sound of your voice." She turns toward Sven as he asks, "So how many times have you been kicked like that?"

Grimacing as her hand covers her stomach, she answers, "That was the first, and hopefully, last time."

Sven smiles ironically at her, "I would say that is an understatement."

Grabbing onto the armrest, Allura tries to rise again then pauses when Keith stands to help her. With his hands firmly holding onto hers, he asks, "Is something else wrong?"

Sucking in a deep breath, Allura shakes her head at him then gives him a tremulous smile, "I'm fine Keith…I just feel like I need to go lie down for a while."

His dark eyes probe her still slightly pale face as he inquires, "Need someone to walk you to your room?"

Attempting to relieve his concern, the princess forces her tone to remain steady as she offers a small smile, "No, I'm fine. Thanks for the offer though," then turns away from him and walks out of the room.

Moving back to his seat, Keith sits down with a sigh. Looking over, he finds Sven staring contemplatively at him. "What?"

Shaking his head, Sven answers his friend, "Nothing…"

At the commander's raised eyebrow, he sighs, "Very well, it's just that you seem…very close…to Allura."

"She's my friend Sven, nothing more," answers Keith firmly as he glares at him.

"Is she nothing more?" asks the Norwegian carefully, his shrewd eyes still studying Keith closely. "You do remember what Coran told us when we first arrived here?"

Becoming angry, he snaps, "I'm marrying Beth in June."

Nodding, Sven sighs then apologizes, "I'm sorry. It's just that…I don't think you would have ever helped another pregnant woman the way you helped Allura today, rubbing her stomach, speaking to the baby. It felt too…familiar."

Flushing bright red with embarrassment and anger, Keith retorts, "Allura has no one else to help her! I'm being her friend, nothing more…it doesn't mean anything!"

Deciding to let it go, Sven nods to him then changes the subject back to the lions and Michael.

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Slowly making her way down the hallway, Allura pauses as she nears an open door and hears voices. She looks inside to see Beth standing up on a pedestal as a maid pins up the hem for her wedding dress. Sitting on the bed, Christine watches the proceedings and both girls are laughing as they talk about the wedding plans. Her eyes moving over her friend, Christine sighs, "Keith is going to be astonished when he sees you walking down the aisle to him in that dress."

Staring at her reflection in the mirror beside her, Beth smiles, "I can't wait to see his face." She turns toward her friend to ask, "What did you see when you walked toward Lance?"

Smiling to herself as she remembers that day, Christine explains, "I didn't walk to him. We walked up the aisle together. However, the look in his eyes throughout the entire ceremony was something I can't even begin to describe." Her eyes move back to her friend, "You will know what I mean during your wedding…"

Unable to listen any longer, Allura does not wait to hear Beth's reply. Instead, she continues down the hallway, moving a bit faster while trying to prevent herself from crying until she reaches her room. She fails to notice the hallway's other occupant as she passes by him.

Michael watches her until she disappears down the next corridor. Having seen the watery look to the princess' eyes, he wonders if he should go after her or find one of the others. Given that Allura still does not speak to him any more than she has to, he turns to walk back down the hallway. The sound of the women's voices coming through the open doorway reaches his ears and he pauses.

His mouth drops open at the vision in front of him. Standing up on the pedestal in her mermaid-style wedding dress that forms perfectly to her body with her long brown hair flowing down her back, Beth continues to speak happily to her friend. He knows he should walk away, but no amount of mental arguing seems to get his feet moving. She falls silent and visibly stiffens. Forcing his gaze up, Michael finds her green eyes glaring at him in the mirror. Beth looks away a moment later saying, "I'm feeling a draft. Christine, could you close the door please?"

Only the thought of Lance's wife questioning his presence at the door breaks through the fog of his brain. As Christine stands, Michael quickly moves away from the door and continues his way down the hall.


	8. Chapter 8

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 8

A month later, Allura slowly makes her way down the hall toward her office. She pauses as she turns down the final corridor, finding Keith kissing Beth in front of his office door. She watches him pull away a moment later only to whisper something into his fiancée's ear. As Beth giggles girlishly, he kisses her cheek a final time then pulls away to enter his office. Allura forces herself to move as Beth turns her way and starts down the hallway.

Beth pauses when they meet and manages a smile that does not reach her eyes, "Good morning, Princess. It was a pity you didn't make breakfast this morning."

Returning the smile with an equally insincere one, Allura replies, "I felt it more prudent to rest."

"Yes, I imagine so," murmurs the other woman as her eyes drift over Allura's heavily pregnant form. "Must be exhausting to be pregnant as well as attend to your other duties."

Allura only replies with a nod. She starts to move away then stops when Beth adds, "A pity the father is not around to help you."

She looks back to find a speculative look in Beth's eyes, "I mean…I couldn't imagine having a baby without having Keith there to help me." She smiles brightly at Allura, "I'm so lucky that he loves me. When the time comes for me to become pregnant, I'm sure he will be the prefect help mate."

"Yes…I imagine he will," answers the princess stiffly, "If you will excuse me, I have a lot to do today."

"Oh yes, of course," replies Beth smoothly as she steps aside, "I'm so sorry to have kept you from your work."

Refusing to answer her, Allura walks past her and down the hallway. She can feel Beth's eyes following her until she reaches her office door. Pausing before it, she looks back relieved to find the hallway empty. Feeling tears burning her eyes, she moves away from the doorway and continues down the hallway.

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Satisfaction flows through Beth as she watches the princess walk away. She stares at the other woman for another moment then turns and walks down the hallway away from her. Turning into the next corridor, she pauses when she finds Michael leaning against a wall there with his arms crossed, as if he had been waiting for her. He looks up at her, his eyebrow arched, "Now, was that a nice thing to do?"

"What?" Beth snaps even as she begins walking away from him.

Michael quickly moves away from the wall and keeps pace with her. His Irish accent becomes more pronounced with his irritation, "Rubbing it into the poor woman that you will have a husband to take care of you when you become pregnant while she does not."

"I did no such thing!" she declares as she stops to face him.

Stopping as well, Michael arches his eyebrow at her again, "Oh, then what was that?"

Beth glares at him for a long moment before she snaps, "You wouldn't understand!" Pulling away, she starts back down the hall again.

"What's to understand?" questions Michael as he begins keeping pace with her again.

"She has everything! Beauty, intelligence…a whole damn planet that bows to her feet!" she rattles off then stops suddenly to glare at him, "But she wants what's mine! And I'll be damned if I'll give it up to her!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" snaps the private as he puts his hands on his hips, "What could the princess possibly want of yours?"

"You're an idiot!" retorts Beth before she begins walking down the hall again.

Hot fury runs through him as Michael quickly catches up to her. He grabs her arm to stop her, "I may be many things…stupid is not one of them."

"Could…have…fooled…me," she sarcastically spits out.

He glares angrily into her eyes for what seems like an eternity before his eyes suddenly drop down to her lips. Beth feels a sudden heat building through her body, starting at her toes and racing up until her fingers tingle. She stares up at his lips, noting the full bottom lip just as he starts to lower his head. Pulling away quickly, she snaps, "What do you think you're doing?"

A look of disappointment briefly shines in his eyes but is quickly wiped away as he answers, "Apparently, I am stupider than I thought."

Confused, Beth watches as he quickly turns around and walks away from her. She stares after him for several long moments before forcing herself to continue her way down the hall.

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Several minutes later, Allura enters the garden and makes her way to the center. Sitting down on the bench, Allura stares at the flowers in front of her as she wipes at her eyes. Her mind goes over her conversation with Beth. _'She knows. She always makes sure to touch him when she knows I'm watching as if to prove she owns him.'_ She wipes at an escaping tear that runs down her cheek, _'Why didn't I tell him how I feel before it went this far?'_ Her hand drifts down to rub her stomach as she continues to contemplate, _'I can't say anything to him now…he's so happy.'_ Her brow wrinkles at a twinge she feels in her groin. Ignoring it, Allura thinks, _'Should I tell him and risk losing his friendship? Or should I let it go, let him be happy and be happy for him?'_

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Groaning as he stretches in his office chair, Keith glances at the clock and grimaces, _'Only thirty minutes has gone by? Feels like it should be hours.'_ Standing up, he moves to the window to look out. Noticing how nice of a day it is, he thinks, _'A short walk in the garden then I'll come back and finish that report before lunch.'_

Making his way out of his office, Keith quickly walks down the hall. Sighing with relief when he reaches the gardens without being stopped, he slows his pace. The commander glances around at the flowers as he slowly strolls, enjoying the beautiful blooms. Reaching the center, he notices Princess Allura sitting on a bench. Lost in thought, her hand absently rubs her protruding stomach as she stares at the lovely spring flowers in front of her. Keith studies her, disturbed by the sad look on her face.

Quietly approaching her, he asks, "Princess, are you all right?"

Startled out of her thoughts, Allura glances up at him. Her cheeks turn red as she replies, "I'm fine, Keith," then looks back down at the flowers again.

Having seen the watery look to her eyes, Keith sighs as he sits beside her. He glances sideways at her once more then says, "I promised myself I wouldn't badger you about this again, but does the father even know you're pregnant?"

Refusing to look at him again, she whispers her response, "I don't want to talk about it."

Covering the hand that is resting on her stomach with his, Keith declares, "I'm only trying to be your friend, Princess. This isn't something you should be going through alone. He should be here with you, taking care of you."

Allura's gaze moves from the flowers to his hand before she looks back at him, her sad eyes studying him closely. Keith smiles warmly at her then reaches over to wipe at a single tear that escapes to run down her cheek, "I'm here if you want to talk or need some other help."

Her eyes flood with tears as she starts, "I…I want…" then quickly turns away from him to look back at the flowers. Silently, he waits a moment more until she gives him a slight nod. Resisting the urge to keep pressing her, Keith stands up and starts to walk away, stopping when he hears her gasp. He turns back quickly, "What's wrong?"

His eyes move over her to find Allura's eyes are closed tightly and she is biting her lip, her face white with pain as her hand clutches her stomach. Keith quickly walks back to her, "Are you in labor?"

She does not answer, but reaches up to him with her hand. Taking it, Keith instantly regrets his action when she squeezes his hand hard from the pain. Pulling his communicator off his belt with his free hand, he calls out, "Castle control, come in."

Coran's voice comes across, "Castle control."

Grimacing as Allura squeezes his hand again, he states, "Coran, I'm with Princess Allura in the garden and she just went into labor."

The advisor's tone becomes nervous sounding, "Keith, get her to her room. I'm sending Dr. Gorma there. Control out."

Placing his communicator back on his belt, the commander helps Allura to stand. He tries to pull his hand from her, only for her to grip it even tighter as another pain hits. Gritting his teeth as his fingers continue to be smashed, he says, "Princess, you need to let go of my hand so I can carry you."

She finally releases his hand only to start sinking to the ground from the pain. Keith scoops her up into his arms, holds her close and walks back into the castle. Moving quickly down the hallways, he glances down at the woman in his arms. Her eyes are still closed against the pain as she begins breathing audibly through her mouth. A pained cry escapes her next, leaving Keith feeling completely helpless as he mutters, "Almost there, Allura…Dr. Gorma will help you."

Turning down the hall that leads to her room, he glances back down at her as her cheek comes to rest against his shoulder and she whimpers his name. He looks back up to find Dr. Gorma only steps away from them as they reach the door at the same time. Tightening his hold on her, Keith whispers, "Everything will be all right…" as the doctor opens the door then steps back to allow them to pass. Moving quickly across the room, the commander places her down on the bed. He steps back as Dr. Gorma yells at him, "Out!"

Moving backward toward the door, Keith stares at the scene taking place on the bed as Dr. Gorma sits next to the princess and begins instructing her to breathe as he begins checking her. He feels a hand on his arm next as Nanny says, "We've got this, Commander. Please…"

Giving in, Keith walks out the door and looks back once more, only to have Nanny close the door in his face. Turning away, he finds the advisor rushing toward him. The older man glances at the closed door as a cry from the princess echoes through it and his face pales.

Knowing he cannot stand there and listen while not knowing what is going on, Keith informs him, "I'll go alert the others. We'll be waiting in the rec room for news." He does not wait for Coran's nod or opinion. Instead, he turns around and rushes down the hallway, the sound of the princess' last cry of pain still echoing uncomfortably in his ears as he goes.

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Several hours later, Coran continues to pace the hallway outside of Allura's bedchamber. He had heard the sound of the newborn crying an hour ago, so knows the birth is completed, but is still waiting for Nanny to come tell him he can enter the room. Romelle stands in the hallway against a far wall also waiting. She had come immediately after Keith had given them the news that Allura had gone into labor, but Nanny and Dr. Gorma refused to let her stay with Allura during the delivery.

The door finally opens to reveal a worried looking Nanny. She gestures Coran and Romelle into the room. Coran walks in to find Allura sitting up in the bed, holding her baby. Dr. Gorma glances at them, his expression inscrutable then he goes back to finish putting away his medical kit.

Approaching the bed, Coran looks down on the newborn and instantly looks at Allura enraged. He sits on the bed, glaring at her as he demands, "Is the commander the father of your child?"

Glancing up to meet his angry gaze, Allura recoils from the fury within and looks back to the child sleeping in her arms. She says nothing as she studies the baby, knowing she is the female version of her father…the one thing she has feared would happen since discovering the pregnancy. Nanny approaches and reaches down, taking the baby from her. As the princess cries out her protest, Coran grabs her arm, "Allura, you will answer me. Is Keith the father of that baby?"

Romelle finally looks at the baby in Nanny's arms and looks back up shocked, her eyes going from Allura to Coran. Releasing her arm in disgust when she will not answer, the advisor rises from the bed. He walks over to Nanny, takes the baby and leaves the room, ignoring Allura's shriek as he does so.

Walking quickly over to the bed, Romelle wraps her arms around Allura, who was attempting to get up, and holds her down onto the bed. She looks at Dr. Gorma and Nanny, "Leave us, now!"

Once they leave the room, Romelle looks into the tear stained face of her cousin, "Allura, talk to me…when did you have sex with Keith?"

Allura raises her misery-filled eyes to Romelle as the tears continue to fall and begins speaking.

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Holding the newborn close to him, Coran walks to the rec room where everyone else is waiting. He opens the door and walks into the room as everyone looks up at him in anticipation. Ignoring the questions coming at him as the occupants of the room all rise to their feet, he walks over to the commander and hands him the baby as a bewildered look crosses the man's face.

Utterly confused by the older man's actions, Keith cradles the child against his chest as he stares up at him in question. Coran says nothing as he continues to glare at him. The quiet gurgling sounds the baby makes draws his attention back to her. He looks down, shocking recognition hitting him, and then raises his eyes back to meet Coran's furious gaze as the older man demands, "Something you want to tell me about, Commander?"

Sinking back into his chair while still holding the newborn, Keith looks wordless back at him. Looking from her fiancé to Coran in confusion, Beth finally looks down on the newborn Princess of Arus. Her horrified gaze goes back to Keith as she accuses, "You had sex with Princess Allura?"

With her biting tone finally getting through the fog of his brain, Keith looks up at her in a confused and equally horrified way as he retorts, "No!"

Snorting derisively, Coran snarls, "I think the proof is in your arms, Commander."

Refusing to answer him, Keith looks down in shock at the baby in his arms until Coran reaches down and takes her from him. His tone is biting as he says, "A DNA test will prove it one way or another." Ignoring the sudden cry of the baby, he turns and walks out of the room with her.

Looking up at Beth to find tears running down her cheeks, Keith pleads, "Beth, I swear…" Furious, she slaps him then runs out of the room. Glaring at the commander, Christine quickly leaves Lance's side and follows her friend.

Several minutes go by in astonished silence as the men in the room look to each other before Lance gets out of his chair and approaches Keith, who still looks stunned. Clearing his throat, he angrily asks, "Keith, if you claim you didn't fuck Allura, how in the hell can that baby look just like you?"

The crude question seems to wake him up and the commander's face turns red with sudden fury as he snarls, "I don't know but I'm going to find out." Rising, he pushes past Lance then leaves the room.

Worried about the look in his friend's eyes, Sven turns his gaze to Lance, "We better follow him…this could get ugly." Nodding in answer, Lance turns around and follows him out of the room.

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Astounded, Romelle sits on the bed in stunned silence, staring unbelievably at her cousin as she finishes her explanation. Even though she had just explained it, Romelle cannot help exclaiming, "Allura, how could you do this!"

Unable to answer, Allura falls back on her pillows, tears continuing to run down her cheeks. The door opens and Keith storms into the room. He quickly approaches the bed, fury radiating from him as he yells at her, "What the hell did you do, Allura?"

Closing her eyes, Allura turns away only for Keith to grab her by the arms. He hauls her up out of the bed, physically holding her up in the air and yells in her face, "Answer me, God damn it!"

"KEITH NO!" Romelle yells as she moves across the bed, grabbing at Keith's arms just as Lance and Sven run into the room.

Squeezing her eyes shut against the fury of his gaze, Allura cries out, "You're hurting me!"

Lance and Sven run up to their friend, grabbing his arms, forcing him to let go of Allura. She falls back onto the bed sobbing. Moving next to her, Romelle wrap her arms around her cousin, as if to protect her from Keith, before looking back at the men. Lance and Sven are bodily pushing him back as Keith continues to yell at Allura from across the room, "What did you do?" When she does not answer, he finally pulls away from them and runs out of the room, Lance following.

Watching the closing door, Sven wonders if he should have followed his friend as well. Instead, he turns back to find his wife holding Allura close to her as she continues to cry. Approaching the bed, he asks, "Is she all right?"

Looking down, Romelle lifts the short sleeve of Allura's nightgown to check one of her arms before looking back at her husband to answer, "She may have bruises where he held her but she is fine."

Nodding in reply, Sven finally studies Allura, his own anger rising to the surface until he demands, "What happened?"

Glancing back at him, she notices the fury in his eyes. Taking a deep breath and releasing it, Romelle replies, "Sven, let me calm her down then I will come out and speak to you."

His eyes move over Allura once more as she continues to cling to his wife. Furious at the delay, Sven turns to leave the room. He stops when Romelle calls out to him, "Can you send Nanny and Dr. Gorma back in please?" Turning back, he nods curtly at her then opens the door and walks out.

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Sometime later, Romelle leaves Allura's room in a daze as she thinks of the mess her cousin is in and all the repercussions it will have. As the door closes behind her, she is startled to find Sven leaning against a wall, his arms crossed as if he has been waiting for her there since he left. He looks up at her, arching an eyebrow in question as she approaches him.

Romelle takes his arm and pulls him along down the hall to their bedroom. As they enter, she releases him to move over to the bed, sitting down on it with a sigh as if exhausted. Staring at his wife, Sven moves to sit beside her then pulls her into his arms, hugging her close to him.

Enjoying the feeling of his arms around her, Romelle quietly asks, "How's Keith?"

Snorting in disgust, he replies, "Blind, stinking drunk."

Sitting up, Romelle turns her shocked gaze on her husband as he continues to explain, "After leaving Allura's room, he went to his to find Beth waiting for him. She threw the engagement ring at him and then left. After that, he found a bottle of whiskey and proceeded to drink most of it before Lance and I got it away from him. He's sleeping it off…Lance is staying with him tonight."

Shaking her head sadly at the day's events, Romelle rubs her temples. She finally looks back at her husband when he demands, "What happened Romelle? How did Allura end up pregnant with Keith's child and he has no memory of it?"

Closing her eyes, the princess thinks about explanation she heard earlier. Knowing it will only infuriate Sven more, she looks back as she answers, "She finally told me after Coran left the room with the baby. She drugged him with an aphrodisiac she got from one of the maids. The woman told Allura that the person taking it wouldn't remember anything that happened while it was in his system."

Shocked, Sven stands up from the bed to stare down on his wife, "Drugged him? Why?"

Shaking her head, Romelle replies, "I can't tell you the reasons Sven, but she has them."

Infuriated, he glares at his wife, "Keith has the right to know! Once the DNA test confirms that baby as his, Coran is going to insist he marry her to legitimize the baby. She has ruined his life."

Closing her eyes as tears slide down her cheeks, Romelle wipes at them before looking at him again. "I'm not condoning what she did, Sven, and I know what the repercussions are for Keith. But if he wants the reasons, he is going to have to talk to Allura and she will have to tell him."

"She's no better than Lotor!" snarls Sven as he begins pacing the room.

"What?" asks the princess in shock as she stands up to face him.

Turning back to his wife, Sven yells, "SHE RAPED HIM ROMELLE! SHE JUST TOOK WHAT SHE WANTED! SHE'S NO BETTER THAN LOTOR!"

Growing angry, Romelle retorts, "Do not compare Allura to that monster…she's nothing like him!"

Walking over to his wife, Sven grabs her by the arms as he snarls, "I would think you of all people would recognize rape when you saw it!"

Ripping her arms out of his grip, Romelle slaps him then walks away as she begins to sob. Instantly contrite, Sven walks up to her and wraps his arms around her from behind as he says, "I'm sorry…please Romelle…I just lost my temper…please!"

She turns in his arms, placing her head against his chest as she continues to cry. Holding her close, Sven takes several deep breaths while forcing himself to calm down. Placing a kiss against her forehead, he whispers, "I love you, Romelle. I'm sorry…Allura just made me so angry…"

Pulling back to look up into his face, Romelle sucks in a deep breath as she declares, "She's nothing like Lotor."

Deciding not to argue with her, Sven simply nods then pulls his wife close to him once more.


	9. Chapter 9

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 9

Awakening slowly the next morning, Keith groans at the pounding in his head. Reaching up with one hand, he places a hand on his forehead while turning onto his back. He hears someone moving then hears Lance's voice whispering, "Take these and drink the entire glass of water, Keith."

He opens blurry eyes to see Lance holding aspirin and the water. Sitting up slowly, Keith takes the aspirin, throwing them in his mouth before downing the water. Holding his head between his hands, he lies back against the pillows. As memory of yesterday's events return, he looks over at Lance to ask, "I didn't dream yesterday, did I?"

Shaking his head in answer, Lance turns when he hears a knock at the door. Walking over to the door, he opens it then moves back, letting Sven walk into the room. Sven moves toward the bed to look down on his friend, who rubs his eyes with the fingers of one hand. Dropping his hand, Keith looks up at him pleadingly, "Please tell me those tests came back negative."

Sven closes his eyes briefly, reopening them, he regretfully whispers, "I wish I could my friend. You are the father of Allura's child."

Looking away as both anger and misery fill him, Keith questions, "How?"

Grimacing, he answers, "She drugged you."

Sitting up as shock then rage fills him, Keith stares at his friend, waiting for him to continue.

Lance sits back down on the chair by the desk, looking at them wide eyed as Sven clears his throat before adding, "Before you ask, I don't know the reasons why. Allura apparently told Romelle, but Romelle won't tell me. I did a little investigating this morning and discovered a few things. Allura got the drug, an aphrodisiac, from one of the castle maids. She had the maid slip it into a drink that she gave you the night it happened." At the angry look in his friend's eyes, Sven informs him, "The maid told me a bit more about it. At first, it feels like flu so you went to bed early, keeping everyone away from you. Later that night, Allura slipped into your room when the drug was in full force and you couldn't resist her."

Closing his eyes in horror as the memory comes back to him, Keith mumbles, "I remember…" Opening his eyes to look at his friends, he adds, "I thought it was just a really weird dream at the time brought on by the flu. All I really remember is just some blurred images like you would from a dream so I had dismissed it from my mind."

Running his hand through his hair, Lance whispers, "I can't believe she did that!"

Shaking his head, Sven retorts, "I can't believe a lot of things that happened yesterday…including the fact that my wife defended her!" He turns his attention back to the man in the bed, "Coran is waiting outside Keith." He studies his friend sadly, "You know what he is going to demand."

Lying back down on the bed in misery, Keith covers his eyes with his hand as tears slide down the sides of his cheeks and into his hair, "It no longer matters…Beth has left me anyway."

Sven nods to him then gestures Lance to follow him to the door. He opens it to reveal the older man. Coran steps into the room, his eyes moving over to the figure in the bed. He nods to the other two. Gritting his teeth, Sven leaves the room, pulling Lance behind him. Coran closes the door then moves across the room, "Keith."

Moving his hand away, Keith looks up at him. Since their arrival, Coran was a man he had always respected. There was many a night when they had met when everyone else had gone to bed to discuss matters of security and defense. Those conversations were usually over a glass of Arusian wine while relaxing. Forcing himself to sit up in the bed, Keith finally murmurs, "Coran," as he stares down at the floor.

"I am sorry, Keith."

That simple statement has him bringing up his head. He looks up to find sadness in the older man's eyes. He watches as Coran glances over toward the desk. The advisor walks over, takes the chair then moves it closer to the bed before sitting down on it. As he crosses his legs, Coran continues, "I had a long conversation with Sven earlier. He informed me of Allura's crimes against you. I never thought Allura to be capable of something like this. I'm sad to say she is not the person I thought she was."

Keith looks away from him, refusing to answer. He hears Coran sigh deeply before saying, "Under normal circumstances, I would be asking you if you wanted to press charges against Allura. But these aren't normal circumstances."

Finally looking back at him, Keith quietly states, "I know what you want."

Coran does not answer at first as he stares at him. His jaw and mustache twitch with agitation as he contemplates the man before him. Finally, he answers, "I don't want it actually, for your sake if nothing else. However, your daughter needs to be legitimized if she is ever to take the crown of Arus."

He watches the anger flaring in the commander's eyes before Keith looks away again while answering, "I know."

Wishing he could just walk away and leave Keith alone, Coran asks, "There is one thing for you to contemplate as well." He waits until the commander looks at him again before continuing, "I've already spoken to the Council, you will be crowned King of Arus. My question to you is, do you wish to be king in name only or do you wish to take control?"

As Keith's eyes widen in shock, he adds, "Keith, given the circumstances, the Council feels you would be a better ruler for Arus. However, that is your decision to make. It will not be forced upon you."

"What happens if I don't take it?" Keith asks, his tone still showing his surprise.

Another deep sigh escapes Coran, "Allura will still be made queen and she will be allowed to rule. However, all of her decisions will need to be approved by the Council for an undetermined time. I'm afraid her judgment will no longer be trusted until she proves herself worthy of trust once more."

"Is this something you need an answer on today?" asks Keith as he shakes his head, "I can't…contemplate…that right now."

"Yes, much has happened since yesterday…too much for any of us to really take in. Of course you may think it over," answers the advisor, "Whenever you decide."

Keith manages a nod then runs his hand through his hair in agitation. Standing, Coran says, "I'll give you some time to shower and dress before we face Allura together."

A sudden rush of rage goes through Keith as he thinks about Allura and what she's done. Taking a deep breath and releasing it, Keith rises. He finds the older man staring at him with sad eyes, "I'm sorry, I wish I could just let you walk away from all of this."

Feeling the anger running through him until it almost feels like razors slicing him, Keith retorts, "So do I."

Noticing the rage in the commander's eyes, Coran takes an involuntary step back. Clearing his throat, he says, "I'll be waiting for you in my office," then turns around and leaves the room.

Clenching his fists as the door closes behind the advisor, Keith looks up at the ceiling while trying to calm down. Rage continues to eat at him until he gives up on trying to control it. Moving across the room, he enters the bathroom. Stopping beside the sink, Keith grips the edge while staring at himself in the mirror. Suddenly, he remembers the image of his daughter from yesterday. The anger diminishes slowly while he contemplates her. _'For her sake…I'll get through this,'_ he tells himself then strips before heading for the shower.

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An hour later, Allura holds her daughter, breastfeeding her, as her governess moves about the room, straightening it. She touches the baby's face, memorizing her every feature as the door opens. Nanny quickly walks to her, throwing a blanket over her shoulder to protect her modesty as Coran and Keith enter.

Finally turning her head, Allura looks over to see who her visitors are. She first gazes up at Keith, whose expression is impassive before quickly looking away to her advisor. Seeing the disapproval in Coran's eyes, she finally looks back down at the baby, shifting the blanket just enough so she can see her daughter's face again.

Frowning at her lack of consideration, Coran formally starts, "Princess Allura, you will marry Commander Kogane this afternoon by special license then be crowned King and Queen of Arus. During the ceremony, your daughter will be baptized Princess of Arus."

His words go through her in a daze. _'Marry Keith?'_ She feels her daughter suckling at her breast as she tries to contemplate the meaning. Unable to decide what to feel at the declaration, she tightens her grip on the baby. Refusing to look at them, the princess says nothing, using her free hand to touch the baby's cheek. Disgusted, the advisor snarls, "Allura, at least have the decency to look at me while I speak to you or did you lose your manners when you lost your morals?"

Allura looks up at Coran as if he slapped her. Ignoring the hurt look on her face, he demands, "How could you do something like this?"

Tears run down her face as she stares at the man who raised her as his daughter. His disapproval hurts unlike anything else said to her thus far. Allura refuses to look at Keith at all but turns back to the baby as she begins fussing. Shifting her to her shoulder, she pats her back gently. Nanny rushes over, "Enough of this! Coran, you can't upset her like this when she is feeding the baby."

Having been quiet since their entry, Keith stares down at the two of them. His eyes move over Nanny as she continues harping at Coran about making the baby colicky. As his daughter releases another cry, he leans down, taking her from her mother. Allura begins to protest then quits when she sees the enraged look in his eyes as his gaze briefly shifts from their daughter to her and then back to the baby. Gather his daughter into his arms, he walks over to the rocking chair in the room and sits down, holding her close to him while studying her. As she calms down, he finally looks back up at Allura, his gaze and tone carefully neutral, "Her name?"

Allura finally speaks as she watches them, "I haven't named her yet," then looks away from his intense, dark gaze.

Looking back into his daughter's face, Keith begins to feel love for her despite the way she was conceived. He sighs as he runs a finger along her cheek, "Adrienne Belladonna."

Walking over, Nanny studies the father and his daughter as she inquires, "What do the names mean?"

Looking up at her, he replies, "Adrienne means dark one, Belladonna, beautiful woman."

Gazing across the room at them, Coran drily says, "That seems appropriate."

Arching an eyebrow at him, Keith makes no other comment before looking back down at his daughter as he continues to rock her to sleep. From across the room, tears down her cheeks as Allura watches them. Once the baby is asleep, Keith stands, hands her to the governess, then looks at Coran, "I will be ready and in the throne room by 1500." He does not look back at Allura at all. Instead, he turns and leaves the room.

Turning to Nanny, the advisor instructs, "I will be here at a quarter to, have Allura dressed and ready please." Without another word to the princess, he leaves the room as well.

Hearing a sob coming from the bed, Nanny crosses the room with the baby in her arms. She hands her back to the princess as she says, "Do not worry, everything will work out with time."

Holding her sleeping daughter close to her, Allura sucks in a sob as she nods in answer. Lying back on the bed, she places Adrienne beside her then closes her eyes as she wonders how it will work out with Keith so angry with her.

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Reaching his bedroom, the commander slams his hand on the button to open the door then pushes his way past the opening door to enter. Walking over to a wall containing pictures, he looks at the one of the team together, his eyes falling on Allura, who stands right next to him smiling brightly. The whole team had been standing together, arm in arm, his own resting across Allura's shoulders. Ripping it off the wall, Keith hurls it across the room.

The sound of glass shattering greets Sven as he walks into the room. He glances at the broken picture frame then back at his friend to find Keith sucking in deep, angry breaths. When he begins pacing the small space, Sven quietly speaks, "I take it the meeting with Allura went well?"

His black eyes shining with his anger, Keith pauses long enough to snarl, "Wedding is at 1500," then resumes his pacing.

Nodding to him, Sven continues to watch him pace for a minute more before he asks, "What's wrong?" When Keith stops to glare incredulously at him, Sven clears his throat, "Beyond the obvious. I know you, my friend…beside what Allura's done, something is bothering you."

Looking upward at his ceiling, Keith finally closes his eyes and takes several deep breaths, trying to calm down. He hears Sven move and looks over to find him sitting on the bed. Moving across the room to sit beside him, Keith somberly answers, "I've never hurt a woman in my entire life. When we walked into her room, it took every bit of self-control I had not to grab Allura and beat her senseless."

"Understandable feeling, given what's happened," Sven replies quietly. When Keith glances curiously at him, he expounds, "Keith, she hurt you deeply. Something you never thought possible. It's only human that you want to strike back."

"But physical violence? Even all the times I've fought Lotor, I've never felt the desire to kill him. All my moves against him have been in defense," reasons the commander with a sigh then he lays back on his bed and covers his face with the back of his arm. "How am I going to get through the service? I felt such…rage…when I was near her…I wanted to physically hurt her. I don't know to stop it."

"Perhaps you shouldn't try…"

The arm moves away and Keith stares incredulously at his friend again. Sven sighs, "I mean, don't try to stop the rage. You have a right to be angry. You will work through it all in time."

"So, who's going to stop me from throttling her during the service?" asks the commander sarcastically.

Sven smiles grimly, "I am your Best Man…guess I'll have to do the honors."

Snorting derisively, Keith lowers his arm over his face once more to cover it. Sven reaches over to pat his shoulder, "Why don't you rest for a while. I'll come back and wake you when it's time."

He stares at Keith until he notices the slight nod then rises and leaves the room. Walking out the door, he finds Lance waiting for him, "How is he?"

Gesturing for the other man to follow, Sven moves away from the door. As they walk down the hall together, he finally answers, "Not in a good place mentally. He's going to need our support today."

"I know," answers Lance grimly as they continue down the hallway together.

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Standing in front of the chapel, Keith paces the small area, ignoring the sounds of disapproval from the bishop as they wait for Allura's arrival. Turning in his pacing, he moves back across the dais and meets Sven's gaze. The other man's worried eyes probe him, as if looking for signs that he will break and run. Snorting in disgust to himself even as he acknowledges that his running from the room is something he has been fighting since his arrival, Keith turns and resumes pacing in the other direction. He glances down at the "guests" to find Lance, Christine, Pidge, Hunk and Michael all watching him closely as well.

The door to the back of the room opens to reveal the bride, her advisor, who is guiding her, her governess, who is carrying Adrienne, and finally, Romelle, who is holding onto Allura's other hand. His eyes move over her as they approach and Keith can feel the anger inside of him once again building to a rage. Dressed in her favorite pink, princess dress, her blue eyes gaze up at him hopefully as they approach, only for Keith to turn away from her as he takes his place beside the bishop.

Feeling her knees turning to jelly, Allura slows her movements as they finish crossing the room. Only Coran pulling on her arm keeps her moving forward as they climb the steps toward Keith. He refuses to meet her gaze as the bishop inquires, "Is everyone ready?"

She nods as she studies the commander. It is obvious he is gritting his teeth when he nods to the bishop as well. Quietly sucking in a deep breath, Allura barely listens as the bishop begins the ceremony. Her eyes flit to Keith every little while, only to find him staring straight ahead. Glancing down into the audience, she finds most of them either staring at the floor. Time seems to slow down as the bishop lectures them on the merits of marriage and the proper conduct of a husband and wife.

"Face each other…"

Allura barely hears the instruction, only when the bishop clears his throat and repeats himself does she turn to face Keith. His gaze rests somewhere above her head as the bishop asks her to repeat the wedding vows.

She looks up into his face as she whispers, "I, Allura, take you Keith, to be my husband. To have and to hold, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part."

"Very good, now Commander, repeat after me…"

As Keith repeats his vows, he continues to look over her head, his tone almost robotic as he recites them. As he finishes, "…until death do us part," his eyes briefly flicker down to her and Allura almost pulls back from the anger she can see in them.

He looks away again almost immediately as the bishop asks for the rings. Allura watches him turn around to accept them from Sven. As he turns back, Keith hands them to the bishop then turns his body to face her, his gaze once again above her head. As the bishop recites the blessing of the rings, Allura glances down into the audience again. Everyone is now staring forward, but no one, except Nanny, is looking at her.

Her attention returns as the bishop touches her arm then hands her the ring. She glances down at the simple gold band then looks forward to find Keith holding his right hand out to her. Her fingers tremble as she touches his hand, feeling him flinch.

"Repeat after me…With this ring, I thee wed."

Fighting to keep the trembling out of her voice, she whispers, "With this ring…I thee…wed."

She feels Keith ripping his hand away from her then hears the bishop clearing his throat. Glancing to the side, she watches the bishop hand the other ring to Keith. It is similar to his, only a simple gold band. However, to Allura's eyes, it seems different somehow…inferior.

"Your hand…"

Jumping at Keith's emotionless tone, her hand instantly rises. Looking up into his face, Allura notes that his gaze is on her hand. He quickly places the ring on her finger as he recites, "With this ring, I thee wed," then instantly releases her and takes a step back.

He looks away from her entirely then as the bishop finishes, "I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."

She knew this was part of the ceremony, had heard it said many times, but for whatever reason, did not expect to hear it today. Allura looks up into Keith's face to find him finally looking in her eyes. The anger she saw earlier is gone, leaving them expressionless. He looks away a moment later and shakes his head at the bishop.

Nodding to him, the bishop directs them to face the audience, "I give you Keith and Allura Kogane."

Turning to the smattering of unenthusiastic applause, Allura faces her friends to find once again, no one looking directly at her. She glances sideways to find Keith staring at the floor, refusing to look at anyone. They both turn back around when the bishop requests them to for the coronation ceremony.

Kneeling facing the room while the bishop holds the crown over his head and recites the vows of a King of Arus, Keith stares over everyone's heads. He does not visibly react when the crown is finally placed on his head and he is declared king. Closing his eyes, he listens to the bishop recite the same vows for Allura's position as queen. Keith ignores the speech as he once again tries to regain control of his emotions. Rage had eaten away at him initially until he had felt a numbness overcome him midway through the wedding ceremony.

The smell of Allura's perfume had teased his senses when they had kneeled together for the coronation and his emotions began to flood him once more. He barely notices when the ceremony ends and the bishop asks him to stand with Allura. Refusing to look at her, Keith stares straight ahead as the bishop makes his second announcement, "I give you King Keith Kogane and Queen Allura Kogane. May their rule be long and just."

Standing unnaturally still, he only comes alive again when Nanny steps forward with his daughter. Taking Adrienne from her before Allura can, Keith holds her close to his chest as the bishop begins the baptism ceremony. For the first time, he feels a smile tugging at his lips as she yawns sleepily, her little rosebud mouth forming a small O. Lifting her up in his arms, he kisses her cheek.

The ceremony concludes as the bishop places ashes in the form of a cross on her forehead. He takes the baby from Keith and holds her up as he declares, "All, for now and forever, I present Adrienne Belladonna Kogane, Princess of Arus," to the general applause of the Force. Taking the baby back from the bishop, Keith walks away from the dais toward his friends, without a thought for his wife.

Sven is about to follow Keith, but Romelle grabs his arm, stopping him. He inquisitively looks down into her face but she is not looking at him. Instead, she is looking at her cousin, whose face had crumpled into tears as she watched Keith walk away with their daughter. Releasing a sob, Allura begins to slowly sink to the floor. Romelle releases her hold on Sven and quickly walks the few steps to her, wrapping her arms around Allura to hold her up.

Sighing, Sven moves over to them and pushes Romelle aside as he picks up the new queen. Concerned, Nanny runs up to them, "Allura!"

The others look back as Sven shakes his head at the governess, "Too much too soon I think, Nanny. She is just overwhelmed." He turns his attention to Keith, who eyes his wife dispassionately for a moment before handing his daughter to Hunk then walks over to them. As he reaches for her, Sven tightens his grip on her. Their eyes meet again. Keith nods to him in understanding then takes Allura from him. Turning away with her in his arms, the king walks out of the room without another word.

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Moving steadily, Keith walks down the hall carrying Allura, ignoring the sniffling sounds she continues to make as she cries. He enters her bedroom and despite his desire to simply throw her on her bed, he is mindful of the fact that she just gave birth less than twenty-four hours ago and gently lays her down before he steps back.

He watches his wife for a moment then all of his anger comes back to the surface. Fighting against the desire to scream at her, Keith demands, "How could you do this to me, Allura? You were supposed to be my friend! How the hell could you drug and rape me?"

Refusing to answer from him, Allura lies back on her pillows, curling into a ball as much as she can in her current condition. Losing what little hold he has on his temper, Keith sits on the bed and pulls Allura up by her arms again. She cries out as he yells at her, "Answer me Allura! I deserve to know why you did this!"

Shaking her head as tears roll down her cheeks, Allura closes her eyes against the rage she saw in her husband's gaze. Disgusted with her silence, Keith pushes her away from him and rises from the bed. He walks briskly to the door then pauses, his voice low and furious, as he turns to face her once more, "This is a marriage in name only, Allura. If you know what is good for you, you will stay away from me. You made your bed and you can lie in it, alone." He turns around and storms out the door.

Angrily, he moves down the hallway. As Keith nears the chapel, he does not even look at Romelle as she passes him by. The princess pauses in her steps to look back at him, glaring at his departing back. Irritated, she hurries back down the hallway. She enters Allura's room to find her sobbing on her bed, "Allura!"

Rushing across the room, she pulls her cousin up into her arms as Allura sobs out, "He hates me now!"

Romelle holds her as she continues to cry, making soft comforting noises to her while stroking her hair. '_As much as I want to tell her he is just angry, I'm not entirely sure Keith doesn't hate her now.' _A tear slides down her cheek as she continues to hold her brokenhearted cousin.

Once she calms down, Allura moves away from Romelle and lies down on her pillow, hugging it close to her body. Moving to sit beside her, Romelle runs her hand along Allura's head, stroking her hair then lightly rubs her back. Soon, Allura falls asleep.

Rising from the bed slowly to ensure she does not wake Allura, Romelle leaves the room. She walks down the hall to her own bedroom then drops onto the bed, utterly exhausted by the day's events. She is almost asleep when the door to the room opens, startling her as Sven walks in. Hand to her chest, she calms her breathing as he approaches the bed with an apologetic smile, "Sorry love, I didn't mean to scare you."

Sven lies down beside her and takes her into his arms as Romelle rests her head on his shoulder. Turning his head, he kisses her forehead as she sighs. They lay together for a while before she draws herself up enough to look into his eyes. She continues to study his dark eyes before deciding to ask, "Does Keith hate Allura now?"

His gaze turns indecipherable as he guardedly replies, "Why do you ask?"

Pulling away from her husband, Romelle retorts, "Why won't you just answer the question?"

Studying his wife as his own anger builds, Sven snarls, "Because if you are asking so you can give Allura some kind of hope that he will forgive her, fall in love with her and everything will be perfect, then I refuse to help you with that."

Glaring at him, she angrily rises from the bed, intending to leave the room. Jumping up, Sven grabs her even as she tries to pull her arms away from him. He tightens his hold on her as he pulls her against his chest, so she cannot escape him. Looking into her face, he finds tears running down her cheeks.

Groaning, his lips move along her forehead as he pleads, "Please don't cry Romelle…you know I hate it when you cry."

She sobs against his chest, "You…don't understand…the pain…she's in…"

Pulling her chin up so he can stare deeply into her eyes, he replies, "Do you understand the pain Keith is in? Allura betrayed him, Romelle! She cost him the woman he loved and was supposed to marry in two months. She was supposed to be his friend! A friend wouldn't do something like that!"

Closing her eyes against his probing gaze, Romelle finally pulls away from him and returns to the bed, sitting down on it as she wipes her cheeks. She finally looks back up to plead with him, "Please Sven, she is my only cousin, one of the few family members I have left. I need to know."

Sven runs his hand through his hair then walks across the room to sit beside her. He studies the wall across from him for several minutes before answering in a calm tone, "I don't really know, Romelle. I've never seen Keith this angry before and he is normally quite good at hiding his emotions. I just don't know if the anger will fade or if it will grow into hate. He's very hurt right now. Frankly, I'm just glad he isn't taking it out on his daughter. He already seems to love that baby."

Leaning over to rest her head against his shoulder, she asks, "How do we help them?

Wrapping his arm around her waist and resting his head against hers, he answers, "We can't help them, Romelle. This is something they have to resolve on their own."

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Several hours later, Romelle walks back to Allura's room later and enters quietly to find her cousin in the rocking chair, rocking her daughter while she breast-feeds her. Allura looks up to see who her visitor is then returns her attention to the baby in her arms.

Romelle walks up to her and attempts to smile at her, "Feeling better?"

She watches Allura's eyes start to fill with tears, which she closes to try to stifle the flow. Allura takes one arm away from Adrienne, wipes her eyes then pulls her daughter a bit closer to her.

Sighing, Romelle informs her, "Dinner is in thirty minutes. Nanny said she made one of your favorite dishes."

Shaking her head, Allura whispers, "Nobody wants me there."

Anger floods Romelle until she snaps, "I want you there Allura. So you will quit wallowing in self-pity, get dressed and come with me to the dining room for dinner."

Allura looks up at her shocked as more tears fill her eyes. Romelle sighs then goes and sits on the bed across from them to face her, "I'm sorry Allura, but you need to do this. You need to hold your head up high and face everyone. You can't hide in here forever."

Closing her eyes, Allura feels the tears run down her cheeks. Adrienne begins fussing and Romelle gets up to take the baby from her, cooing to her and patting her back. Once the she calms down, Romelle walks into the nursery and hands the baby off to the maid working in there then re-enters the bedroom.

She finds Allura by her closet, pulling out a dress. She faces Romelle as she enters, asking quietly, "Will you help me?"

Romelle smiles at her, "Of course."

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Holding Allura's hand tightly, Romelle smiles encouragingly at her as they walk into the dining room together. Conversation immediately dies upon their entrance as everyone briefly looks at them, and then looks away. Allura tightens her grip on Romelle's hand as her eyes drift over everyone in the room, none of which will look at her. Her gaze drifts to Keith, who is staring down at the table, anger radiating from him.

Romelle squeezes her hand getting Allura to turn her gaze back at her. She smiles at her reassuringly then guides them to their chairs in the middle of the table. Conversation resumes in the room as Sven and Lance resume their discussion. Soon the sounds of the other men speaking fill the room as the servants begin serving dinner.

Slowly eating her dinner, Allura's eyes drift around the room. She manages to make eye contact with Pidge, only for him to turn red and look away from her. Everyone one else thoroughly ignores her as they eat their dinner and talk to each other, except for Keith. Looking down the table, she finds him eating his dinner silently, the others leaving him alone to his own thoughts.

Putting her fork down as the small amount of food she consumed begins to feel like a lead weight in her stomach, Allura stares blindly down at her plate. Fisting her hands into the skirt of her dress, she tries to keep herself from crying. '_I've lost all my friends…'_ She starts and looks over to find Romelle's hand covering hers, squeezing it. She meets her eyes as Romelle smiles at her and continues to squeeze her hand.


	10. Chapter 10

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 10

The following morning, Romelle and Sven are arguing as they are getting dressed. Reaching behind her to zip up her skirt, she questions, "Why do we need to leave today, Sven? I still don't understand why you are insisting on this when you know Allura needs me."

Pulling his shirt over his head then yanking it down into place, Sven snaps at his wife, "She doesn't need you Romelle, except to hide behind you."

Narrowing her eyes at him, she retorts, "You mean actually supporting her, unlike the rest of you, who ignored her and wouldn't even acknowledge her presence in the dining room at dinner last night."

Glaring at her, Sven moves to sit down on the bed, exasperation filling him, "Romelle, I don't want us to start fighting over this. This is Keith and Allura's problem and we don't need to be in the middle of it. Michael is fully trained to take over Blue lion. We are no longer needed here."

Closing her eyes as her anger drains, Romelle sighs as she moves to sit beside her husband. He puts an arm around her. Laying her head on his shoulder, she murmurs, "I don't want to fight either, but Sven, she is so vulnerable right now."

Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, Sven kisses her forehead instead as he replies, "Yes, but it isn't like you can't talk to her. You know a video call is just moments away." He feels his wife squirm against him and he tightens his grip on her as he hugs her, "We have our own responsibilities on Pollux that we need to get back to."

Sighing again, Romelle finally acquiesces, "Very well, we will go home after breakfast."

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Having foregone breakfast, Keith immediately goes to his office the next morning. Sitting down at his desk, he holds his aching head between his hands. He had spent the evening before with Sven and Lance, drowning his sorrows in whisky once more. Somewhere along the line, Sven had informed him of his plan to return to Pollux this morning. While he wished his friend could stay a little longer, Keith understood his need to leave as well. Between the mess with Allura and the fact that they have already been gone from Pollux for over six month, there was too much drama going on here and too much work at home that needed to be done for him to stay. In addition, after everything he had been through, Sven was man who needed some peace in his life…peace that he would not find on Arus.

Opening a drawer, Keith pulls out a bottle of aspirin. Opening it, he takes out two of them and throws them in his mouth. Picking up a bottle of water, he drinks from it just as the door to his office opens. Setting the bottle back down, Keith arches an eyebrow at his visitor, "You used to knock, Coran."

Smiling at him, the old advisor replies, "And normally I would, but thought your head might be hurting this morning. I was informed you had a bit to drink last night."

Narrowing his eyes at him, Keith snorts, "Who was the tattletale? Lance?"

"Nanny actually," he answers with a laugh, "She cleaned up the empty bottles and glasses from the rec room this morning."

Rolling his eyes, Keith sits back in his chair, "What do you need?"

"Just wondering if you gave any thought to your position on the throne," the advisor asks in a quiet tone.

Sucking in a deep breath, Keith's fingers dig painfully into the arms of his chair. Gritting his teeth, he closes his eyes against the rush of anger the question triggered. He opens his eyes again when he hears, "If you need more time…"

Forcing himself to calm down, Keith stares up at the older man as he answers, "Leave it with…her…for now." He seems to rethink it a moment later, "I guess, bring me things as you need to, but I don't want all of it."

Nodding, Coran replies, "Very well, I will inform the Council. If you should change your mind…"

"I'll let you know," Keith interjects.

"Very well, I'll leave you to your duties," the advisor says before turning around and walking out of the room.

Turning his chair to face the window, Keith stares outside at the blue skies, spotting a flock of birds…wishing he could fly away as well.

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Down on the tarmac, tears run down Allura's face as she hugs Romelle, clinging to her. Her words are hitched as she cries, "I wish…I wish you didn't have to leave."

Returning the hug, Romelle strokes her hair as Sven walks past them and boards the shuttle, not even speaking to Allura. Irritated with him, Romelle glares at his retreating back then sighs as she pulls away from her cousin, "You know I'm a call away. Anytime you need to talk, I want you to call me."

She shudders as Allura nods in agreement. Romelle smiles at her once more. Glancing up at the castle, she adds, "Remember what I said about keeping your head high. I know you feel like everyone hates you right now, but their anger will pass. They will forgive you eventually. It will just take some time and patience on your part."

Looking doubtful, Allura tries to remain positive as she replies, "I will try." She wipes at the tears on her cheeks while trying to smile at her cousin. Romelle nods to her then turns away to board the shuttle as Allura backs away toward the castle. Despite her reassurances to Romelle, she cannot help the despondent feeling the sight of the shuttle taking off gives her. Wrapping her arms around her waist, she enters the castle and slowly makes her way toward her room.

Staring at the floor as she passes various castle personnel to avoid eye contact, Allura cannot help but look up when she hears familiar booted footsteps in front of her. Pausing, she finds Lance briskly walking down the hall toward her. Meeting his gaze, Allura almost stumbles back from the fury that is in them. Her back presses against the wall behind her as he walks past without a word. Desperate, she turns to look at his retreating back and whispers, "Lance…please."

He stops suddenly then turns back to her, every muscle in his body taut as he angrily asks, "Please what, Allura?"

His gaze burning through her, Allura's eyes tear up. She turns her head away from him, unable to answer. She can hear his contemptuous snort of disgust as she digs her shaking fingers into her skirt. Taking a deep breath, Allura finally looks back at him through the tears to find him glaring at her. Suddenly, as if he just made a decision, he walks back to her then grabs her arm while yelling at her, "What the fuck were you thinking? How could you do that to Keith?"

Sobbing out as she tries to pull her arm away from him, the queen replies, "I didn't…mean to hurt…"

Lance does not let her finish as he yells, "You didn't mean to hurt him! You practically rape the man and you didn't mean to hurt him!" He releases her arm and turns away in disgust, starting to walk away. With her back against the wall once more, Allura continues to cry as he suddenly stops then turns back toward her once more. His voice is low and furious, "You know the thing that pisses me off the most Allura? He defended you to everyone when we found you were pregnant. He even threatened to walk away from his duty to defend you, not knowing that you had betrayed him and you stood there and let him do it, saying nothing."

Refusing to answer him, Allura sinks to the floor as she continues to sob. Lance shakes his head in disgust, turns and walks away.

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After a time, Allura slowly pulls herself back up then ambles the rest of the way to her room. She wipes at her cheeks as she enters her room. The need to hold her daughter overwhelms her so she walks across the room toward the nursery room door. Opening the door, she finds Keith sitting in a rocking chair cuddling Adrienne against his chest. Allura stands in the doorway silently, watching the smile on his face as Keith leans down to kiss their daughter's cheek then murmurs to her, "You are beautiful, aren't you, my precious…"

Finally sensing someone in the room, he turns his head toward the door and the smile instantly leaves his face. In its place is a mask of granite as Keith glares at her. Allura almost steps back from the fury in his eyes until he finally speaks, his tone showing his anger, "I'm spending time with my daughter, Allura. Get out."

Tears run down her cheeks as she turns away, closing the nursery room door. Stumbling across the room through the blur of tears, she falls onto her bed then curls up in a ball crying, hopelessness filling her heart.

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Rising from her bed several hours later, Allura glances at the clock then slowly makes her way back to the nursery. Opening the door, she hesitantly steps inside to find the room empty save a nursemaid tidying up the room. The woman nods to Allura then leaves the room. Making her way over to the crib, the queen stares down on her sleeping daughter. Feeling tears stinging her eyes, she bends over to kiss her lightly then makes her way back into her bedroom.

After bathing and dressing, she leaves her room, hesitantly making her way down the hall. Romelle's earlier words about holding her head up ring in her ears as she makes her way to the dining room. Approaching the doors, she begins trembling. Stopping near it, Allura looks into the room to find the chairs rearranged. The two that Sven and Romelle had been using were removed and the others moved down in order to leave a gap near the end of the table where one lone chair sat.

Feeling tears sliding down her cheeks, Allura looks over the occupants to note that Coran is missing from the group. Keith had moved from his normal seat to one near the end of the table, far from the only seat left open at the other end. Choking back the sob threatening to escape her, she turns around and moves back down the hallway.

From his seat at the table, Keith notices movement near the door. The brighter lights of the dining room keeps the person in shadow, but the general shape leaves no question as to the person's identity. He watches the shadow in the doorway turn and move away. Biting down hard on the almost uncontrollable anger still streaming through him, he forces his attention on the plate being placed in front of him.

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Later that night, the governess leaves the kitchen and moves down the hallway toward the royal suites. She knocks on the door of the queen then enters, not waiting for a response. The room is almost dark, outside of a single lit lamp near the bedside where Allura lays with her back to her. Briskly walking across the room, Nanny glances at the table near the window to find the tray of food she had brought earlier sits untouched.

Gritting her teeth, she moves around the bed so she can look down on the queen. "Allura, you didn't eat a bite of the dinner I brought you!"

Opening her eyes, Allura murmurs, "I wasn't hungry," then closes them again.

"It doesn't matter if you are hungry or not, you need to eat!" When her statement brings forth no response, Nanny argues, "If you don't eat, you will not be able to produce any milk! How will you feed your daughter then?"

Reopening her eyes, Allura feels the tears stinging them as she sits up in the bed and looks over at the tray. Nodding to her governess, she rises from the bed and sits down at the table by the window. As she starts to eat slowly, Nanny takes a deep breath of relief then begins to move about the room, straightening it.

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The next morning, Coran carries a stack of papers with him as he nears the queen's bedroom. Knocking on the door, he enters a moment later when he hears Nanny's voice. Opening the door, he walks into the room to find the queen in a chair, rocking her daughter as Nanny works on straightening the bed. His eyes move over Allura, noting that even though the hour is late, she is still dressed only in a bathrobe and her face is pale.

Keeping his tone indifferent, he finally greets her, "Good morning, your Majesty. I have brought with me paperwork that needs your attention."

His eyes stay on Allura as she finally looks up at him. He holds her gaze as she seems to study him for a moment then she looks back down at her daughter as she replies, "Place it on the table please. I'll look at them in a while."

Nodding to her, he places the files on the table as requested then shares a concerned look with Nanny before leaving the room.

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One week later, Michael exits the launch system after practice. His eyes move over the others as they return then settle on his commanding officer. In the week since his daughter was born, he had turned into a different man. The smiling, happy to engage in social conversation commander he had met when he first came to Arus was gone. These days the new king rarely spoke to anyone unless it was necessary.

He watches Keith move over to Lance, say something quietly to him then leave castle control. Lance pulls his comm. unit off his belt and quickly speaks into it before turning back to face them. The dais lowers behind him. The advisor steps down and questions, "Where is his Majesty going? I thought we were going to meet after practice."

"Leave him alone, Coran," Lance replies as he steps in front of him. He glances back at the door as he continues, "He's having a bad day."

"He is King of Arus and has serious responsibilities. Responsibility doesn't have time for a bad day," Coran snaps back at him.

Turning back to him, Lance arches an eyebrow, "Most kings aren't lethal when having a bad day like Keith is. Leave him alone."

Coran glares at him the moves back to his place in the command chair. Clearing his throat, Michael steps closer to Lance, "If we aren't going to meet this morning, mind if I disappear for a while?"

Turning his attention to the private, Lance asks, "What's up?"

Shrugging, he answers, "Just feel the need to get out for some fresh air."

The lieutenant eyes him a moment more then replies, "Fine, go, but keep your comm. unit on you."

Nodding to him, Michael breathes a sigh of relief. He mock salutes Lance, who shakes his head at him, then leaves the room. Moving quickly, he heads for the castle stables.

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Slowly making his way to his office, Keith tries to rein in his feelings once more. Hunk had made an innocent remark during practice that had reminded him of his wife. A wife whose very name brought forth all of the rage he felt the day of his wedding to the surface once more. He needed to get away from everyone when they returned and Lance had been good enough to assist him in that. Reaching his office, he walks into the room to find the governess standing there with his daughter.

The older woman gives him a dirty look, "As you requested."

Taking Adrienne from her, the king finally feels the anger dissipating as he looks into her clear sapphire blue eyes. Smiling for the first time all day, he waves the older woman away, "Give me thirty minutes to enjoy my daughter Nanny, that's all I ask."

Ignoring her harrumphing as she exits the room, Keith moves to the sofa in his office. Sitting down, he holds Adrienne close to him as he continues to smile.

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Waking up, Allura glances toward the window to find the sun shining through it. The urge to shove her head under her pillow and go back to sleep is almost over powering. Only the pressure in her breasts and the need to feed Adrienne gets her to throw back the blankets. Moving across the room, she enters the nursery to find the crib empty. Feeling panicky, Allura moves back into her bedroom and hits the button to call for help. She begins pacing the room as she waits.

Nanny enters the room a minute or two later to find Allura wringing her hands as she paces. When the queen finally notices her, she frantically says, "Adrienne is gone!"

Walking up to her to take her hands, the governess replies, "She is only with her father for a short while."

Tears fill her eyes as Allura whimpers, "Keith?"

"Yes, he wanted to spend some time with her this morning," Nanny answers as she directs her charge back toward her bed.

Tears continue down Allura's face as she listens to Nanny instructing her to take a shower and she would come back with some breakfast for her in a bit. Lying back down against the pillows, the queen curls into a ball as she continues to cry instead.

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Approaching the village, Michael's nerves start to get the better of him. The thought about turning around and heading back to the castle goes through him. He pushes the feeling away then pushes the horse to move faster. Reaching the center of town, he slows the horse down to a walk. His eyes move over the people in the market area as they whisper to each other while pointing at the Voltron pilot in their midst. Steeling his spine, Michael continues his way through the village, finally reaching his destination on the other side.

Dismounting, he ties the reins to the nearby fence. Determinedly, he moves up the walk, reaching the door just as it opens to reveal Beth. Her eyes appear red and puffy, her hair disheveled, her dress wrinkled. It is obvious she has not gotten over the end of her engagement to the commander. Her eyes widen at the site of him then they narrow as she snarls, "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Who did you think I was?" Michael asks casually as he stops in front of her.

Glaring at him, Beth steps back inside, slamming the door behind her. It does not latch however and the door partially reopens. Pushing it aside, Michael follows her into the sitting room. Turning around to find him right behind her, Beth's face turns red with anger as she yells, "GET OUT!"

"You know…" starts the Irishman slowly as he sits down on one of the wing-backed chairs, "…all I wanted to do was come by and see how you are faring."

Standing there with her chest heaving in anger, she does not answer him. Michael continues to study her as she crosses her arms across her chest. Sighing deeply, he whispers, "I take it you aren't faring well?"

"How did you think I'd be doing?" Beth finally snaps at him, "Did you think I'd be happy that my fiancé fucked the princess behind my back, got her pregnant then had to marry her?"

"It wasn't like that," Michael sighs out as he stands back up.

"Oh, what did I miss?" she sarcastically asks.

Wondering for a minute if he should tell her what really happened, Michael studies her. Her impatience is beginning to show as she glares at him while tapping her foot. Figuring the story would get out eventually anyway, he shrugs, "Allura drugged Keith…he had no idea the baby Allura was carrying was his."

Her eyes grow wide with surprise then anger shines through, "That bitch!" She moves forward while demanding, "Take me up to the castle!"

"For what?" asks Michael as he arches an eyebrow at her in question.

Looking at him as if he really has become an idiot, Beth snaps, "Keith needs me! I should have never left him!"

Shaking his head at her, the private retorts, "He's married to Allura now…what do you hope to accomplish?"

Pausing mid-step, Beth looks at him flummoxed, "He still married her?"

Giving her one short nod, he adds, "It wasn't like he had a choice." At her continued look of confusion, Michael informs her, "Keith had to marry her to legitimize Adrienne's birth."

Looking deflated, Beth sinks onto the sofa as tears begin to slide down her cheeks. Moving to sit beside her, Michael reaches over to place a hand on top of hers, "I'm sorry."

Pulling her hand away, Beth is instantly angry again, "For what?"

"That you were hurt," he answers sincerely.

Her eyes turn derisive, "No, you're not!" She stands to face him, "You've done nothing but try to get between Keith and I since you arrived!"

Slowly standing up while feeling the rage building in him, he snaps, "No, I haven't! I did everything I could to stay away from you!"

"Yeah, right!" Taking a step toward him, Beth yells, "Every time I turned around you were staring at me!"

Glaring at her, Michael decides to inflict some pain of his own, "So what hurts you more, Beth? That you lost Keith or that you lost the prestige of being the future wife of the Commander of the Voltron Force?"

"How dare you!" she snaps as she slaps him.

Rubbing his cheek, he retorts, "That wasn't an answer."

Turning away, Beth walks back to the door and yanks it open, "Get out!"

Walking across the room, Michael stops next to her. He captures her gaze then reaches out to caress her cheek with a single finger, "A chuisle, one day I hope you realize what you could have."

"What does that mean?" she demands as she pulls away from his hand.

He stares at her for a moment longer then whispers, "My love," before turning around and walking out of the house. Quickly moving down the walk, he rips the reins of his horse away from the fence. Mounting him, Michael glances back at the house to find Beth standing there, staring at him in confusion. Knowing she will not call him back no matter how much he might wish she would, Michael snaps the reins and cantors away.


	11. Chapter 11

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 11

Two days later, Nanny walks into Allura's bedroom to find her lying in the bed with the baby. Glancing her way, she notices the greasy look to the queen's hair and skin. Moving to standing in front of her, she demands, "I told you earlier to get a shower! You need to go bathe!"

"Go away Nanny…" is the quiet reply as the queen rubs the baby's belly as Adrienne sleeps quietly.

"No! I will not! You haven't had a bath in at least two days!" The governess bends down and pulls the child away from her. Allura rises angrily from the bed, demanding, "Give her back!"

Holding the princess tightly in her arms, Nanny retorts, "You need to be clean for her Majesty! Imagine how sick Adrienne could get if she suckles on you while your skin is so dirty. Please Allura, go bathe!"

She watches tears forming in the queen's eyes then sliding down her cheeks as Allura stands there and stares at them. Relief fills Nanny when she finally nods to her then makes her way over to the bathroom. When she returns twenty minutes later with wet hair, the governess points to the vanity, "Sit Majesty, I will brush your hair out."

Shaking her head, Allura instead demands, "Where is Adrienne?"

"Sleeping soundly in her crib. Please Allura, let me brush out your hair," pleads Nanny.

Ignoring her, the queen moves to the door to the nursery and walks through it. Sighing sadly, Nanny moves over to the bed and starts to rip off the blankets and sheets in order to change them. When finished, she leaves the room and makes her way down to Coran's office. Knocking on the door, she enters when bidden to find the advisor working at his desk.

He smiles in greeting as she approaches then the smile leaves his face as she angrily states, "The queen's getting worse."

"Nanny, please don't exaggerate," sighs Coran as he settles back into his chair.

"I am not…she only bathed today after I pointed out she needed to stay clean for the baby. After that, she wouldn't let me brush out her hair. She is getting worse," restates the governess.

Sighing, Coran inquires, "What would you like me to do about it?"

"Speak to the king!"

Laughter erupts out of Coran as he replies, "You must be joking! You know how he feels about her, Nanny."

"Then I will!" she retorts then she turns around and leaves the room.

Running a hand over his face, Coran grimaces, "Gods above…help us!"

When she returns ten minutes later, Nanny's face is red with anger as she yells, "HE THEATENED ME!"

"What?" asks the advisor as he stands up from his chair.

She continues to rage, "The minute I said the queen's name, the king tried to leave. When I grabbed his arm to stop him, he threatened to hit me if I ever did so again!"

"Nanny…I tried to warn you," answers Coran quietly.

Seething with her anger, Nanny once again says, "We need to do something!"

"I will try to speak with Lance…" replies the advisor, "But do not get your hopes up."

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Two weeks later, Dr. Gorma leaves Allura's room and walks down the hall to Coran's study. He enters without knocking, anger radiating from him, "Why the hell didn't you inform me sooner of the queen's condition?"

Sitting back in his chair, Coran watches his friend of many years pace his office, "I knew she was depressed. Last week she started to refuse to do her work, telling me to give it to Keith instead. However, I didn't realize how bad she was until today, when she stopped speaking to me or Nanny entirely."

Dr. Gorma stops pacing and faces him, "What of the king? Don't tell me he hasn't noticed her behavior?"

Sighing sadly, Coran temples his fingers in front of him as he replies, "John, you know that the marriage was forced. Keith is still very angry with the Allura and doesn't go near her. Unfortunately the rest of the Force is following his example…due to their loyalty to him I'm sure."

Throwing his hands up in the air, the doctor asks in a disgusted tone, "You mean you haven't spoken to him about this?"

Cringing, Coran finally stands and walks around his desk, "I can't. Any time I have tried to speak to him about the queen, he leaves the room." Coran closes his eyes as he rubs his face, "He actually threatened Nanny with violence if she didn't leave him alone. She was quite shocked by it." Frustration shines in his eyes as he continues, "I even tried to speak to his lieutenant about it, thinking maybe he would be able to make his Majesty understand. Lance wouldn't even let me finish and I won't repeat what he said to me about the queen in polite company."

Dr. Gorma shakes his head, incredulously, "I will speak to him about it. I will make him understand that she can't be left like that," he then turns and leaves the room.

Rubbing his temple against the headache he feels coming on, Coran mumbles, "May he have better luck than the rest of us have."

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Sitting in his office, Keith smiles at the video comm. as he listens to Sven's good news, "That's great Sven! Tell Romelle congratulations for me."

Nodding to him, Sven replies, "She heard you…she just walked into the room." He turns his attention away from the screen for a moment then turns back, looking grim. "Romelle would like me to ask you something. I'd rather not."

Curious, Keith watches Sven move to the side slightly, as if someone shoved him. He notices his friend looking away, giving someone a dirty look. Finally, he asks, "What is it?"

Sven looks back at him and sighs, "Romelle has been unable to get Allura to answer her calls, so hasn't been able to tell her about the baby. She wants to know what's going on."

Keeping his tone impassive even as he feels intense anger welling up inside of him just at the mention of her name, Keith responds, "I wouldn't know. Tell Romelle to speak with Coran or Nanny."

"She has…" Sven answers as he glances to the side once more. "Apparently, they won't answer her either."

His anger finally slips into his eyes and tone as Keith states, "I can't help her, Sven."

"I know," his friend replies quietly. He finally smiles at him again, "I had best go…my wife just disappeared into the bathroom again. I swear, sometimes just moving wrong seems to make her sick."

Smiling again even if it does not reach his eyes, Keith nods to him, "I'll talk to you again soon." At Sven's nod, he turns off the video screen then looks down at his desk as he tries to rein in his anger. A knock at the door draws his attention as he calls out, "Enter." The door opens to reveal the doctor. Keith sits back in his chair startled at the appearance of the older man, "Dr. Gorma?"

The doctor waves his hand before the chair in front of him, "May I?"

Nodding, he gestures toward the chair, "Of course." He sits forward as Dr. Gorma sits down, "What can I do for you?" Keith watches the doctor look down as if struggling with something then he looks back up to say, "I need to speak to you about the queen."

Keith stiffens as anger once again infuses him but tilts his head to the side apprehensively, "Allura? What's wrong?"

Looking away from him, Dr. Gorma chooses his words carefully before facing the king to say, "Look this may seem like speaking out of turn, but as a doctor, I can't stand back and watch this happen without saying something."

Feeling his concern deepening, Keith asks, "What is it?"

The other man's expression shows his upset, "I have just visited the queen and I'm concerned because she is suffering from a serious bout of postpartum depression."

When the king says nothing and continues to watch him quietly, Dr. Gorma continues, "I know you don't have a normal marriage, Majesty, and I would normally never stick my nose into something like this, but you have to understand how dangerous this is."

Looking down as he tries to push his anger away, Keith takes a deep breath and releases it slowly before looking back at the doctor to ask, "What leads you to believe this?"

Audibly releasing a sigh of relief that the king is willing to listen, Dr. Gorma leans forward in the chair as he replies, "You know she was slightly depressed before the birth of your daughter." At Keith's stiff nod, he continues, "Since the birth and lack of support from the people around her…" he pauses briefly at the flash of anger in the king's eyes, "…the queen has been slowly pulling away from everything. According to her governess, she isn't sleeping well, won't get dressed or leave her bedroom. Nanny often enters the room to find her crying or her eyes red from crying and I was told she finally stopped speaking to Nanny or Coran altogether today. I spoke to Coran a few minutes ago and she hasn't performed her duties as queen in the last week. Thankfully, she is still eating and feeding the baby but if this goes untreated, she may turn away from the princess as well. Without help, I'm afraid the queen may become suicidal."

Sitting back in his chair again, Keith looks away from the doctor while thinking. He knows in his anger he has deliberately been staying away from Allura, but didn't know everyone else was as well. He has refused to speak of her with anyone since the marriage and most people, except Coran, Nanny and today Sven, were wise enough not to bring up her name in his presence. Grimacing, he thinks, '_Apparently, I should have listened to Coran last week when he approached me with paperwork Allura normally does…' _He finally looks back up, "What do you need from me?"

Dr. Gorma moves to the edge of his seat to get closer to the desk, "She feels isolated, which is only making the depression worse. In cases of postpartum depression, a woman needs support from her spouse and friends. I can give her something to help regulate the moods, but that won't help if she doesn't get the support. Her stress levels need to come down and she needs to get back to what you would call a normal existence, one that doesn't just include taking care of the princess."

Nodding, Keith pushes the chair back and slowly stands, "I'll check into this doctor and will let you know if I need help from you."

Following the king's lead, Dr. Gorma stands as well, "Thank you for listening to me," then turns and leaves the room.

Turning away from the door, Keith moves over to his window, places his arm against it then rests his forehead against his arm as he looks down on the castle grounds. Anger wars with the need to find out if what the doctor said was true. Moving his arm away, Keith hits his head against the glass in frustration. Decision made, he turns around and leaves his office.

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Walking down the hall later that afternoon, Keith's mind fights against his mixed feelings. He had spoken to Coran and Nanny independently after leaving his office only to have them confirm everything the doctor had said. While still angry and wishing he could stay away, Keith knows he cannot walk away from this, walk away from her. Approaching her room, he steels himself against the sudden flush of rage that fills him as he opens the door. Walking into the bedroom, he finds Allura lying on the bed, turned away from him. He walks around the bed and looks down. She has their daughter lying beside her, dangling a ribbon above her while watching her face. Keith sits down on the end of the bed and watches her as she sets the ribbon down then kisses the baby.

Leaning against one of the canopy poles, Keith looks Allura over. While she appears clean, she is still in her nightgown and it looks like she hasn't bothered to brush her hair in days. She has dark circles under her eyes and her skin has a pale, sickly look to it. Even with him staring pointedly at her, she continues to deliberately ignore him. Irritated by it, he finally asks, "What's going on with you, Allura?"

The queen does not answer him. Instead, she continues to run her fingers along the Adrienne's cheek then picks the ribbon back up and dangles it in front of her again. Keith watches her for a moment as irritation continues to fill him. Reaching forward, he grabs the hand holding the ribbon, "Allura, I asked you a question. The least you can do is to answer me."

Her eyes drift to his briefly and he notices the tears slowly filling them before she turns back to the baby and gently pulls her hand away from him. He watches her slowly curl into a ball as if to protect herself, her knees rising up near his daughter. Forcing himself to calm down, Keith sits back against the bed rest and tries again, "You have everyone worried Allura. Coran brought me your work last week when you refused to do it. He told me today that you stopped talking to him entirely. Nanny is concerned that you won't get dressed or leave this room."

Allura closes her eyes briefly then holds the ribbon back up for her daughter again. Staring into her face, she finally whispers, "No one else has missed me," her voice breaks, "No one else cares."

Crossing his arms in disgust, Keith snorts, "Allura, we all care about you. We are angry with you but that doesn't mean we don't care."

Closing her eyes against the tears she feels forming, she shakes her head then whispers, "I kept hearing everyone whisper that you must love me. Why would you do all those things for me, spend so much time with me and save me so many times if you didn't love me?"

Wordlessly confused, Keith stares down at her, wondering where the change in subject came from until she continues, "Then you found a girlfriend and didn't have time for me anymore. Still, I heard Hunk telling Pidge that you weren't serious over that girl, that you never get serious over a girl."

She starts to cry in earnest, the tears flowing down her cheeks, "Do you know how painful it is to watch someone you love hold hands with another woman…to hug her and kiss her…then finally to have to watch him ask that woman to marry him?"

Keith's jaw drops as he sits up completely shocked, "Allura!"

Finally, her eyes open and she looks at him pleadingly, tears still running down her cheeks, "I never meant to hurt you. I drugged you because I needed to know what it was like for you to love me for one night before being forced to marry someone else." Her breath hitches, "I felt so guilty after…I couldn't concentrate on anything for more than a few minutes at a time…and I would remember again."

She sucks in air while trying to speak past the tears, "Then when I found out I was pregnant, I was happy for a short time. I would have a part of you that would love me and never leave me. But after a while, it was just another reminder what I had done." She puts her head down and kisses the baby's head then sobs, "You were supposed to love me. You were supposed…to…love…me." Her eyes close again as she pushes her head into the mattress while sobbing.

Closing his eyes, Keith turns his face away as he thinks, '_All this time I've been hurting her and never knew it…'_ He reopens his eyes, wipes away the tear running down his cheeks, looks first at his daughter then at her mother. Leaning forward, Keith pulls his wife up against his chest, "I'm so sorry Allura." Wrapping his arms around her, he holds her tight as she continues to cry. Feeling her pain, he kisses the top of her head.

As Allura slowly quiets down, Keith looks up when Adrienne starts fussing. She shifts away from him to lie back down next to the baby, touching her cheeks while trying to quiet her. Keith watches his wife as she refuses to meet his gaze while opening her gown and tries to feed the baby. However, Adrienne does not latch onto her breast and continues to fuss.

Sighing, Keith reaches forward to take Adrienne away from her, holding her against his chest while patting her back, "She won't feed from you right now, Allura. She can sense that you are upset."

Rising from the bed, Keith walks to the nursery door with Adrienne. He opens it and pushes a button for a servant. When Nanny enters the room, he hands her the baby, "Can you give her a bottle please, Nanny." The governess nods then walks away with Adrienne as Keith re-enters the bedroom, closing the door to the nursery.

Walking back over to the bed, he finds Allura curled up into a ball, tears still sliding down her cheeks. Sitting down next to her, Keith uses his fingers to wipe the tears from her eyes, "Don't cry Allura." He lies down beside her, pulls her into his arms, and holds her close as she hides her face in his neck.

Keith holds her until he senses she has stopped crying. Loosening his arm, he whispers her name, "Allura?"

She shudders against him but does not speak as her fingers dig into his back. Keith sits up and pulls her up against his chest then forces her chin up to look him in the eyes, "Why didn't you ever say something to me before now?"

Closing her eyes against the probing, dark depths of his gaze, Allura quietly answers, "The few times I managed to draw enough courage to try to tell you and I was able to get you alone, someone else would come into the room or your comm. unit would go off or Lotor would attack." She pauses to suck in a deep breath then finishes, "And I was afraid you wouldn't feel the same," before she opens her eyes and looks at him again, hoping for understanding.

Looking away toward the window, the king remembers some of the instances she referred to…the one on the balcony during Prince Ty's visit the freshest. He can still remember his anger at Nanny when the older woman had interrupted them before Allura could tell him what had been bothering her. Keith shakes his head as he looks back down at her. Running a hand over her tangled hair, he sighs, "I remember…" Another memory suddenly flashes through his mind from the day after Christmas when he spoke to her in MedTech.

"_Do you love him?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Does he love you?"_

"_I…I…wanted him…to."_

He tightens his hold on her then reaches down with his other hand and touches her cheek, caressing it. Studying her face, it takes him a few moments before he informs her, "Allura, what you need to understand is that not long after we arrived here, Coran took me aside and explained to me that you were off limits to all of us. You needed to marry a prince and secure Arus' future at some point so we, the Force and I, were not to do anything that would prevent that from happening."

Grimacing, he remembers the conversation vividly and the angry responses of some of his men as he relayed the message. Looking back to the window and the blue skies it shows, he continues, "To that end, I could not allow myself to become attached to you, Allura." Turning his gaze back to his wife, he wipes another tear from her cheek, "While I cared about you, I could not allow myself to love you. Therefore, I never viewed you as anything other than a friend. I didn't know you felt that way about me, which is why I didn't know how much pain I was inflicting on you while I was with Beth."

Allura shudders again, closes her eyes then pushes her face back into his chest as her fingers dig into his side. She sniffles then lifts her head to look at him as she whispers, "What do we do now?"

Moving his eyes over her face for a moment more, Keith looks away as he says, "We start over." He looks back down at her then sits up and pulls her up into a sitting position as well. Looking intently into her eyes, he says, "We are married Allura and we have a child. We need to find a way to live together without hurting each other." His gaze turns even more serious, "I need to be able to trust you again."

She looks away as shame fills her. Keith grabs her chin, forcing her to look at him, "You need to learn to talk to me. I may get upset with you sometimes and not like what you have to say, but I will listen. No more hiding and no more secrets, Allura…they will be the death of us."

He watches her suck in a trembling breath as she nods then Keith releases her chin and turns, looking at the clock. "Dinner is in an hour. Go get a bath, get dressed and I will escort you to dinner."

Fear fills her eyes and if possible, her pallor fades even more. Keith cups her cheek with his hand, "It will be all right, Allura. I'll be with you." He leans forward, kissing her other cheek, "Now, go get your bath." The fear recedes as Allura slowly nods then crawls off the bed, heading for the bathroom.

His gaze follows her until the bathroom door closes behind her. Keith draws in a deep breath as he lowers his head to his chest and closes his eyes. Releasing it, he opens his eyes to find something sticking out from under Allura's pillow. Reaching forward, he pulls it out to find a picture viewer. Hitting the button to turn it on, he finds a picture taken of him and Allura shortly after he had arrived. His arm had been around her back as he looked at her with a smile on his face. Shaking his head at it, Keith hits the button to forward onto the next picture only to find another one of him. Continuing to flip through them, he discovers most of the shots are of him, outside of a few taken of the entire team. When he reaches the first photo again, he turns the system off then slips it back under her pillow.

He looks back over at the closed bathroom door as he whispers, "Oh Allura…why didn't you say something to me sooner?" Sighing sadly, Keith rises from the bed and walks into the nursery. He moves over to the crib to look down on his daughter, who is moving in her crib, her little arms waving in the air. Studying her closely, he thinks, '_You have your mother's eyes.' _Leaning over the crib, Keith caresses her cheek, "You are so like your mother…" He stiffens when he hears a voice behind him, "I think you will find she is much like you as well."

Smiling broadly at him, Nanny steps forward into the room. She walks over by Keith and smiles down on the little princess, "Obviously she looks a lot like you, but I've noticed her temper is somewhat like yours as well." Giving him an evil look, the governess adds, "While she cannot make threats yet, she does scream her displeasure the same way you do…"

Turning his gaze to Nanny, Keith lifts an eyebrow at her sarcastically. Nanny laughs at him as she pats his arm, "You will survive it…" Shaking his head, a smile flits across his face as he asks, "Nanny, can you please go help Allura bathe and dress?" She pats his arm again and nods, "Of course," then leaves the room.

Reaching into the crib, Keith picks up his daughter and kisses her before pulling her close to him and smelling her hair. As he inhales her clean baby smell, he smiles and cradles her in his arms as he walks out of the nursery and down the hall to find the guys.


	12. Chapter 12

Many thanks for all the reviews last chapter! It's great to hear from all of you. K, while I know you want to see Origins 2...I'm still studying for my Windows 7 Certification test. About as dry and boring of a study as you can imagine and the test is expensive, so want to get it right the first time. I'll try to get there soon.

Mertz

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 12

Sitting in the rec room, Keith studies his daughter, smiling as she reaches up to him as Lance herds the Force into the room. Looking up, he finds them staring at him in surprise. Hunk slowly approaches then sits down beside him. His gaze moves over the baby in his friend's arms before he asks, "What's going on Cap?"

Once everyone is seated, Keith finally starts to explain, "I had a visitor today…Dr. Gorma."

Studying him closely, Lance inquires, "I take it, he is the reason you've gathered us here?"

Keith sighs as he lays Adrienne against his chest, patting her back as she settles down, "Yes. Allura is suffering from a serious bout of postpartum depression."

The group listens to Lance swearing loudly as he jumps up from his seat and starts pacing the room. Grimacing, Michael relays, "My sister suffered from that after the birth of her first child, it wasn't pretty. How bad is the queen?"

Looking over his men, Keith answers, "Bad enough that the doctor is worried about her becoming suicidal." Lance returns to his swearing as Keith shifts the baby when she begins fussing. He sighs deeply, "After seeing her this afternoon, I understand his concern."

Stopping his pacing, Lance moves in front of his friend, "You went to her?"

"Yes," replies the king as he moves a hand over his daughter's head, "I had no choice after talking to Dr. Gorma. I won't have her death on my conscious because I couldn't get past my own issues. Getting her through this is now my top priority."

Clearing his throat to gain his friend's attention, Hunk asks, "What do you need us to do, Keith?"

Looking around the room at his friends, Keith pleads with them, "According to Dr. Gorma, she needs support from all of us, so help me with her. Go see her, talk to her, whatever you guys used to do before all this happened. I need to get her back on her feet and moving, but I can't be there all the time. I'm going to need you guys to let her lean on you if you see she needs help."

Turning his attention back to Lance, he inquires, "Any chance Christine would be willing to try to befriend her? Another woman to talk to might help her."

Grimacing, Lance replies, "Allura has never been Christine's favorite person, but I'll talk to her about it." He almost looks apologetic, "I can't promise anything. You know how close she was to Beth."

Looking away at the sound of his former fiancée's name, Keith turn his attention back to his daughter again as she begins fussing more. Pidge breaks the silence, "What are the symptoms of her depression?"

Shifting Adrienne to his shoulder, Keith pats her back then looks back up to answer, "Not sleeping well and very withdrawn. She doesn't want to dress or leave her room. Crying jags. I'm forcing her to come to dinner tonight. I need all of you to try to treat her as normally as possible."

Everyone nods then gets up to leave the room. Keith calls out, "Lance, hang around for a minute please."

Their gazes lock and Lance nods then moves back over to the seat across from Keith's as everyone else leaves. Once the room is empty, Keith looks at his best friend, "Were you ever aware that Allura was attracted to me or in love with me?"

Surprised, Lance's eyebrows go up, "Not really. I sometimes wondered when I would occasionally catch her staring at you, but she is really good at hiding those kinds of things. Besides, I would have thought that after Coran's warning to us, she would have gotten the same lecture."

Keith kisses the top of his daughter's head then sighs out, "She told me why she drugged me."

Studying his friend incredulously, Lance sarcastically answers, "Because she was in love with you?"

Looking back up at him, Keith's expression shines with his dismay as he replies, "Yes. Every time she saw me with Beth was like a knife going into her heart. Then with Coran after her to marry for political gain, she felt she needed to be with the man she loved for one night. She didn't think about the possibility that she could get pregnant."

Lance shakes his head in disgust, "So to protect you and her little secret, she refused to name the father of her child."

Nodding, the king speculates, "You know…I don't think we would know even now if Adrienne didn't look like me."

Humorless laughter escapes Lance as he crosses his arms in front of himself while saying, "Wow…what a fucking mess."

"I can't hurt her anymore…"

Hearing the sad tone, Lance looks back at him puzzled, "What do you mean by that?"

Keith's gaze becomes intense as he answers, "I've inflicted more pain on her than I ever want to know. I'm going to have to try to make this marriage work, for her sake as well as mine."

His expression becomes neutral as Lance studies him closely. Finally, he asks, "So after everything she put you through, you are just going to forget about what she did?"

A flash of anger goes through Keith's eyes then it is gone just as quickly as he says, "Yes. I have to forgive her for that and let it go."

Nodding, the lieutenant asks his next questions, "Do you really think you can make both of you happy?"

Taking a deep breath, Keith's eyes hold nothing but determination as he replies, "I have to." Patting his daughter's back, he adds, "For more than one reason."

Sighing, Lance rises to his feet, "I'll go speak with Christine before dinner. Hopefully, she will understand what motivated Allura and look past it."

"Thanks Lance…" sighs Keith as his friend moves around the chair then leaves the room. Turning his attention to his daughter once more as she resumes fussing, he says, "Let's go see about finding you a clean diaper and perhaps a bottle." Kissing her forehead, he rises then makes his way out of the rec room.

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Coming out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel, Allura pauses when she sees her governess standing there. The older woman smiles at her as she holds out a dress, "I thought you might want to wear this one for dinner."

The queen's eyes move over the light green dress with the button down front then she looks apprehensively back at her governess. Nanny points out the advantage of the buttons in the front, "This way if the princess becomes hungry, you will not have to fully undress to feed her."

She watches the young woman closely as she continues to stare at the dress then she finally nods. Relieved, Nanny directs her to the vanity, "Please sit Majesty. I'll help you with your hair."

Feeling herself trembling, Allura sits down on the seat then looks into the mirror as Nanny begins to brush her hair. Having avoided looking in a mirror the last couple of weeks, the sight in front of her leaves her wide eyed with shock. Her normally perfect, rosy colored skin looks pale and her cheeks look gaunt. Her dull blue eyes suddenly look too big for her face. Tears surface then slide down her cheeks as she looks up then reaches up to touch her limp, lifeless hair.

"Oh Allura…do not cry."

She feels her governess' arms move around her, "It will all be all right again. You shall see!"

Before Allura can reply, the older woman stands back up and once again runs the brush through her hair, "When I am finished, you will feel better!"

Sucking in a sobering breath, Allura nods to her then reaches forward for a bottle of moisturizer. Pouring a small amount onto her hand, she rubs it into the skin on her face. Finished, she looks down at the makeup then back at her governess as nervousness fills her. When the older woman smiles reassuringly at her, Allura picks up her bottle of cover-up and begins applying it.

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"I can't believe you are asking this of me, Lance," Christine stands with her hands on her hips, her eyes flashing her anger with her husband.

Trying to keep his expression neutral, Lance approaches his wife and tries to grasp her arms but she pulls back from him. He sighs, "Christine, please try to understand." Reaching down, his fingers find her chin, forcing her to look up at him, "Put yourself in her place for a moment. What would it do to you if you had to watch me with another woman? Kissing her, hugging her and then having to watch me ask her to marry me during Christmas?"

Christine pulls her chin out of his hand then turns away from Lance, wrapping her arms around her waist before whispering, "It would kill me."

Walking up behind her, Lance wraps his arms around her then kisses her neck. Resting his chin on her shoulder, he whispers into her ear, "I don't condone what she did Christine, but I do understand what motivated her. Right now, she needs friends desperately and another woman who could understand the pain she is in especially. Please, for my sake, help my friend."

Sighing, she turns in his arms to kiss him. Pulling back, Christine stares up at him then gives in, "All right, I'll try. But you are forgetting she may not want to be friends with me when she knows I am friends with Beth."

Lance smiles winsomely at her, "I have complete faith in your abilities. After all, you won me over."

Rolling her eyes, Christine finally laughs when Lance leans in to tease her lips with a kiss before saying, "Let's get to the dining room." Nodding to him, she takes his hand as he leads her out of the room.

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Finishing brushing back his hair, Keith leaves his bedroom then makes his way down the hall toward his wife's. He enters Allura's bedroom to find her pacing in agitation by the window. Closely looking her over, he cringes inwardly when he notices the dress hangs on her frame, '_Shit, she was supposed to have been eating. I didn't realize she had lost weight besides…'_ He continues to study her. Nanny had done wonders with her hair and he can tell she was wearing some makeup to try to hide her pale face and the dark circles under her eyes.

She stops pacing as he nears her. Managing a smile, Keith asks, "Ready for dinner?"

A look of panic enters her eyes as she begins wringing her hands, "I can't do this…"

Keith grasps her hands within his and looks deeply into her eyes, "Yes, you can and I'll be right beside you." He moves one hand to caress her cheek, "You will be all right Allura."

Wrapping an arm around her waist, he guides her out of her bedroom. They walk together down the hall, her steps faltering as they approach the dining room door. He forces her to walk forward and they enter the room to find everyone else already there.

Standing near the window with his wife, Lance notices their arrival and starts to approach them. His steps falter for a second as he looks Allura over before recovering to smile at her. '_Shit…she looks like a ghost of herself…'_ He stops in front of them, "Long time no see stranger," while maintaining the smile. Allura's eyes briefly meet his and he can see the panic forming in them as she starts to tremble. Lance pulls her toward him, hugging her, his eyes flying to Keith's as he grimaces.

Across the room, Hunk and Pidge are watching the exchange and are equally shocked by Allura's appearance. Hunk cringes as she pulls back from Lance and steps back toward Keith, who wraps his arm back around her waist as if to keep her from running away.

Feeling her trembling against him, Keith turns his head to whisper into her ear, "Let's go sit down," then leads her to the table. He holds out a seat for Allura then pushes it in as she sits down. Sitting beside her, he glances sideways to find her eyes darting around the room, as if looking for an escape.

Michael watches her until her eyes finally rest on him. Smiling, he greets her, "Good evening, Majesty."

She does not answer him, instead Allura watches him for a moment then looks at her husband as Keith places a comforting hand on her arm then looks around the room again as everyone else takes their seats. From across the table, Christine watches the queen and can understand why everyone is concerned, given her appearance. She glances sideways at Lance, who is also watching Allura, concern etched across his features. Looking back, she watches Keith reach over and caress his wife's cheek, trying to get her to relax.

Once dinner is served and the conversation flows around the table, Allura nervously sits in her chair and picks at her food with her fork. With her head down, her eyes dart from side to side as she watches the people around her. Only the comfort of Keith sitting next to her keeps her from rising and leaving the room. Turning her head slightly, she looks out the corner of her eyes toward her husband. Allura focuses on his hands, admiring the strength of them as he cuts up his meat.

Feeling the heat of her gaze, Keith finishes answering Michael's question then turns his attention to his wife. He catches her startled movement as she pulls away from him then watches her resume pushing her food around her plate, not really eating. Sighing, he leans toward her to whisper in her ear, "Eat Allura, please," She turns her face toward him, looking into his eyes as he leans toward her again then kisses her cheek, "For me…please eat."

Her eyes move over his face again then Allura nods and turns back to her plate. She hesitantly takes a bite, chewing it slowly as Keith turns back toward his own plate, his eyes meeting Lance's across the table as they share a grimace.

Finishing his dinner ten minutes later, Keith glances around the table to find everyone else finishing up then looks at Allura's plate. Disappointed to find only a third of it gone and her fork lying beside the plate, he whispers to her, "Can you eat any more?"

Refusing to look at him, she shakes her head, leaving him to sigh. Reaching forward, Keith caresses her cheek until Allura finally looks at him. A small smile crosses his face as he reassures her, "It's all right Allura."

"Movie anyone?"

Lance's question brings his attention back around, Keith watches everyone nod as they rise from their chairs then turns back to his wife, "Want to watch a movie?"

She looks away from him to find Lance staring at her, while the rest seem to be doing their best not to look at her. Turning back to her husband, Allura quietly answers, "Yes."

Feeling his smile growing, Keith rises from his seat then takes her hand within his to help her rise as well. They walk with the group to the rec room then he sits beside Allura on one of the couches. As Lance gets the movie ready, Nanny enters the room with a crying Adrienne. Keith rises and takes his daughter from the older woman, who exclaims, "It's her feeding time, Majesty."

She looks over to queen, "Come, I'll walk you back to your room." Allura starts to rise but stops when Keith turns toward her, "Sit back down Allura. You can feed her here."

The governess starts to sputter about it being indecent but stops when Keith turns back to her, his angry gaze quieting her, "Nanny, she will feed Adrienne here. A blanket will cover her and she will be perfectly decent, please leave." Nanny turns red as anger fills her but she turns around and leaves the room. Sighing as the door closes behind her, Keith returns to Allura's side and hands her the baby.

Lance wisely starts the movie so everyone's attention goes to the screen as Keith takes a lap blanket off the back of the seat then drapes it over Allura and the baby as she reaches in, undoes the front of her gown and begins feeding the baby. Sitting back down next to her, Keith drapes his arm around her shoulders and lightly rubs her arm as he turns his attention to the movie.

Once she finishes feeding Adrienne, Keith takes the baby from Allura then drapes her across his chest as he gently pats her back. Allura closes her gown as she watches her husband's hand moving gently back and forth their daughter's back, a look of envy in her eyes. Turning his head in time to catch the expression, Keith pulls her against him as well then murmurs to her, "Rest against me, it's all right."

Turning her body toward him, Allura lays her head against his shoulder then places her hand on top of his on the baby's back. Inhaling the spicy sent of him, she closes her eyes while listening to the sound of his heartbeat. It does not take long for exhaustion to overtake her and Allura falls asleep, her hand sliding off Adrienne's back and into Keith's lap.

Turning his head toward her, Keith listens to the sound of her deep breathing and sighs as he runs his free hand up and down her back. Ignoring the movie, his mind goes over the day's events and he sighs deeply. When the movies ends forty minutes later, he rubs Allura's back briskly while saying her name, but she does not stir.

Watching him from another couch, amusement fills Lance at the image of Keith's dilemma. "So how are you going to get out of that one?"

Rolling his eyes at his friend in answer, Keith turns his attention to a different team member, "Pidge, would you mind taking Adrienne down to the nursery and putting her in her crib?" Pidge crosses the room to take the princess. As the baby stirs slightly, he settles her against his shoulder then pats her back as he leaves the room.

Hunk and Michael rise from their seats, say good night then follow Pidge out the door. Once the room has cleared, Lance looks briefly at Christine then at back at his friend to swear, "Jesus Keith…you could have mentioned how bad she looked."

Grimacing as he runs a hand down Allura's hair, Keith answers, "I didn't realize how bad she looked until she was dressed. I was told she had been eating at least." Swearing broadly, he adds, "She looks like she needs to regain at least twenty pounds." Sitting up, Keith turns toward her, pulling her into his arms as he slowly stands. Allura sighs in her sleep then pushes her face into his neck.

Standing up as well, Lance reaches out and pulls her hair out of her face, hair that looked limp and unhealthy. His eyes find Keith's again, "I should have never left her alone like that. I could understand why you did, but I'm supposed to be her friend and I just abandoned her."

Christine quickly leaves her seat and moves to him, hugging her husband from behind as Keith sighs, "You felt just as betrayed by her as I did Lance…this is my fault not yours. I should have at least been making sure she was all right, but I couldn't see past my own anger. The signs were already there the last night Romelle and Sven were here."

Walking around Lance to face both of them, Christine snaps, "Stop it, you idiots…quit trying to blame yourselves for something that you couldn't help. You are both only human, you were both angry with her and had every right to be."

As Lance opens his mouth to argue with her, Christine holds up her hand, "I mean it Lance…you had the right to be angry with her. So stop beating yourselves up for it and worry about getting her well again."

Smiling as he watches Lance open his mouth then close it again, completely speechless, Keith remarks, "You have a very smart wife, Lance…"

Pulling Christine into his arms for a hug, he sighs, "Thank God she is smart enough for both of us…"

Sighing while glancing sideways at his own wife, Keith shifts Allura's weight then says, "I better get her to bed. See you two in the morning."

He leaves the rec room then walks down the hall to Allura's room. Entering the room, Keith lays her down on the bed. Taking a spare blanket from the end of the bed, he covers her with it then sits beside her and watches her sleep. Studying her, his mind a jumble of colliding thoughts, Keith tenderly pushes her hair off of her face , caresses her cheek, then leans down to kiss her forehead before standing and leaving the room.


	13. Chapter 13

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 13

Awakening the next morning to the sound of her daughter's cries, Allura glances around the room confused. The door to the nursery opens to reveal her governess as she carries Adrienne in to be fed. Holding her arms out, she accepts her daughter and kisses her cheek. Looking down, she is confused to see she is still dressed in the same gown from yesterday. Surprised that Nanny didn't say something to her about sleeping in her clothes, she opens the gown then begins feeding the baby.

Looking down into her face as she suckles, Allura lets her mind float to the night before. The last memory she has is of curling into Keith before falling asleep. Looking about the room, she realizes he must have carried her back to her room last night. Glancing beside her, she is saddened to see the other pillow on her bed was unused.

Turning her attention to her governess as the other woman straightens her room, Allura asks, "Where is Keith?"

Nanny stops to look at her. A smile forms on her face as she replies, "Out in the lions, Majesty."

A look at the clock tells Allura that it is the normal practice time and she sighs. Her concentration is interrupted as Adrienne begins fussing. Smiling down at her daughter for the first time in days, Allura whispers, "It is all right sweetie…" then turns her full attention back to getting the baby fed.

Once Adrienne is taken care of, Allura takes a bath. Walking back into her room, she finds Nanny waiting for her with the hairbrush in her hand. Nodding, the queen sits down at the vanity and enjoys her old governess' ministrations as she brushes her hair.

Twenty minutes later, dressed in a pantsuit, Allura glances at the clock then leaves her room. She walks to the dining room to find it empty. Frowning, she walks to castle control, only to find Coran seated at the controls. Before he notices she is there, Allura turns and leaves the room, heading toward Keith's office. Knocking, she enters the room to find it empty as well. Starting to feel panicky, she heads toward the rec room.

Entering the room to find it empty as the others, tears start down her cheeks. She turns as the door opens behind her to find Christine walking in. The other woman stops just inside the doorway, a bit shocked to find Allura standing in the middle of the room crying. Rushing forward, she inquires, "Allura, are you all right?"

Allura looks at her briefly then turns away, unable to stop herself from sobbing out and slowly sinking to the floor. Christine quickly joins her on the floor, demanding, "Allura, what's wrong?"

Unable to speak, the queen closes her eyes and continues to sob as Christine finally pulls her toward her, hugging her. "It's all right Allura…" She strokes her hair and back, trying to calm her down as Allura continues to sob.

A few minutes later, the door opens just before Keith and Lance walk into the room talking. They both stop when they see the women sitting on the floor. Christine looks back at them, gesturing frantically to Keith. The king quickly walks over to them, reaches down for Allura and pulls her up into his arms. Tightening his grip on her as another sob escapes his wife, he moves to one of the sofas and sits down on it with her.

Looking away from the couple on the couch, Lance approaches Christine to help her up off the floor while asking, "What happened?"

Shrugging, Christine answers, "I don't know. I entered the room to find her standing in the middle of it crying. I haven't been able to calm her down. She just had a complete meltdown."

Keith grimaces as he rubs his wife's back. Placing a kiss on her forehead, he murmurs, "What's wrong Allura?"

She does not answer. Instead, Allura burrows her face more into his neck and clings to him. He finally looks back at Lance, "Can you give us some privacy please?"

Nodding, Lance takes Christine's hand and guides her out of the room. Keith pulls his wife away from him and forces her to look him in the face, "Allura, remember when I said you have to talk to me? I can't help you if you don't talk to me."

Turning her head away, the queen takes a deep sobbing breath. Keith wipes the tears from her cheeks. Leaning forward, he kisses her forehead again, "Talk to me…what's wrong?"

Allura sniffles while trying to calm down. Wiping at the wetness still residing on her cheeks, she stutters, "I don't know…I don't…know…" She takes several deep breaths before looking him in the eyes, "I was alone…I…I couldn't find you…anywhere…" then buries her face in his neck again.

Letting out a deep breath, Keith wraps his arms around her, holding her tightly to him. '_She panicked because she couldn't find me…' _he thinks as he slouches back on the seat, letting Allura's body drape across his while rubbing her back with his free hand. After a while, he kisses the top of her head then asks, "Did you eat anything this morning?"

When she shakes her head in answer, Keith sits up. He pushes her up then rises to his feet, "Come on…" Holding her hand within his, he leads her out of the room, heading toward the kitchen. They enter the room to find Nanny overseeing lunch preparations.

The king looks back at Allura, squeezes her hand and smiles at her before facing Nanny, "Allura missed breakfast, Nanny. Do you have anything readily available?"

Nodding, the governess gestures to an open table in the room, "Please sit down, Majesties. I will bring food to you."

Keith guides his wife to the table and sits down beside her as Nanny approaches with a tray. Upon it are various pieces of fresh fruit, bagels, jars of jam and a glass of milk. She sits it down in front of them and smiles at Allura, "Anything else?"

When Allura refuses to acknowledge her, Keith shakes his head, "No Nanny, that's great. Thanks!"

He takes one of the bagels and spreads some jam on it then hands it to Allura, "Eat this." She takes the bagel from him as he grabs a second one and puts jam on it before eating it himself. Next, he takes a strawberry and hands it to her, which she eats between bites of bagel. Keith keeps handing her different pieces of fruit, occasionally sticking one in his own mouth. Finally, she shakes her head at him, refusing to eat anymore.

Studying her for a moment, Keith decides that while she didn't eat as much as he would have liked her to, at least she ate. Reaching for the glass of milk, he takes a drink then hands it to her, "Finish it."

Staring at him until he arches an eyebrow at her, Allura finally sighs then drinks the remainder of the milk as instructed. Afterward, Keith stands, helps her to her feet, and thanks Nanny again before leading her out of the room. He guides her back to the rec room then to one of the sofas. Releasing his hold on her elbow, Keith crosses the room, puts in a movie before returning to his wife's side. He sits sideways on the couch, with his back to the armrest and stretches his legs out. After, he holds out a hand to Allura. When she takes his hand, he pulls her down so she is seated between his legs, her head resting against his chest. Keith wraps an arm around her waist then begins watching the movie.

Allura sighs as she tries to watch the movie. She finally lets her head drift sideways and listens to Keith's heartbeat. Soon, her eyes drift shut and she falls asleep. Keith smiles as her head turns even more to the side in sleep and shifts slightly to make her more comfortable then returns his attention to the movie.

A short time later, the door to the rec room opens as Nanny carries in a crying Adrienne. Allura's eyes immediately open at the sound of the crying infant and she sits up as the older woman approaches them, "I take it you are going to feed her in here again?"

Feeling a smile slipping across his face at the irritated expression on Nanny's face as Allura nods, Keith settles himself back against the cushion behind him. Allura takes the baby from her then once again leans back against his chest. Nanny sniffs in disapproval as she turns and leaves the room. Keith laughs at her departing back as he wraps his arms around his wife and child while Allura undoes her shirt. Once the baby has started feeding, he pulls the blanket off the back of the couch beside them and covers them in case someone else enters the room.

Temptation filling him, he pushes the blanket to the side to watch his daughter feed. Allura stiffens slightly and blushes, causing Keith to smile and kiss the side of her head. Before he can comment, the castle alarms go off.

Quickly sitting up and pushing Allura forward, Keith extracts himself from the couch. He turns to run, stops suddenly to look back at his wife and orders, "Stay here." Keith rushes toward the windows, hits the button to raise the blast shields before finally running out of the room.

Hurrying down the hallways, he reaches castle control, entering the room just as Coran turns in the command chair, "Lotor is attacking. A robeast has been released just outside of the castle."

Keith looks over to his men, "Let's go!" as they all take off for their tubes.

Once in the lions, the Force start going after the robeast even as several fighters begin firing on the castle. Coran cringes as he orders, "Open castle defenses and return fire!"

Turning Black lion midair while dodging fire from the robeast, Keith shoots down several of the fighters before ordering, "Let's form Voltron and take care of this thing." He starts to push the lion up into the air then stops suddenly when he notices a fighter sends several missiles at the castle, He screams as they blow up, "CORAN! Those missiles hit near the rec room! I left Allura and the baby in there!"

Looking up at the screen in horror, Coran yells "NO!" before turning and running out of castle control. Christine looks to the doors the older man disappeared through then runs up to the controls as she hears Keith's voice on the comm. yelling for the advisor again. Sitting down in the chair, she grabs the microphone, "Keith, Coran ran out of the room."

About to turn his lion toward the castle, Keith stops when he hears Lance yell, "Keith dammit! Get your head back into this battle or we will all be dead!"

Tears run down his face as Keith turns the lion back to the group and flies up into the air to form Voltron.

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Running down the hall, Coran can feel his heart in his throat. As he approaches the rec room, he can see the smoke from the fires started by the missiles as several of the palace guard run up with hoses to put them out. Coran is about to yell Allura's name but he stops when he hears the baby crying. Continuing the rest of the way down the hall to the rec room, he finds Allura near a wall outside of the room, lying unconscious on the floor. The princess is lying on the floor next her, screaming.

He drops down on his knees next to Allura and pulls her over to find a nasty gash on her forehead. Checking her neck for a pulse, the advisor sighs in relief as he pulls her up to him. He looks down on the baby, who looks unharmed, then yells at one of the guards, "Get the queen to MedTech!"

A guard drops the hose and runs to Coran, picks up Allura then runs down the hall with her. Coran picks up the screaming baby and holds her close to him trying to comfort her as he stands and runs back down the hall toward castle control.

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Turning Voltron away to avoid missiles shot from the robeast, Keith yells, "Form blazing sword!" as the weapon forms between red and green lions' mouths. He moves Voltron quickly forward to rush the robeast and swings the sword, cutting off the beast's arm. He jumps Voltron back as the robeast fires several more missiles at them from its belly then runs at the robeast again, this time cutting it in half. He moves Voltron away from the robeast as it explodes.

Feeling the adrenalin still streaming through him, Keith hits the necessary buttons while saying, "Disengaging Voltron." As the lions come apart, Coran's voice is once again on the comm. with the sound of a screaming baby in the background, "Keith, the princess is fine. Allura hit her head and was still unconscious when I sent her to MedTech."

Relief fills Keith as he watches the other lions destroy the few remaining fighters while Lotor's command ship turns and leaves Arus airspace. Leaving the fight, he returns Black lion to his pedestal and quickly returns to castle control. He steps into the room to find Christine trying to calm down his crying daughter. Ignoring Coran's call to him, Keith turns and runs out of the room.

Reaching MedTech in record time, the king runs into the exam room Dr. Gorma and his wife occupy. Crying out, "ALLURA!" he rushes toward the bed as the doctor turns to him. Putting a hand on his arm to stop him, Dr. Gorma reassures him, "She will be fine, Majesty. The queen has a slight concussion, but she will be fine. I gave her a shot for it already to stabilize her."

Pulling away from the doctor, Keith bends down to pull his wife up into his arms. Holding her against his chest, he watches her eyes flutter open and she hazily murmurs, "Keith?"

Relief floods him as Keith tightens his hold on her. Bending toward her, he kisses her forehead. Hearing a pained noise coming out of Allura, he pulls back and looks at her head. A bandage covers the wound on her forehead that he had accidentally brushed with his kiss. Smiling regretfully, Keith apologizes as he caresses her cheek, "Sorry sweetheart."

Allura's eyes finally open wide as she becomes cognizant, find his then she sits up panicked, "Adrienne!"

Grabbing her to stop her from trying to rise, he explains, "She is fine, Allura. A bit upset, but fine. What happened?"

Staring up into her husband's face while trying to remember, Allura grasps for the memory as she replies, "She had finished eating…I decided…to go to…castle control." She pauses a moment then looks back at him as the memories return, "I wanted to see what was going on. I just stepped out of the room when I heard a loud noise behind me. That's all I remember…"

Shuddering at how close he had come to losing his family, Keith pulls her close to him again as Lance enters the room carrying Adrienne, followed by Christine. Patting the baby's back as she continues to whimper in his arms, he looks them over, asking, "Is she all right?"

Nodding in answer while still holding his wife, Keith suddenly turns his attention to Lance as he approaches the bed. Adrienne starts crying loudly again, gaining her mother's attention as Allura pulls away from Keith to take her from the lieutenant. Holding her daughter close to her chest, she does not resist her husband as he pulls both of them against him once more. Lance smiles at the family then wrapping an arm around Christine's waist, he turns them around and they exit the room.

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To be on the safe side, Dr. Gorma kept Allura for several hours and checked out Adrienne as well before releasing both mother and daughter from MedTech…just in time for Keith to get them to bed for the night. Still shaken from the events of the day, Keith keeps an arm around his wife as he guides her to her room. Allura cuddles a sleeping Adrienne closer to her as she walks down the hall. She sighs in content when Keith's arm tightens around her waist again.

As they enter her room, Keith whispers, "Hand me Adrienne, I'll take care of her while you go change for bed."

Reluctantly, Allura hands him the baby then takes a nightgown out of her closet and enters the bathroom to change. When she re-enters her room several minutes later, she is shocked to see Keith lying on her bed, their daughter beside him. Slowly approaching the bed, she watches Keith as his eyes moves from Adrienne to her. The intensity of his gaze rivets her in place until he holds out his hand. Allura takes it then lies down on the bed across from him, with their daughter between them.

After pulling the blankets up to their waists, Keith studies her eyes as Allura watches him. Finally, he reaches out with a hand to caress her cheek. He listens to her sigh as his fingers move along her jaw then gently caresses her lips. She continues to hold his gaze as she reaches up to cover his hand with her own and he intertwines their fingers.

Breaking their gaze, his eyes move along her face, down her arm and finally to their joined hands. Gently pulling the hands close to him, Keith kisses the back of her hand. Pulling his hand away, he leans across Adrienne, rests his hand on Allura's waist and lightly kisses her on the lips.

A disappointed sigh escapes her when he pulls away to lie back down, leaving his hand on her waist. He watches her for a few more minutes as exhaustion finally overtakes Allura and her eyes flutter shut with sleep. Glancing down at his sleeping daughter, Keith leans over, kisses her forehead then checks his wife once more before he closes his eyes and joins her in sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 14

Awakening the next morning, Lance grimaces after looking at the clock and realizing how early it is. Knowing he wouldn't be able to get back to sleep, he slowly crawls out from under the covers, attempting not to awaken his wife. He pauses when she sighs in her sleep then grabs some clothes and heads for the bathroom.

After showering, shaving and finally dressing, twenty minutes later, he quietly walks back into the bedroom and pauses near the bed to watch his beautiful wife sleeping. Lance studies her, her ebony hair lying across the pillow, the rosy hue of her cheeks and lips and the way her long dark lashes lay across her cheeks as she sleeps. Remembering Keith's narrow escape yesterday, he bends over and kisses her forehead. Her eyes flutter open and she smiles sleepily at him, "Lance…"

Sitting down on the bed beside her, he kisses her lips then lightly caresses her cheek as he whispers, "I'm sorry I woke you. Go back to sleep." Christine sighs then closes her eyes as Lance stands and leaves the room.

Lance wanders down the hall toward the dining room, hoping that coffee is at least available at this early hour. He stops in the doorway of the room, more than a little shocked to see Keith sitting there drinking coffee while holding Adrienne. Raising an eyebrow at his friend, he wanders into the room and sits beside him, "I didn't think anyone else would be up this early besides me. I should have known you would be up and running." His eyes move down to the baby, "But not necessarily babysitting…"

Smiling in answer, Keith looks back down at Adrienne, who starts moving around while cooing. Feeling a smile crossing his face, Lance reaches for her, "Let me see that angel," and pulls the princess out of her father's arms, kissing her on the cheek. Keith takes the opportunity to refill his coffee cup before getting up and putting some food on a plate from the buffet.

Continuing to hold the baby while patting her back, Lance turns his gaze to Keith as the other man sits back down with his plate, "So, did you keep Adrienne overnight?"

Arching a brow at him, Keith takes a bite of food before answering, "Kind of…I stayed with Allura and Adrienne last night."

Trying to keep his mouth from dropping open, Lance stares Keith as he continues to eat, his tone slightly incredulous, "You slept with Allura? In the same bed?"

Keith turns and glares at Lance, who shakes his head as he continues, "Keith, it's just that I know you didn't stay with her the night before. You told me you couldn't handle being that close to her yet, even though you were going to work on the marriage. I'm just surprised by this. So, have you forgiven her?"

Turning his gaze back to his food, Keith feels his irritation with his friend slowly slide away. He sighs before he looks back at Lance, "I never want to be as afraid as I was yesterday, Lance. The thoughts that went through my head when I thought I had lost both of them…" he stops, drops his fork onto the table then takes Adrienne back from Lance and holds her close to him again.

Lance studies his friend closely as he cuddles his daughter. His tone is low as he asks, "Do you love Allura?"

Refusing to answer at first, Keith continues to hold Adrienne close. When he finally looks back up at Lance, his gaze is resolute, "Yes. I think part of me always has." He sighs then looks back down at his daughter, "It took almost losing her for me to even realize how much Allura means to me." He gives a muted laugh, "Sven asked me about it months ago when he noticed the way I acted around her. I denied it to him…and myself…refused to acknowledge it."

Reaching over, Lance caresses the baby's cheek as he hesitantly asks, "What about Beth? Did you love her?"

Taking a deep breath and releasing it slowly, Keith closes his eyes briefly before returning his gaze to his friend, "It was different Lance…I thought I loved Beth. But now…" he stops and shakes his head again unable to finish. Lance stays silent, watching his best friend struggle with his emotions. When Keith finally looks back up, his eyes are full of confusion, "I don't know what the hell to think or feel anymore…"

Lance finally smiles at him, "Well, I'm glad you are able to figure out your soap opera of a love life."

Snorting with derision, Keith rolls his eyes as he retorts, "Leave it to you to come up with some uplifting thought."

Continuing to laugh at him, the lieutenant pats Keith's shoulder before getting up to get himself some breakfast, "That is what I am here for good buddy."

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Sighing sleepily, Allura stretches as she slowly awakens. She turns over in bed and slowly opens her eyes, noticing she is alone. Frowning to herself as she reaches over, she runs her hand over the indentation in the pillow where Keith's head lay last night. Grabbing the pillow, she holds it close to her as she inhales his scent, the musky, outdoorsy smell that she always has associated with Keith.

Her mind runs over the memories of the night before and the look in his eyes as he kissed her. A hopeful feeling begins in her heart and races through her. Releasing the pillow, Allura slowly rises and looks about the room then glances back at the clock on the side table. Grimacing at the lateness of the hour and the pressure in her breasts, she throws back the covers and gets out of bed, pausing as a wave of dizziness assails her. Stumbling forward, Allura grabs the poster of her bed with one hand and slowly sinks to the floor while holding her head with the other.

She can hear the door to her room opening then hears Keith saying her name frantically. Closing her eyes, Allura feels him picking her up and placing her back on the bed while demanding, "Allura! Answer me!"

Blindly reaching up with a hand, she feels him grabbing it between his and rubbing it, but keeps her eyes closed as she whimpers, "Dizzy…"

Keith studies his wife's pale face as his eyes drift once again to the bandage on her forehead. He reaches for it, "Let me check your wound, sweetheart." Slowly, he pulls up the bandage, cringing when he hears her whimper as the tape pulls on the wounded skin.

Throwing the bandage into the garbage can beside the bed, he looks back down at her and studies the gash. The bruising that started the night before had only darkened. Grimacing at the sight of it, Keith acknowledges that while not deep enough to need stitches it certainly is bad enough. He lightly touches it with his fingers and listens to Allura sighing as the coolness from his skin relieves some of the pain, however briefly. She slowly opens her eyes once more as Keith's hand moves from her forehead to her cheek, "Are you all right?"

Giving a brief nod then frowning at the dizziness it causes, she tries to sit up again only to have Keith push her back down, "Rest Allura…I don't want you to collapse again." Staring up at him, she blushes and looks away before whispering, "I need to use the bathroom…"

The look of concern leaves Keith's eyes as he tries not to laugh. Clearing his throat, he answers, "Yes…I can see that would be something you need to take care of." He pulls on her hand then places his other hand on her arm to help her up, "Slowly Allura…" as she sits up again. Keith stands in front of her as she rises from the bed then grips his arms as another wave of dizziness assails her.

Glancing over at the bathroom door while thinking she would never make it over there, Keith finally says, "Close your eyes Allura, I'll carry you in there." He picks her up, holding her close to him as he carries her into the bathroom then slowly sets her back down on her feet. She re-opens her eyes and looks around as Keith studies her face. When she looks back at him, he asks, "All right?"

Allura releases her grip on him then steps back while answering, "Yes." Keith smiles at her then turns toward the door, "I'll be right outside, yell at me if you need help." Not answering, she watches Keith exit the room.

Pacing outside of Allura's bathroom door, Keith feels his impatience growing as he waits for her to come back out. He stops a few minutes later as the door finally re-opens and his wife slowly walks back out, her face still damp from its washing. She meets his gaze, "Adrienne?"

Moving in front of his wife, Keith studies her sapphire eyes as he once again reaches for her cheek, unable to resist wiping away the left over moisture, "She's asleep Allura. I fed her a bottle while you slept."

He notices the grimace that crosses her expression then she pulls away from him and turns back toward the bathroom. Keith grabs her arm to stop her, "Where are you going?"

Pausing as she turns back to him, she refuses to meet his eyes, her cheeks turning red as she answers, "I need my breast pump."

Keith tries not to laugh but can't help smiling at her as he says, "I'll get it, let's get you lying back down." Holding her arm, he slowly walks with her back to the bed then walks back to the bathroom to get the pump. Walking out with it a moment later, he sits down on the bed beside her then holds it out to her.

Taking the pump, she thanks him then sits there staring at it, her cheeks still flush with embarrassment. Finally taking the hint, Keith leans down and kisses her cheek, "I've got some things I need to take care of, but I'll be back later to check on you…rest. Please don't try to get out of bed again without help, ring for one of the maids." He smiles at her once more before he gets up and leaves the room.

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Awakening later that afternoon, Allura listens to the sounds of her governess bustling around the room. She opens her eyes then slowly sits up as Nanny stops her activities and smiles at her, "Ahh…finally awake I see. How do you feel?"

Allura smiles at her old caregiver, "I'm fine Nanny. The wound on my head is simply sore." Nanny opens her mouth to comment but stops when there is a knock at the door. She walks across the room and opens the door to allow Coran in.

Smiling in greeting, the advisor walks toward the bed, "Majesty, it is good to see you awake. I trust your injury isn't overly bothersome?"

Dropping her gaze away from Coran, the queen slowly shakes her head. Concerned, he looks away from her toward Nanny, who shrugs absently and shakes her head in response. Coran clears his throat facing, her once more, "If you feel up to it, Majesty, I have some items we need to discuss and a few decisions you need to make."

When Allura finally looks up at Coran, tears run down her cheeks as she whispers, "I'm sorry I'm such a disappointment to you."

Gazing down at her in shock, the older man starts, "Allura…" Rushing over to the bed, Nanny pulls the queen into her arms as Allura begins crying in earnest, "Darling girl…how could you think you could ever disappoint us?"

Sitting down on the bed beside her, Coran says her name quietly. When Allura finally pulls back from the governess to look at him, he replies, "Allura, I won't deny that I was upset with you when you became pregnant out of wedlock or the way you became pregnant." He looks away briefly, weariness entering his tone, "The more I have thought about it though, the more I feel I'm actually to blame for it."

Allura's eyes go wide with shock as he raises his gaze to meet hers again, "I pushed you so hard to marry for political gain, even though I knew how you felt about the commander. I had hoped it was just some silly, girlish crush that would go away…I should have known better," a soft smile slips across his face, "You are not the type to foolishly give away your heart. In that regard, you are much like your mother." The smile disappears then he lowers his head as he explains, "I informed the commander and his men, when they first arrived, that you were off-limits, meant for something more." Coran looks back up at her sadly, "Keith, being the honorable man he is, stayed away from you as requested. He didn't allow himself to even view you as anything other than the Princess of Arus. You were someone that was his duty to protect and serve, but no more."

Reaching over, the advisor takes her hand, "I figured it might disturb you to see the commander with Beth, but had no idea what hell I put you through by denying what was right in front of me. I'm so sorry, Allura that you felt heartbroken and desperate enough that you thought you had to do what you did."

Tears continue to fall down her cheeks as Allura leans over and Coran pulls her tight to him, hugging her. He strokes her hair, "You are the daughter I never had, Allura. I would never think of you as a disappointment and I am sorry that you ever thought you could be."

Looking across the bed as he holds the queen, Coran finds a sad smile on the governess' face. Tightening his grip on Allura, he returns the smile then buries his face in her hair. Nanny sniffles quietly as she wipes at the tears running down her cheeks before reaching over and grasping Allura's hand, squeezing it tightly as the queen looks back at her with a smile.

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Once Coran and Nanny leave the room, Allura slowly rises and makes her way to the nursery. She smiles at Adrienne as she moves about in her crib. Running her hand along the baby's cheek, she finally picks her up when she begins to fuss. She slowly walks over to the rocking chair then feeds her daughter while humming a lullaby. Once the baby is done eating, she continues to hum to her while patting her back. After her daughter falls asleep, Allura slowly rises and places her back in her crib.

Feeling lonely, she reenters her bedroom then puts on her bathrobe before leaving the room. Slowly making her way down the hall, Allura stops in front of Keith's office door then knocks softly. Once she hears his voice calling out, "Enter," she opens the door and walks into the room.

Keith's head is down as he continues to write on a piece of paper. He does not look up as he says, "Be with you in a moment." Watching him, she slowly walks up to the desk then starts to move around it as Keith finally sits back and notices her, "Allura…" As he rises from his chair, Allura walks up to him and places her head on his chest as his arms wrap around her. She feels his lips kiss the top of her head before hearing him ask, "Are you all right?"

Moving her arms around his waist, Allura nods against his chest but does not speak. He takes a deep breath and releases it as he rubs her back, "What's wrong? Does your head hurt?"

Sighing, Allura glances up at him, whispers, "Lonely," then pushes her face back into his chest.

Making an understanding noise in the back of his throat, Keith pulls away long enough to sit back down in his chair then reaches for her arm and pulls her into his lap. Allura snuggles her face into his neck as he wraps his arms around her while asking, "Lonely huh…"

Digging her fingers into his shirt, she answers, "Every time I wake up alone, I'm scared that I'll find it was a dream and that you still hate me…"

She can feel his body stiffening underneath her as his tone turns hard, "I never hated you Allura…"

Taking a shuddering breath, she interrupts him, "Felt like it. Once Romelle left, no one would talk to me, except Coran and Nanny. I was in a castle full of people and I felt completely alone."

Keith fights a battle within himself as his anger once again begins to resurface. Trying to push it away, he curtly replies, "Allura I had a right to be angry with you." He feels her tears falling against the skin of his neck as she sighs, "I know…" She lifts her head and looks into his eyes as the tears continue to fall, "I'm sorry…so sorry…that I hurt you."

Taking a deep breath and releasing it, he feels his anger dissolve slowly. He pulls Allura back against him and tightens his arms around her as she buries her face into his neck once more. Unable to stop himself from picking at the subject, he asks, "Allura, all those times I asked you who the father was…why didn't you tell me? Finding out by having Coran shoving Adrienne into my arms…" he pauses a moment, "That wasn't the way I would have chosen to find out I was a father."

Shuddering against him, Allura digs her fingers into his shirt as she replies, "I didn't know for sure that I was pregnant until I fainted at Christmas and Dr. Gorma told me." Her voice begins to break, "I knew Coran…would insist…you marry me and you had just proposed to Beth." She takes several deep breaths to calm down, "I didn't want to ruin your happiness because of my mistake. Not telling you or anyone else the name the father was the only thing I could think of to stop that."

Stiffening unconsciously again as he once again struggles with the anger boiling up inside of him again, Keith hesitantly asks, "I still wouldn't know, would I Allura…if Adrienne didn't look like me?"

She does not answer him, instead tightening her hold on him while burying her face into his neck. Keith takes a deep breath and lets it go in an effort to calm himself. Feeling her tense body against him, he rubs her back lightly then deliberately lightens his tone as he says, "You didn't answer me earlier…how's your head?"

Relieved by the change of subject, Allura continues to grip him tightly as she answers, "Sore."

Sighing, he continues to rub her back when another thought hits him, "Did you eat today?" He feels her nod her head against him, but her grip loosens on his shirt as she replies, "Nanny brought me lunch."

He looks over at the clock then turns toward her to kiss her forehead, "Dinner is in an hour. You better go get a bath and change. I don't want to hear what Nanny would say if you went to dinner in your bathrobe."

Reluctantly releasing her husband, Allura slowly rises from his lap and looks sadly at him once more before leaving the room. When the door closes behind her, Keith sits back in his chair and takes several deep breaths while pushing his fingers into his eyes, trying to calm the rage the conversation stirred within him.

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Forty-five minutes later, Keith walks down the hall toward his wife's room feeling quite calm. Between the worry the day before about losing her to realizing that he loved her to their conversation that afternoon that had enraged him, his emotions felt like they had survived a rollercoaster ride from hell. He had left his office early to find the bottle of whiskey that Lance usually kept hidden in the rec room.

Two shots later and a walk around the castle gardens gave him the time he need to analyze their conversation. It aggravated him to realize that had she admitted to the child being his earlier, the outcome would have likely been the same. He would still have been enraged at first, refusing to see her, talk to her and that could have jeopardized Adrienne's birth. It was a hard truth to swallow…no matter when Allura would have told him…he would not have taken it well and at least this way, he had his daughter.

"I have to let this go…it can't be changed or undone," was what he concluded after several trips around the garden path. Having made up his mind, the calm came over him and all the pain and hurt seemed to disappear. He was surprised when he glanced at his watch and realized it was soon time for dinner and he needed to go pick up his wife.

Knocking on the door, Keith walks in when requested then pauses as Allura stands up from her vanity and turns to face him. A bandage once again covered the wound on her head, but her face already had more color to it than when he had first seen her two days before. The look in her eyes is hesitant as she smiles at him then gestures down to the dress, "Nanny found me a new one."

Looking down at the dress, Keith had to agree is complimented her much more than the old pink dresses did. Much simpler in style, the light blue cotton hugs her upper body, emphasizing her full breasts before flowing to the floor, but it didn't make her look as haggard as the other one she wore to dinner the night before. The sides of her hair are held back with clips, before the mass flows down her back, giving her a more adult look. Looking back into her face, he can see her chewing on her bottom lip as she tries to stand still in front of him.

Moving in front of her, Keith smiles as he compliments, "You look nice," leaning down, he kisses the exposed side of her forehead then adds, "…despite the bandage on your head." As she blushes and looks away from him, he reaches up to caress her cheek while saying, "We are ok, Allura…"

Her eyes finally rise to meet his, the uncertainty still there as she asks, "You forgive me?"

Taking a deep breath, Keith nods to her, "Yes," then pulls her into his arms, holding her close to his body. His lips move over the top of her head as he continues, "While I wish you would have said something to me before all this had happened, I'm not going to hold it against you for the rest of our lives." Pulling back, he smiles at her, "For better or worse, it's you and me."

As she finally smiles, one that reaches her eyes, he says, "Let's get to dinner." At her nod, he takes her arm and escorts her from the room.

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As everyone finishes their dessert, Allura fights to keep her eyes open. Exhausted, she feels her eyelids drooping then shakes her head a little in the effort to wake up. Her attention moves across the table as Lance asks, "Anybody feel like a movie tonight? Coran said they finished repairing the rec room this afternoon."

"I think we will pass."

Allura turns her head toward her husband, who smiles at her as he finishes, "Allura's about to fall sleep in her chair. I think I should get her to bed."

She does not get a chance to reply as he rises from his chair beside hers then helps her up. Allura barely hears the calls of good night from the others as she takes Keith's arm and he leads them from the dining room.

Neither speaks as Keith escorts her to her room. She glances at him as they walk into the room and he nods toward the bathroom, "Go, and get ready for bed." Nodding to him, she moves over to her dresser to find a nightgown then goes into the bathroom as instructed. When she comes out a few minutes later, disappointment fills her to find the room empty. Feeling tears starting to fill her eyes, she jumps as the door to the nursery opens and Keith steps back into the room.

Noticing the look on her face, he quickly walks over to her, "What's wrong?"

Moving into his arms, Allura lays her head against his chest, "You were gone."

"I only went to check on Adrienne," he explains as Keith runs a hand down her hair. Pulling back, he touches her cheek while saying, "Let's get you into bed," then guides her across the room. Once she lies down, he pulls the covers up over her, tucking her in. As he turns to leave, Allura grabs his hand and pleads, "Stay with me…"

Sitting down on the bed, Keith studies her sapphire eyes, squeezes her hand then replies, "No Allura. I'm not ready to share a room and a bed with you yet."

Tears fill Allura's eyes as she retorts, "But, you said you forgave me…"

"I have…" Keith starts to answer then sighs. Lifting up the hand still holding his so tightly that he can feel it starting to tingle, he kisses it then finishes, "I have forgiven you Allura, but I need some time…so much has happened in the last couple of days. Just give me some time to process it all and adjust."

Her hand reluctantly loosens on his as she nods. Keith leans down and kisses her forehead, "Sleep well. I'll check on you in the morning before practice."

As he attempts to rise once more, Allura grabs his hand again, "Stay until I fall asleep." Feeling exasperation filling him, he looks back into her eyes to find tears welling in them as she continues to plead, "Please Keith, I don't want to be alone."

Keith finally nods and sits back down as he instructs, "Turn onto your side, Allura." Turning away from him as asked, she feels him move in behind her then his arm wraps around her waist as he spoons her. Sighing and feeling safe, Allura closes her eyes and falls asleep while inhaling his scent.

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Awakening the next morning, sadness fills her as she finds herself alone in the bed. She turns over, pushes her hair out of her face, and finds a note on the pillow beside her. Picking up the note, Allura opens it and happiness fills her as she recognizes Keith's handwriting. _Hope you slept well…take it easy today. See you at lunch._

A knock at the door has her turning her attention away from the note, "Yes?"

It opens to reveal Christine, carrying in a breakfast tray. She smiles as she says, "I thought you might be hungry since you missed breakfast."

Reservation fills her as Allura remembers the conversations she once heard between Christine and Beth. Keeping her tone neutral, she replies, "I could have gone to the kitchen…"

The smile falls off Christine's face as she sets the tray down on the mattress beside the queen. Sitting down next to it, her fingers lightly trace over the dome covering the plate. She finally looks back at Allura and whispers, "I know you have no reason to trust me…" their eyes meet, "but I would like to be your friend."

Allura gives her a disbelieving look as she starts to throw back the covers to rise from the bed. Desperate, Christine reaches out to grab her hand to stop her. "Please, I know I was wrong about you…about many things. Beth…was wrong as well. I never stopped to think through the things she said, but I realize now that she was jealous of you…as was I."

Releasing the queen's hand, Christine gestures wildly as she continues, "All we saw was that you were this beautiful princess, who lived in a castle and you had these handsome men, who surrounded you and protected you. You piloted a lion…you were everything we weren't and I couldn't believe that Lance could possibly want me instead of you."

"We've only ever been friends…" whispers Allura as she stares at the woman next to her.

"I know that now," answers Christine. She smiles sadly, "It took me a long time to realize that you are only human like the rest of us. You have feelings, dreams…things you wanted and saw taken away from you."

Tears fill Allura's eyes as she looks away from her. She feels Christine take her hand again and looks back to find her eyes hopeful, "I understand what happened between you and Keith. It's not my place to judge you, but if I were in your shoes and saw Lance walking away from me…I can't truthfully say that I wouldn't have done something similar."

The hand holding hers tightens and Allura listens to Christine sincerely repeat, "I would like us to be friends."

Nodding, Allura sucks back a sobbing breath as she answers, "I would like that too…"

Smiling brilliantly, Christine releases the queen's hand then takes the top off the platter to reveal enough food for at least two people, "I don't know about you…but I'm starving."

A quiet laugh escapes the queen at the sight of all the food. She nods to her new friend then reaches for a piece of fruit as they begin to eat and talk.


	15. Chapter 15

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 15

Over the next month, Keith and Allura fall into a pattern as Allura continues to work through her depression. Occasionally the stress would get to her and someone would find her crying in a hallway or a room, always calling the king to come to her. At night, Keith would lay beside her until she fell asleep. Every morning, Allura would awaken to a note on the pillow beside her, proof that Keith had checked on her while she slept that morning. Sometimes the notes would be sweet, other times funny, making Allura laugh as she read _Lance is going to hate me today… _and the next morning, _if Lance thought yesterday was bad, wait till he sees what I am going to do to him today…_

This morning, Allura awakens to _Happy Birthday Angel…look at your table._ Sitting up, she looks over at the table by the window and smiles to see a vase full of her favorite flowers. Rising, she walks to the table then bends over them, inhaling their sweet fragrance.

She hears a knock at her door and walks back to her bed to pull on her bathrobe before saying, "Enter." Christine walks into the room and smiles at her, "Good morning, Allura and happy birthday!"

Allura walks over to her friend and hugs her, "Thanks."

Over the last month, she has come to depend on Christine as a good friend. It had been an uneasy friendship at first given Allura's depression, but soon the women found they had more in common than once thought. Allura finally started confiding things to Christine that she never thought she could share with anyone else, not even Keith. It had become a delight to spend time with Lance's wife and having a female friend, something she's never had before. Christine looks over at the table and notices the vase full of flowers, "Are the flowers from Keith?"

Smiling, the queen walks back to admire them, "Yes, I was surprised he remembered how much I like these."

Returning the smile, Christine steps forward to smell the flowers, "They are beautiful." She turns her gaze back to Allura, "I actually wanted to ask if you wanted to join me today? I have a couple of friends from the village I lived in coming to visit."

A look of worry crosses Allura's face briefly as she becomes visibly nervous, "I don't know, Christine…"

Taking her hand and squeezing it, Christine tries to reassure her, "It will be fine. You will like these ladies and it's just for morning tea."

The queen finally nods and Christine hugs her, "I promise Allura, you will have a good time." She smiles at her friend again, "Bring Adrienne if she is awake." At the nod she receives, Christine leaves the room.

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That afternoon, Allura stands along a balcony, staring at the countryside as the wind blows through her hair. Sighing as she studies the sky, she briefly stiffens as arms come around her waist then she breathes out, "Keith…" as his arms tightens around her and he kisses her neck.

Keith moves his lips from her neck to ear so he can whisper, "Happy birthday, Angel," then nuzzles her neck again as Allura moves her head to the side to give him more access. He stops a moment later, his lips brushing a kiss against her ear as he says, "I missed you at lunch. Did you enjoy your visit with Christine's friends?"

Resting her head against his shoulder, Allura wraps her arms around his then intertwines their fingers, "Yes, I liked them a lot. It was lunch time before we knew it and we decided to have something brought in to us."

Kissing the side of her head, Keith squeezes her fingers as he replies, "I'm glad you enjoyed yourself." His next whispered words drive a tremor through her, "Do you want your other birthday gift?"

Twisting her head so she can look into his eyes, Allura asks, "A gift?"

A sexy smile slips across his face before he tilts his head down and kisses her on the lips. Time seems to stand still for Allura as Keith moves his lips against hers. She whimpers slightly as she raises an arm up behind his head to hold him in place. Keith tightens his hold on her than groans against her mouth when his comm. unit goes off. He pulls his lips from Allura's and takes the unit off his belt, "Kogane."

Turning in his arms to hug him, Allura rests her head against his chest. Coran's voice comes across the unit, "Majesty, the elder from the village of Desmond wishes to have a few minutes of your time to discuss some security concerns he has in case of attack."

Keith sighs as he moves an arm to Allura's back and rubs it, "I'll be there in a moment, Coran. Kogane out." He kisses her forehead, "I have to go. I'll see you at dinner."

Looking earnestly back up into his eyes, she whispers, "One more gift?"

His eyes dance with laughter as he leans down and briefly kisses her once more on the lips. He moves his hand from her back to caress her cheek, "Enjoy your afternoon," then turns and leaves the balcony. Allura sighs as she watches him go then turns back to the view in front of her. She reaches up to touch her lips with her fingers while she relives the kisses, the first she has received to the lips since the night of Lotor's last attack.

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A week later, Allura is finishing dressing when there is a knock at her door, "Enter." She quickly runs her brush through her hair once more than turns toward the door smiling as Christine walks through and smiles at her, "Good morning."

Allura's smile dims in disappointment for a moment then comes back as she walks across the room, "Good morning Christine, did you need something?"

Continuing to smile, Christine's eyebrow lifts mockingly as she asks, "Hoping I was Keith by any chance?"

The expression on Allura's face turns chagrined as Christine starts laughing. Allura rolls her eyes at her, "You are too much like Lance…I think his bad habits are rubbing off on you."

She laughs all the harder, "He would see that as a compliment you know." The queen crosses her arms in front of herself as she glares at her friend. Christine tries to rein in her laughter as she steps forward and hugs Allura, "I'm sorry, but I had to pick on you."

Releasing a long-suffering sigh at her antics, Allura nods to her as Christine takes in her appearance. Since Allura's birthday last week, she has taken more pains with dressing and styling her hair in hopes of inspiring more kisses from Keith. So far, she has been a bit disappointed. Resisting the urge to smiles, Christine inquires, "So no more kisses yet I take it?"

Sighing as she turns around, walks to her bed and sits on it, Allura's expression turns glum as she pouts, "No. I'm beginning to think he is just enjoying teasing me now. He will lean in like he is going to kiss me then kisses my cheek or forehead instead."

Christine smiles because she knows that is exactly what Keith has been doing. Lance was always horrible at keeping secrets, and Keith confided in Lance about teasing Allura yesterday. Which of course, Lance promptly told her about as they lay in bed last night. Christine sits next to Allura on the bed and takes her hand, "Maybe you should kiss him instead of waiting for him to kiss you."

Her expression turns thoughtful as Allura turns her gaze to Christine then a shadow of doubt crosses her face as she looks away, "What if he doesn't want me to kiss him? I don't want him to become angry with me again."

Leaning over, Christine hugs her again, "Trust me in this, Allura. I know he wouldn't get angry if you kissed him." She grabs Allura's chin and forces her to look at her, "Maybe he is waiting for you to do something and that is why he keeps teasing you."

Allura's brow furrows as she takes in Christine's thoughts then she nods at her. Christine smiles again, "Ok, back to the original reason for my visit. My friends are coming this morning for tea and I was wondering if you wanted to join us again?"

Looking disappointed, Allura answers, "I'm stuck in meetings this morning." She brightens as a thought comes to her, "I suppose I could see if Coran would be able to rearrange a couple of them."

Hugging her for the final time, Christine says, "If you can join us, great, 10 o'clock in the rec room." She stands then leaves the room.

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Entering the rec room at 10 o'clock, Christine begins greeting her friends before she notices another visitor she wasn't expecting. Inwardly cringing and hoping Allura couldn't get away from her work, she greets her, "Beth! I didn't know you were joining us." Christine walks up to her, hugging her, "How are you?"

Pushing her away, Beth looks at her bitterly, "How do you think I am, Christine?"

Stepping back from her, Christine looks at her other two friends, who won't meet her gaze, before looking back at Beth again, "I'm sorry Beth."

The other woman laughs snidely, "You're sorry…" Her expression fills with hatred as she shouts, "Everyone is sorry but that bitch! She got exactly what she always wanted."

Christine reddens as she holds up a hand, "Beth, don't start…"

Crossing her arms, Beth snarls, "Oh I'm sorry Christine, am I insulting your new best friend?"

Looking over at the other two friends, who redden and won't look at her at all, she hears Beth continue, "I heard all about you and that bitch!" She looks back at her, but before Christine can comment Beth screams at her, "How could you befriend that whore? She took everything away from me!"

Throwing up her hands in front of her in defense, Christine starts, "Beth…" then stops when she hears a sound coming from behind her. Turning around, she finds Allura standing in the doorway. Beth looks over and notices her as well. Her lips twist with rage as she starts across the room, "You bitch…"

Christine moves to get between the two only for Allura to turn around and run down the hall.

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Racing down the hallway, Lance listens to the others reporting in that they haven't found the queen as he starts down the steps leading into the gardens. Reaching the bottom, he can hear her wails coming from one of the paths. Hurrying, the lieutenant finds her standing near a wall, crying hysterically as she pulls at her hair.

"Allura…"

Reaching for her, Lance quickly pulls back the next minute as Allura screams then tries to kick and punch at him. Pulling away from her entirely, he rips the comm. unit off his belt.

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Sitting at his desk while meeting with Coran and one of the local village elders, Keith jumps as his communicator goes off. Pulling it off his belt, he replies, "Kogane."

"Keith, Code Meltdown Alpha."

Swearing loudly despite the shocked look of the elder, he demands, "Where?"

"Garden."

"I'm on my way," Keith looks at a confused Coran then apologizes to the elder, "Excuse me, emergency. Coran take over," then quickly gets up and leaves the room, running down the hallway.

He enters the garden to see Lance standing over Allura, who is hysterical. His friend looks up relieved to see him, "She won't let me touch her. She screams and hits at me every time I try."

Grimacing, Keith lowers himself to the ground and sits on his knees in front of her, "Allura?"

Her red, puffy eyes briefly meet his then she curls into a ball on the ground. Keith grabs her shoulder and starts to pull her up as she cries, "NO!" Ignoring her, he fully pulls her up into his arms, hugging her to him as he pleads, "Allura, let me help you…"

She finally wraps her arms around his waist but continues to weep, her body still stiff. Keith shifts so he sits on the ground against the garden wall then pulls Allura into his lap, her head resting on his shoulder, her face hidden in his neck as her fingers dig into his chest.

Moving across from them, Lance sits on the bench on the edge of the path as he watches Keith calm his wife down. They sit for a long while, Lance getting up occasionally to keep other people out of the garden as Allura slowly quiets down then finally falls asleep in Keith's arms.

Once she is asleep, Keith quietly speaks to Lance, "Do you know what brought this on?"

Flushing even as he grimaces, he asks, "She's asleep right?"

Keith shifts her a bit and she sighs in her sleep as she curls more into him, "Yes, so what the hell happened?"

Rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, Lance explains, "Christine's friends came to visit and she invited Allura to join them like she did the last time. What Christine didn't know was that Beth decided to come along."

Gritting his teeth in anger, he listens to Lance continue, "It wasn't an all-out confrontation, but Allura stood just inside the door listening as Beth said some nasty things. Christine didn't know she was there until she heard Allura crying. Allura ran away and Christine contacted me. The guys and I searched the castle until I found her out here."

Shaking his head in disbelief, Keith tightens his hold on his wife. He is about to try to stand up with her when Christine enters the garden and walks up to them, "Is she all right?"

Nodding, Keith watches Lance stand up then takes his wife's hand. Clearly upset, Christine looks from Lance back to the king, "I'm so sorry Keith. I didn't know Beth was coming today. I hadn't invited her."

Sighing deeply, Keith shakes his head at her, "Don't worry about it Christine, she will be fine."

Squeezing Lance's hand tightly, Christine whispers, "She won't leave…"

Looking at her confused, Keith inquires, "Who won't leave?"

Glancing at Lance again, who wraps his arm around her waist, Christine takes a deep breath and releases it before answering, "Beth. She insists on speaking to you and won't leave until she does."

Keith stares at her for a moment, saying nothing, then shifts Allura as he rises. He walks toward them and pauses, "I'm taking Allura up to her room. I'll be down to speak to Beth after I have her settled." He looks at Lance, "Conference room D on the first floor."

At his friend's nod, Keith tightens his grip on his wife as he walks out of the garden.

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Bracing himself for the battle ahead, Keith walks toward the conference room. He hasn't seen or spoken to his ex-fiancée since the night his daughter was born and Beth walked out of his life. Entering the room to find her standing on the other side, he stops, looking her over as she turns around to face him. Beth appraises him as well before snidely commenting, "Marriage seems to agree with you, your Majesty."

Inwardly grimaces at her tone, Keith keeps his own face and tone neutral, "Hello Beth, you wanted to speak to me?"

Beth walks around the table to stand in front of him. He can see the fury in her eyes as she demands, "Do you remember what today is, Keith?"

Watching her closely without revealing a hint of emotion, he answers, "Yes, I do."

Her fury erupts, "That's all you can say about it!"

Looking away from her, Keith runs his hand through his hair in agitation before facing her again. His own irritation finally shines through as he demands, "What do you want me to say about it, Beth?

Beth tries to slap him but he grabs her hand to stop her. She rips her hand away from him as tears go down her cheeks, "We were supposed to be married today! Don't tell me you don't feel anything about it!"

Sucking in a deep, angry breath and releasing it, he replies, "Beth, I'm married and my life is what it is. I didn't choose it, but I have to live it and make it work for me. What did you hope to accomplish by coming here today?"

"You should have never married her!" she yells then Beth throws her arms around him, "Leave her and come with me, Keith!"

Reaching behind him, he pulls her arms away from him then steps back, creating space between them, "You know I can't do that."

"You don't love her, Keith! I know you don't! That bitch trapped you and took you away from me! Come with me!" she rages as tears continue down her face.

Keith stares incredulously at the woman he thought he knew, "What of my daughter, Beth? Am I supposed to just leave her too?"

Reaching for him again, her fingers dig into the front of his shirt as she answers, "Yes! You told me you loved me more than life itself! Please Keith, come away with me!"

Yanking her hands away from him, Keith shakes his head at her as he retorts, "You once told me the thing you loved most about me was my honor. Now, you expect me to break every vow I've ever made and walk away from my wife and daughter?"

Staring at him blindly in defeat, Beth sinks into a conference chair as Keith continues, "Even if I could forget the fact that I am married to Allura, which I couldn't, I would never leave my daughter. I must ask you not to come back here again Beth…it's too hard on everyone."

He turns around to leave but stops at the door, looking back at her regretfully, "I'm sorry," then turns around and walks out of the room. He pauses near Michael to instruct, "Escort her out of the castle and inform the guards they are not to allow her entrance again." At the other man's nod, Keith continues his way down the hallway.

Slamming his hand on the button to open the conference room door, Michael steps inside the door then leans his shoulder against the doorframe while crossing his arms. When she finally looks up at him, he drawls, "Are you happy now, darlin?"

Sniffling loudly, Beth stands up and glares at him. Refusing to answer, she starts for the door only for his arm to shoot across in front of it, stopping her from leaving. Glaring up at him, she demands, "Let me pass."

"Not until you've answered my question." Placing his body into the doorway to fully block it, fury shines in his eyes as Michael asks, "So, are you happy? You've hurt Christine, the queen and Keith…all in one morning."

"The queen…" sneers Beth, ignoring the other accusations, then she yells, "That bitch hurt me," she slams her hand against her chest, "she took everything away from me! I did nothing to her!"

"Nothing…" drawls the private as he shakes his head, "From what I witnessed in my short time here, you were never nice to her. I heard you, more than once, make snide comments to Christine. Please, do not act like the poor, innocent to me."

"She stole Keith from me!" snarls Beth as she places her hand on her hips.

"Oh, that is her crime, is it? See, to my eyes, her crime was against Keith, not you, and he has forgiven her for it, so it's done." Taking a step toward her, Michael grabs her shoulders, "Keith is married to Allura and is king now. That can't be undone. You need to let it go and move on. "

Feeling her pulse starting to pound at the touch of his hands, Beth demands, "Unhand me!"

His furious blue eyes probe hers closely before suddenly dips down and his captures her lips in a kiss. As she starts to pull back, his arms move around her like steel bands, one hand moving up to her head to hold her in place as he deepens the kiss. He yelps a moment later, quickly releases her then places a hand up against his mouth as she steps back to snarl, "How dare you kiss me!"

Feeling the sting on his tongue where she bit it, Michael finally puts his hand back down as he growls, "You damned hell cat!"

"And you are a philandering bastard!" she insults back. Pushing past him, Beth makes it through the door then starts down a hallway. She cries out a moment later then glares at the man holding her arm tightly. Glaring up at him, Beth listens to Michael as he states, "You're going the wrong way. The exit is this way…" then he turns them around and starts leading her in the opposite direction.

Trying to rip her arm away from him, only to have him tighten his grip, Beth yells, "Release me you bastard!"

"A chuisle, one of these days, you will realize what you could have had…but by then it will be too late," answers Michael as he ignores her continued insults while leading her out of the castle.

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Trying to work the fury out of his system, Keith slowly walks back up to Allura's room. Pausing in front of the door, he takes several deep breaths and releases them before reaching for the button to open the door. Lance's voice stops him as he yells, "Keith!" while rushing down the hall.

He waits until Lance catches up with him then stares at him apprehensively as he asks, "What?"

Bending over while trying to catches his breath, Lance manages to stutter, "Beth… has left, but not…without screaming down the castle….on the way out the door."

Grimacing, Keith retorts, "Is that the only reason you stopped me?"

Shaking his head as he manages to stand upright once more, Lance adds, "I figured you could use a bit of advice."

Keith narrows his eyes, "What would I need your advice about?"

Taking a step closer to his friend, Lance makes a show of sniffing the air near him. Taking a step away, Keith looks at him as if he has lost his mind, "What the hell do you think you are doing?"

Arching a sardonic eyebrow at him, the lieutenant answers, "If I were you and I didn't want Allura to have another meltdown today, I would grab a shower and change clothes before going near her. I somehow don't think smelling Beth's perfume on your shirt is going to keep her calm."

Looking down at himself, Keith pulls up his shirt, smells it then swears. Lance grins broadly at him, "You're welcome…"

Glaring at his friend for his imprudence, Keith finally runs his hand through his hair in agitation before giving a grudging "Thanks…" then turns around and walks back down the hall.

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After showering and drying his hair, Keith pulls on a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt before going back to Allura's room. As he enters, he finds her awake, sitting on the side of the bed, staring blindly out the window. He approaches her, "Allura?"

Startled out of her thoughts, she looks over at him but says nothing. Keith walks to her, sits on the bed beside her then wraps his arm around her, pulling Allura against his side. Turning his head, he kisses her forehead while asking, "Feeling better?"

He listens to her sigh then she shrugs and lays her head against his shoulder. Keith tightens his hold on her waist. Taking a deep breath, he informs her, "Beth's gone Allura and she isn't going to come back again." He can feel her stiffen at the mention of Beth's name then she pulls away from him.

Turning toward her, Keith grabs her cheek as he looks intently into her eyes, "Allura, for better or for worse, you are my wife now. I need you to know that I will never leave you or Adrienne." He pulls her stiff body into a hug as he finishes, "You two are my family now…my very life and I will never leave you." Placing a kiss along the side of her neck, he lifts his hand and wraps it in her hair. Pulling her head toward him, he kisses her, his mouth moving along hers intently then slides up to place another one on her forehead before he looks into her eyes again.

Moving his hand from the back of her head, he cups her cheek again, "Do you understand me?"

As Allura studies his eyes, a tear slides down her cheek. Reaching up to cover his hand with hers, she nods. Keith smiles at her, leans forward, kisses the tear away then lightly kisses her again before standing up, "I need to get back to my office for a while and finish my meetings. Will you be all right?"

Taking a deep, shuddering breath, Allura nods. "I'll see you at dinner," Keith smiles at her again then leaves the room.


	16. Chapter 16

We are coming up to the end…many thanks to the reviewers. I realize many people have problems with this story and the way Allura behaves in it. Some have called her weak, but I don't see it that way. _In this story,_ I see a strong woman who has lost many things in her life, has risen above it but couldn't handle losing the one thing she wanted most…Keith. And that brought down the whole thing. But that's my opinion…at least in this story. ;)

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 16

Two hours later, Keith concludes his meetings. He escorts out his guests then sits back down in his chair and turns toward his window, looking out of it. '_What a day…if I live to be 100, I never want to have another day like this one.'_ He continues to look out the window and finally notices what a nice afternoon it is and an idea comes to him.

Contacting Nanny, he asks for a picnic basket to be brought out to the stables for him then leaves his office. He stops by Lance's room and speaks to him for a moment before continuing onto his wife's room. As he enters the room, Keith finds Allura in the rocking chair, feeding Adrienne. A bright smile crosses his face as he moves across the room toward them. Leaning down, he kisses her forehead then kisses the baby's forehead as well, "How's my ladies?"

Allura looks up at him, curious about his good mood, "Fine."

Reaching down, he gently caresses his daughter's cheek as she continues to suckle then looks back into his wife's eyes, "Almost done here?"

Confused, Allura nods, pulls the baby away from her to place her up on her shoulder, patting her back. Keith smiles at her, "Good, we are going to go for a horseback ride and a picnic."

Staring up at him in shock, Allura repeats, "A picnic?" as Keith leans down and takes the baby from her. Continuing to pat the baby's back, he looks back at her, "I'm going to hand off Adrienne to Nanny and then we leave."

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Galloping along, Keith leads Allura out to a beautiful spot several miles away from the castle, in a small glen that is full of flowers. Pulling the horse to a stop, he smiles back at his wife then dismounts. Taking a blanket off the back of the saddle, he lays it down on top of the grass before taking the picnic basket down and letting his horse go to wander in the glen. He walks over to Allura, who is still sitting on her horse. He helps her down, letting her body rub along his as he sets her down on her feet. A devilish smile crosses his face as he looks at her red cheeks then he leads her to the blanket.

Sitting beside her, he opens the basket and starts pulling out their dinner. Nanny had included sandwiches, fruit and some cheese along with a bottle of wine. Keith holds out a strawberry for Allura, pulling it away as she tries to take it with her fingers. She looks up at him curiously as he smiles at her, "Use your mouth…" then holds it out for her again.

Confused by his request, Allura stares at him for a moment as he dangles the strawberry in front of her. Finally leaning forward, she takes a bite off the strawberry. Pulling it away from her, Keith finishes off the strawberry. He leans forward, kisses her briefly then sits back and hands her a sandwich along with a glass of the wine.

After they finish their dinner, Keith puts everything back into the basket then lies back on the blanket. Holding out his hand to Allura, he smiles in invitation to her. She lies down beside him, resting her head on his shoulder as he wraps his arm around her waist.

As her hand moves over his chest in an effort to get comfortable, Keith points up to the sky. "What do you see?"

Glancing up as well, Allura asks, "What do you mean? I see clouds."

"No, look again…"

As she looks upward, Keith says, "What shapes can you see in the clouds? Any rabbits…butterflies?"

Smiling at the child's game, she points up to one fluffy cloud, "I think those look like Nanny's bloomers…"

Laughter erupts out of him as Keith stares up at the cloud in question. Turning his head, he kisses her nose then points up at a different cloud, "That could be a bird…"

Nodding, she continues to look at the clouds and pointing at the different shapes as they pass them by. She smiles to herself as Keith laughs at some of her answers. Yawning after a while, Allura closes her eyes as she curls against him more firmly.

Noticing the movement, Keith falls silent for a few moments, his hand moving along her back. Glancing upward again, he asks her about another cloud. When she does not answer, he looks down to find his wife asleep. He smiles to himself then closes his eyes as well, deciding to join her.

Keith wakes up some time later to the sound of his comm. unit. Refusing to open his eyes, he pulls it off his belt as Allura stirs beside him, "This had better be an emergency…"

There is a loud throat clearing sound then Lance says, "Well, not an emergency…but if you haven't been paying attention to the sky, you may want to get moving."

Sitting up as Allura fully awakens, Keith looks upward then starts swearing. Dark storm clouds had moved in while they had slept and it looked like it would rain any moment. Going back to his comm. unit, he replies, "Lance, it doesn't look like we will make it back before it rains. There is a cave about a mile away from where we are now, I'm taking us there. Kogane out."

Pulling his wife to her feet, he instructs, "Grab the blanket and the basket while I get the horses. We need to move fast or we will get soaked."

Keith runs across the glen and gathers his horse's reins just as thunder cracks and lightning streaks across the sky, scaring Allura's horse into running away. Swearing profusely as he climbs up into the saddle, he rides the horse back to Allura and pulls her up behind him, "Hang onto everything. We have to get to the cave quick."

As he canters the horse across the valley, the skies open up and rain pours down on them. Arriving at the cave a few minutes later, Keith grabs the basket from Allura, holding onto it as she jumps off the horse. She takes the basket and blanket from him then runs into the cave as he climbs off the horse and leads it into the cave. After he ties the reins to a boulder, Keith looks over to find his wife shivering, "You need to take that shirt off Allura, it's soaked. Wrap the blanket around yourself once you get it off."

Turning his back to her to give her some privacy, he turns his attention back to the horse and removes the saddle. Setting it on the cave floor, he removes his own wet shirt then pulls the blanket off the back of the horse and wraps it around his chest before turning back to Allura, who gasps audibly. Moving across the cavern with concern etches across his features, he demands, "What's wrong?"

Flushing a brilliant red color, she mumbles, "They hurt…"

Confused, Keith asks, "What hurts?"

Turning even redder as she tightens the blanket around her, Allura refuses to look him in the eyes as she answers, "My breasts…I would normally be feeding Adrienne by now."

Keith's face remains neutral but his eyes dance with laughter as he inquires, "Would you like some assistance?"

Finally looking into his eyes, she questions, "How? There is no breast pump in that basket and no way to get back to the castle…"

Unable to stand it anymore, Keith laughs at her, "Allura, it could be hours before it stops raining…"

She shudders and gasps as the blanket rubs across her sensitive nipples. Pulling her to him, he yanks the blanket back, exposing her breasts. She watches him curiously as he leans down, takes a nipple into his mouth then begins sucking on it. Allura gasps then moans as the milk shoots into his mouth. He pulls away to smile up at her, "I see what our daughter likes about this…" then leans down and pulls the nipple back into his mouth. Allura lets go of the blanket, letting it drop to the ground as she threads her fingers into his hair.

Releasing her nipple again to stand upright again, he sighs, "We need to get more comfortable I think…"

Leaving her to spread out the blanket she dropped, Keith guides her over then directs her to lie down on top of it. A sexy smile slips across his face as he lies on top of her, his mouth immediately latching onto the other nipple, releasing the pressure of the milk. Allura moans softly as she holds onto his shoulders. Several minutes later, Keith rises above her and kisses her, his tongue sliding gently across her lips until she opens them. He kisses her for several minutes, exploring her mouth with his tongue and teasing her tongue into playing with his.

As she whimpers with pleasure, Keith comes up for air and studies her closely. He lets his body rest fully upon her, letting her feel his hardness against her groin. Staring into her eyes, he finally smiles as he asks, "Do you want to be my wife, Allura?"

Eyes growing wide with happiness, she looks into his dark eyes as she whispers, "Yes…"

He kisses her again then sits up beside her. Unbuttoning her pants, Keith pulls them down her legs, stopping long enough to pull her boots off before finishing sliding them off. Her underwear quickly follows the pants then he stares at her body appreciatively, causing her to shiver before rising to quickly remove his own clothing.

Lowering himself back to the blanket, he lies back down on top of her then begins kissing her again, his hand coming up to caress her breast. Kissing his way across her cheek then along her jaw line, Keith kisses the side of her neck, making her shudder as he moves to the sensitive spot below her ear.

Smiling to himself, he shifts down and begins suckling her breast again, grazing the sensitive bud with his teeth then teases it with his tongue as his fingers being working on her other breast. Allura whimpers at the pleasure-pain and pulls on his hair.

Pausing to look up at her, he instructs, "Easy love…" then leans back down, kissing his way down her stomach as his fingers open her folds to play with her clit. Sliding down, he pushes a finger into her and Allura bucks her hips up at him, groaning. Withdrawing his hand, Keith kisses his way back up her chest then kisses her lips as he reaches between them to guide himself into her. Both groan at the entry. Keith begins to thrust while demanding, "Wrap your legs around me…"

Allura does as commanded then begins moving her hips along with him, meeting his thrusts, causing him to groan even more. As he gets closer to the brink, he lowers his head to take her nipple back into his mouth. The mewling sounds escaping his wife makes him move faster. The combination causes Allura to climax, her legs tightening around his hips as she cries out her pleasure. Sitting up on his knees, Keith grabs her hips, thrusting himself deeply into her until he finally comes with a groan then falls back over her, his face coming to a rest near her throat.

As the world comes back to him, he lifts his head to kiss her. Withdrawing from her body, Keith shifts to his side, pulling her along until he is on his back with her lying across his chest. He pulls the extra blanket around them then kisses her forehead as he inquires, "Are you all right?"

Opening her eyes, Allura lifts her head to look up at him, a sleepy smile on her face as she answers, "Yes." Lying back down, she closes her eyes and relaxes in his arms, falling asleep again.

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Awakening sometime later to discover she is alone under the blanket, Allura sits up to find her husband dressed and standing against the wall near the entry to the cave, watching the rain. She rises slowly, wrapping the blanket around herself as she moves toward him. He looks back at her when he finally hears her approach and smiles, "Have a nice nap?"

Nodding as she finishes walking up to him, she adds, "I missed you."

Pulling her against him, Keith kisses her forehead as Allura shivers in his arms. Sighing, he pushes her away for a moment, pulls her arms apart to open the blanket then tugs her against him again, sharing his body heat with her. Her arms wrap around his back, enclosing them both in the blanket. As Allura rubs her cheek against his chest, Keith runs his hands along her back. Feeling a slight shiver go through her again, he whispers in her ear, "It would probably help if you got dressed."

Sighing against his chest as his heat warms her, Allura gasps as his hand suddenly moves down, cupping her bottom as he pulls her tight against his groin. His tone turns seductive as he murmurs, "Then again there are some advantages to your current state of undress," as his lips move along her neck.

Allura tilts her head to the side to give him better access to her neck as she digs her fingers into his back and whimpers. Groaning in the back of his throat, Keith reaches between them to unzip his jeans. He pulls himself out and lifts her, pushing himself into Allura as she wraps her legs around his waist. Turning them around so her back rests against the cave wall, he begins thrusting. Allura releases her hold on the blanket to hang onto his shoulders while moaning. His mouth teases her nipple as his hands squeeze her buttocks. Moving her hands from his shoulders to his head, Allura forces his face up and their lips meet. He groans against her mouth, his fingers tightening their grip on her bottom as he increases the pace of his thrusts. Reaching climax, Allura throws back her head while crying out his name. Keith gasps as he feels her body tighten around him in her climax, causing him to join her. Resting his face against her neck and breathing heavily, it takes him a few moments to recover before he turns them back around and lowers Allura back to the ground.

Pulling away, Allura bends down to pick up the blanket, wrapping it around herself again before leaning into him once more. Keith groans miserably at the feel of her pert nipples against his chest, "Sweetheart, that is what got us into trouble to begin with," he kisses her forehead, "Please, go get dressed," pushing her gently away from him as his communicator rings. He pulls it off his belt, "Kogane."

"Keith, it's Lance, this weather isn't going to let up tonight I'm afraid. Do you want us to come get you?"

Watching his wife walk over to her clothing, his breath hitches in his chest as she drops the blanket then bends over to pick up her underwear. Hardening, Keith stifles another groan and turns away from her, looking back outside at the rain, "I suppose. Send Black out to pick up Allura. I'll ride the horse back in. Keith out." Deciding to torture himself, he turns back and watches his wife slowly dress, '_I'm going to need the cold shower…'_

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Returning to the castle almost an hour later, Keith leaves his horse with the stable lad then makes his way to his room. After a long hot shower, he dresses in his pajama bottoms then throws on his robe before leaving his room. Moving quickly down the hall, he enters Allura's room to find her asleep in the rocking chair. She has Adrienne in her arms, with a pillow under her as she feeds. Keith smiles at the picture they make as he walks over to the chair. Lifting his sleeping daughter away from Allura, he pats her back as she fusses sleepily while taking her into the nursery. Returning to the room, he looks Allura over to find her hair still damp. Obviously, she had showered and changed into her nightgown before feeding the baby.

He lifts her from the chair and smiles as she awakens, saying his name sleepily. Setting her on her feet when they near the bed, he begins kissing her awake. Allura's sleepy, sapphire eyes meet his as he ends the kiss to study her eyes. He pulls away briefly to take off his robe, throwing it on the end of the bed and quickly steps out of his pajama bottoms. Turning back to his wife, he finds her studying him, her eyes moving down his body. Smiling, he runs his hands up her arms, causing her to shiver. Keith pushes the nightgown off her shoulders, letting it pool the on floor. He molds his body to hers as his lips find hers. Allura whimpers as his hands move along her body, caressing her before he picks her up and places her on the bed so she is turned away from him. Keith lies down behind her and pulls the blankets up over them before turning off the light.

Spooning her, Keith wraps his arms around her as his lips find her neck, nuzzling it. Allura pushes her head more into the pillow to give him better access. Next, she wiggles her butt against his hardening groin, causing him to groan, "Tease…"

Allura laughs quietly but the laugh soon turns into a soft moan as she feels Keith pushing into her from behind while his hands move to her breasts and starts kneading them. Sighing out his name, she moves with him, reaching behind with a hand to caress his hip. Keith nips her neck once more as he moves a hand between her legs to play with her clit, causing Allura to gasp with pleasure. He continues to tease her as he thrusts within her until she stiffens with climax several minutes later. Keith groans pleasurably as her vaginal muscles squeeze him and after one more thrust, releases within her.

Keeping their bodies joined, Keith holds his wife tight to him, his hand resting against her stomach as he tries to calm his breathing. Allura moves her hand to grasp his, intertwining their fingers. As sleep takes her, she sighs contently and whispers, "I love you…" as her eyelids flutter shut.

Tightening his hold on her, Keith kisses her neck once more before closing his eyes and joining Allura in sleep.

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Allura awakens the next morning, overjoyed to feel Keith's arms still around her. She listens carefully and decides by his breathing that he must still be asleep. Lying still, she inhales his scent as she enjoys the feeling of his chest against her back, his legs behind hers and the way the hairs on the back of her neck tickle as he breathes out.

A few minutes later, she grimaces when she hears crying coming from the nursery. Beginning to move out of Keith's embrace, she feels his arms tighten as he kisses her neck, "I'll get her, stay in bed."

She appreciatively watches Keith walks across the room in the nude, enter the nursery and walk back to the bed while trying to calm down their crying daughter. Allura sits up in bed as he hands her Adrienne and shifts her into position. Silence fills the air at once as she starts suckling.

Chuckling as he lies beside them in the bed, Keith says, "Demanding little thing, isn't she?"

Allura smiles down at him as he wraps an arm around her waist then wiggles when he kisses her side, "Stop that…it tickles."

Smiling wickedly at her, Keith nuzzles her side once more, causing her to wiggle again. He finally stops when Adrienne detaches and starts fussing. Sitting up, he kisses his daughter, "All right, I'll leave your mother alone while she feeds you." Allura laughs at him as Adrienne reattaches and begins suckling once more. Shaking his head at his daughter, he looks back into his wife's eyes, "She gets as upset as Hunk does when you interrupt his meal," causing her to laugh once more.

Leaning forward, he kisses Allura then lies back down on the pillow. He becomes quiet as he watches her feed their daughter and he once again moves his hand to her stomach, caressing it. Allura looks down at him and frowns at the serious look on his face, "Is something wrong?"

Moving his gaze from her stomach, he smiles at her, "No, just thinking…" He sits back up, leans over, kissing her cheek once more then gets out of bed, throwing on his pajama bottoms and robe. He stops and smiles at her once more, "I better get moving. I'll see you later," then walks out of the room.

She stares at the closing door, confused by his abrupt departure. Allura finally turns her attention back to Adrienne as the little princess detaches and begins fussing once more. Shifting her to the other breast, the queen begins humming a song to her as Adrienne continues to feed.

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Walking down the hall after her morning meeting with Coran, Allura stops when she sees maids carrying boxes and men carrying furniture into her bedroom. She follows them into her room and spots Nanny instructing the men where to put the dresser. Walking up to her governess, she asks, "What's this?"

Nanny smiles at her, "His Majesty asked us to move his things into this room today."

Smiling brightly at the older woman, Allura turns around and leaves the room. She walks down the hall to Keith's study, pausing to knock on the door. Once she hears his voice calling out "Enter," she walks in and smiles at her husband. He smiles back at her as she walks around his desk. Keith pushes back as she sits down in his lap, wrapping her arms around him.

Keith kisses her then nuzzles her neck, "To what do I owe this pleasure?"

Pulling away to smile fondly at him, she replies, "I found I'm going to have a roommate…"

His eyes dance with humor as he smiles at her, "Hope you don't mind someone who occasionally snores."

Laughing, Allura leans up to kiss him again, "I think I can handle it." She moves her hand along his chest, caressing him. Keith reaches up to grab her hand, stopping her, "We need to talk first, Allura."

Confused, Allura stares at him, her eyes full of hurt as she asks, "Did I do something wrong?"

Shaking his head, Keith moves his hand to her belly, caressing it. He leans toward her, softly kisses her again then pulls back, sighing, "I don't know how to go about this one, so I'm going to plunge in head first." He gazes into her eyes, "We need to discuss what we want out of this marriage."

Allura continues to look at Keith confused, until he continues, "Like children… How many do you want to have?"

Looking away from him for a moment as she thinks over the question, her eyes are serious as she faces him again to answer, "As many as you are willing to give me, Keith. How many do you want?"

Smiling at her, he shrugs as he replies, "Well, more than one." He shifts her in his arms so that she rests against him once more. Hugging her tightly to him, he says, "I spoke to Dr. Gorma this morning. You passed your 6-week physical with flying colors. I asked him how long we should wait for more children." Keith pulls back enough to meet her gaze again, "He said we would be better off to let your body heal a year before impregnating you again. But if you were to get pregnant, since you had no problems with the first pregnancy, you should be fine if you were pregnant now."

Nodding slowly as she stares up at him, Allura asks, "Where are you going with this, Keith?"

Looking down at her stomach, he caresses it once more as he answers, "We've been having unprotected sex, Allura. You could be pregnant again even now. My question to you is do you want to wait, make sure you aren't pregnant and start birth control or do you want to follow the fates where they lead us and possibly get pregnant again so soon after Adrienne?"

Her breath catches at the intensity of his gaze even as his hand continues to move over her stomach. Smiling at him, she answers, "Keith, I love you and want to do whatever will make you happy. If that includes following the fates and getting pregnant again today, I will do it."

Keith smiles happily at her, "I can't help it…the thought that another child could be growing within you excites me."

Allura leans forward to gaze into his eyes then meets his lips for another kiss. She caresses his cheek, "That solves that question then, we follow the fates where they lead us, my love." Curling back into his arms, she sighs as she caresses his chest. She closes her eyes as she whispers, "Will you ever love me, Keith?"

She listens to the sound of his heartbeat increase as his arms tighten around her. Finally, he speaks in a low tone, "What makes you think I don't?"

Shifting in his arms, Allura gazes into his eyes uncertainly, "Keith?"

Raising a hand to caress her cheek, he murmurs, "What does this tell you?" and leans in to kiss her. She sighs as Keith moves his lips tenderly across hers then lightly sucks on her lower lip before his tongue gently slips between her lips. Tears run down Allura's cheeks as he pulls back from her to wipe the tears from her face with his fingers. The most brilliant smile Keith has ever seen crosses Allura's face before she wraps her arms around him, hugging him close to her.

He breathes in her scent and sighs as he holds his wife tightly, "I love you Allura. You are my life and the very air I breathe."

Pulling back to meet his gaze, Allura smiles then leans forward until their lips find each other once more.


	17. Chapter 17

Alas, we have arrived at the end. I know the question on everyone's mind is when will Origins 2 come out and the answer I have for you is, I don't know. I had started it shortly after finishing writing Origins, have about 35 pages of various scenes completed, but am afraid burnout got the better of me. Sadly, editing/revising is not something I enjoy and Origins was a long story to edit and post. So, when I was having a hard time writing the sequel, I found I had to walk away from Origins for a while. That and not only am I still working on my certification, I had a story idea come to me that has nothing to do with Voltron or any other fanfiction. This will be a story wholly my own and it got me excited about writing again. So most nights I spend time studying and try to fit in at least a little bit of time writing before calling it a night. Never fear, I will write Origins 2 and have ideas outlined for Origins 3, just I won't get them done as fast as I know the fans want to see them.

Until next time,

Mertz

I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.

Heartache & Desperation: Chapter 17

Over the next month, everyone notices the changes in Keith and Allura, as smiles and laughter seem to follow them wherever they go. More than once, they have been caught kissing rather intensely in spots that are normally not well travelled, causing a lot of teasing by members of the Force.

Holding hands as they walk down the hall together for a meeting in the advisor's office, Keith smiles at his wife, "Come on Allura…even as a little girl, you never danced along the hallways?"

Smiling back at her husband, Allura shakes her head as she answers, "No, decorum dictated that a proper princess would never be caught dancing, running or jump roping down the hallways of the castle. If Nanny would have caught me…" she shudders, "I don't want to think about the punishment."

Stopping them, mischievousness shines in Keith's eyes as he suggests, "How about a queen?" As Allura arches an eyebrow at him, Keith pulls her into his arms then begins waltzing them down the hallway, making her laugh.

Stepping out of his office, Coran gapes at the sight in front of him as the king and queen dance along the hallway. As they get closer to him, he puffs up, "Really, your Majesties!"

Glancing at the older man, Keith spins Allura a final time, stops in front of him, then dips her back and kisses her on the lips. The smile on her face could brighten a room as he pulls her back up to face the scarlet faced advisor. Wrapping an arm around his wife's waist, Keith raises an eyebrow at him, "Something wrong, Coran?"

Shaking his head as he stares flabbergasted at the pair in front of him, the advisor finally manages to mutter, "It just isn't done…"

Keith smiles at him, "Apparently it is…"

As the advisor continues to sputter, Keith laughs at him then pulls his wife back into his arms. He spins her around some more just as Lance and Michael turn into the hallway and spot them.

Staring open mouthed as the Commander of the Voltron Force and King of Arus continues to waltz with his wife in the hallway, Michael turns his gaze to find Coran covering his mouth to stop his sputtering. Lance, however, starts laughing at the sight. Michael turns his incredulous gaze to the lieutenant, "Has Keith always been like that?"

Wiping the humorous tears from his eyes as he looks away from his best friends, Lance finally answers, "No, I've never seen him act like that…"

Michael turns his gaze back to the happy couple as Keith once again dips a laughing Allura, "Then why?"

Patting his teammate on the arm, Lance answers, "Love…love makes a man do some very funny things. I should know," then continues his way on down the hallway.

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The following morning, Keith looks over at his friend during breakfast, "Is everything ready for today, Lance?"

Looking up from his breakfast, the lieutenant swallows his sip of coffee then nods, "As requested."

Allura looks away from her plate to complain to her husband, "I still don't know why Adrienne and I can't just ride with you in Black lion to the festival."

Leaning over, a smile slips across Keith's face before he kisses her. Pulling back, he answers, "Because I need to make sure security is in place before I allow my wife and child anywhere near that festival." When she opens her mouth to argue some more, he reaches out to touch her cheek, "Humor me, will you please, Allura?"

Gazing into his eyes as he smiles at her, Allura finally acquiesces, "Fine, I ride with Coran and Christine in the carriage as planned. Just don't expect me to be happy about it when I'd rather be with you."

Christine smiles at the couple as Keith kisses his wife once more before looking over at her own husband, who winks at her. Lance looks up at the clock then interrupts the lovebirds, "Keith, we better get a move on…"

Sighing, he releases his wife as he stands, "Let's go." Keith leans down to kiss Allura on the lips once more, "See you in about an hour," then strides out of the room with the rest of the Force.

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Sighing as she watches the countryside go by, Allura finally settles back into her seat as the carriage rumbles along the country road to the village that is hosting a festival in honor of the Voltron Force. When she had heard about the festival, she had to argue with Keith for quite a while before he agreed to allow her to bring their daughter along. He didn't like Adrienne out in the public, where he would have a harder time protecting both her and Allura. She looks across the carriage as Adrienne gurgles at Christine making the other woman laugh at her.

Glancing out the window, she notes the armed guards surrounding the carriage as they move along and sighs as she thinks, _'Security doesn't seem to be an issue…' _Twenty minutes later, they enter the village. Allura looks out the windows to smile and wave at the villagers as they pass through the decorated town square. When they do not stop, she looks at her advisor to ask, "Coran, why aren't we stopping?"

The older man smiles at her as he answers, "His Majesty requested we meet him at a specific location. The carriage will drop us off there." Still curious at the incomplete answer, Allura nods anyway then goes back to waving at her people.

When the carriage pulls to a stop, Allura waits impatiently for Coran to step down before he turns back to assist her. Once on the ground, she turns away as he turns to assist Christine to look at the building they are standing in front of. Confused, she looks back at her advisor, "What are we doing at the church?"

Holding the princess close as she exits the carriage, Christine smiles at her then hands her the baby, "This, my dear, is your wedding day…"

Allura's eyes widen in shock as she stares at the two of them, "My wedding day?"

Taking her arm, Christine guides a thoroughly confused Allura into the building then into an antechamber, where Nanny is waiting for her. Hanging on a hook behind the governess, is the most beautiful dress Allura has ever seen. She steps forward and touches the gown then turns back to the women to demand, "What's going on?"

Smiling at her, Christine explains, "Keith wanted it to be a surprise for you. He wanted to have the ceremony re-preformed and leave both of you with happier memories."

Nanny wipes tears from her eyes as Allura once again looks back to look at the dress, tears beginning to fall down her cheeks. She turns back to Christine and hugs her, pulling back when Adrienne fusses at them. Christine takes the princess from her, "This little girl will go to her daddy for now, so you can get ready."

Smiling at her friend as Nanny gestures for the queen to sit down at the vanity, Christine finally leaves the room. She walks down the hall with Adrienne and knocks on another door, entering when bidden. Keith and Lance look up as she walks in the door. She hands the baby to Keith as she informs him, "Yes, she was surprised and extremely happy."

Delighted by the news, Keith turns away from her, bouncing Adrienne to make her giggle. Christine smiles as her husband pulls her into his arms, hugging her. She nuzzles her face against his chest and sighs before looking back up at him, "Too bad Sven and Romelle couldn't come."

Lance leans down and kisses her, "Well, can't blame them when the doctor recommended they don't travel until Romelle is past the first trimester. Sven is a nervous wreck." Christine nods, glances at the time, and pulls away, "I better go help Nanny…see you in a bit," then turns and walks out of the room.

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Standing at the front of the church, Keith watches Coran lead Allura to him as the organ music plays. She looks beautiful in an ivory embroidered, sleeveless dress. The bodice fits her form perfectly, pushing her breasts up slightly. Cinching at the waist, the base of the gown flows to the ground, hiding her feet. The top and sides of her hair are held back with a tiara, with the rest of her hair flowing down her back in waves. He looks on astounded by the radiance on her face as she walks to him, her sapphire eyes meeting his as she finishes approaching.

Keeping her eyes on Keith's face as she walks to him, Allura feels overwhelmed by the look of love in his eyes and the smile on his face as he takes in her appearance before his eyes meet hers. She stops in front of Keith and smiles at him as he studies her face before returning his gaze to hers. He takes her hand, "You are beyond beautiful, my love," and turns to walk her to the priest performing the ceremony.

Allura continues to stare into his eyes during the ceremony as Keith promptly repeats his vows to love, honor and cherish her throughout the rest of their days. She finally looks down as he places the most beautiful ring she has ever seen on her finger as a symbol of his love. Solid gold, intricate designs in the metal hold a diamond in the middle, which glistens with the light from the windows. Tears filling Allura's eyes, she looks back up at Keith as he smiles at her then lifts her hand, kissing it.

As the priest finishes the ceremony, Keith turns back to his wife as he is finally asked to kiss his bride. Smiling brightly, he wraps his arms around her and kisses her tenderly to the applause of the Force, Coran, Nanny and Christine. As his lips part from hers, he whispers, "I love you," only loud enough for her to hear.

Happiness filling her, Allura wraps her arms around him, hugging him tightly to her. Pushing her face into his neck, she whispers back, "I love you too." Keith tightens his hold on her, places a kiss on her neck then pulls back. They walk toward their friends, exchanging hugs while being congratulated. Feeling Keith's arm securely around her waist, Allura shares a smile with Christine. The other woman smiles back at her as she leans into her own husband, enjoying the arm that snakes around her own waist to hold her close to him.

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After the ceremony, the group changes back into commoner's clothing then exits the church. Moving around the festival in small groups, they admire the sideshows and take in the fares of the various vendors. Keith walks around with one arm around Allura's waist while carrying Adrienne in the other.

Standing behind one of the booths, Beth watches Keith as he lowers his smiling face toward Allura and kisses her on the lips tenderly before turning to greet one of the villagers. She continues to watch them for quite some time and suddenly starts when she hears a voice behind her, "You wouldn't be thinking of causing a scene would you?"

Beth turns around to find Michael studying her closely. She steps back from him, "No I wasn't…"

Narrowing his eyes at her, Michael snorts derisively, "A chuisle, now considering what happened during your last trip to the castle, why don't I believe you?"

Shaking her head at him, Beth turns back to study the king and queen once more. The affection between the couple continues to be obvious as they move around the festival. She speaks quietly, "He loves her, doesn't he?"

Taking a step closer to Beth so he can smell her, Michael traces a finger down along her arm, causing her to gasp and turn back toward him as he mentally questions, '_Why has this woman captivated me since I first met her?'_ He smiles at her then nods back to the couple, "Yes, he does…does that bother you?"

Beth gets lost in his green eyes as his fingers trace back up her arm causing her to shiver. Suddenly, the couple walking around the festival holds no interest for her. Sighing deeply, she honestly answers, "No…not anymore…"

Arching an eyebrow at her in disbelief, Michael smiles sardonically, "Why not anymore?"

Turning away from him again, she breathes deeply as her gaze once again falls on the couple, "Because I can see he is happy. I was wrong…they belong together." She stops breathing as she feels Michael lean against her, his chest to her back as he breathes into her ear, "And what would make you happy, darlin?"

Beth forces herself to start breathing again as every nerve in her body hums when Michael moves his fingers along her arm once more. She turns her head to find his lips close to her own. She takes another deep breath and licks her lip nervously, causing Michael to groan and dip his head toward her, closing the gap between them and kissing her soundly. Beth whimpers as she feels his arms encircle her waist and the thought of, '_Kisses from Keith never felt like this.._.' goes through her mind in lightning fast speed before her mind goes blank as she becomes fully engrossed in the kiss.

Turning down another avenue, Keith smiles at a remark his wife has made then looks up and is startled by the view in front of him. He clears his throat, causing Allura to look up at him, "What's wrong, Keith?"

He points across the venue to where Michael continues kissing Beth. Allura looks over and her eyes widen in shock as she turns back to her husband, she questions, "Is that Beth with Michael?"

Smiling down at her, he answers, "I guess it is…"

Allura smiles as she watches Beth turn into Michael's arms and continue kissing him, "You might have to lift your ban on her ability to enter the castle." She turns to see Keith gazing into her eyes as he asks, "It wouldn't bother you, Allura, if Beth was in the castle?"

She shakes her head at him, "No, I know you love me." A mischievous smile lifts her lips as she adds, "Besides, I don't think it would be you Beth would be interested in seeing at the castle," finishing, she lifts an eyebrow at him.

Laughter bursts out of him as Keith looks back over to see Michael hugging Beth. Their gazes meet and Keith nods and waves at the private in a silent message of acceptance before wrapping his arm back around Allura and guiding her away.

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An hour later, Keith begins guiding Allura back toward the carriage, their daughter asleep in her arms. He smiles down on his wife and daughter as another villager stops them to congratulate them on their marriage and to admire the sleeping princess.

Keith smiles his thanks and is about to continue walking when he notices a shadow crossing the sun. He looks up and instantly his body goes into alert as he swears. Allura looks up at him as he grabs his comm. unit from his belt to order, "Get moving to the lions everybody! Lotor has decided to pay us a visit."

He takes Adrienne from his wife and begins running for Black lion with Allura right behind him. They climb into the lion and Allura pulls out the spare seat and straps herself in. Keith opens a compartment and pulls out a baby harness. He hands it to her saying, "I had hoped to never need this. Strap it on quick!" Allura gets the harness in place then Keith hands her Adrienne. She straps the baby to her chest and watches Keith as he climbs into the pilot seat. His expression is taut with dread as he says, "Hang on tight, Allura…" then puts the key into the lion and Black lion stands up, roaring.

Wrapping her arms tightly around Adrienne, Allura watches as Keith takes off into the air and begins combat with the fighter ships that have come out of Lotor's command ship. Soon all five lions are engaged in combat and Lance can be heard swearing over the comm. unit, "Damn Lotor! He has one hell of a sense of timing."

Looking into the video unit, Keith can see Christine's frightened face in behind Lance. He glances back at Allura then turns back to the unit as he grimaces, "I don't think it was a lucky accident, Lance…I am willing to bet he knew we would all be down there."

The lieutenant looks back at him wide-eyed, "You better be extra careful, Keith…"

Nodding back to him, Keith replies, "Same to you buddy…"

He swears a moment later as a coffin leaves the command ship, "Get ready everyone! They just released a robeast."

The robeast breaks out of the coffin and grows in size until it is as tall as Voltron. Lasers shoot out of its eyes at the lions, causing Keith to pull away while commanding, "Evasive maneuvers!"

All five lions separate and begin attacking the robeast, with Pidge digging Green's teeth into the beast's arm as Hunk fires several proton missiles at its head. Keith swears as he again evades the lasers and fires missiles at the robeast, "I think we need to form Voltron and take care of this thing!"

He begins flying up in formation then screams as a laser finally hits Black lion. Allura looks on in terror as Keith shakes from the electricity she can see going through his body. Confused, she looks around and sees an aura around her and Adrienne, protecting them from the blast. Allura screams his name as Keith's body finally goes limp and he releases the controls.

Black lion starts falling toward the ground with Lance yelling across the comm. unit, "Pull up Keith! For God's sake, pull up!" Allura quickly undoes the shoulder straps, and with Adrienne still strapped to her chest, grasps the controls to pull the lion up out of its dive just before it would hit the ground. She sits in Keith's lap and continues to work the controls, pulling Black lion up into the sky again, "Lance! Keith is unconscious!"

She fires several missiles at the robeast before flying upward again, "Let's form Voltron, quick!"

As she goes through the sequence of forming Voltron, she looks behind her to see Keith's eyes are still closed. She leans back and is relieved to hear his breathing. She can see Lance's face on the video comm. as he nods at her, "You are in charge Allura, call out the commands!"

Yanking on the controls, she moves Voltron to evade several missile shots then yells, "Lion head attack!" She presses the necessary buttons and holds Adrienne close to her as she watches the lion heads race toward the robeast and then go through it.

After they return, she calls out, "Form blazing sword!" and watches the sword form between Green and Red lions. Allura runs Voltron at the robeast and slices it in half. Pulling back, she flies Voltron away from the robeast as it explodes and heads toward Lotor's command ship, firing several missiles at it.

As the missiles hit and the Drule command ship heads back toward space, she can hear Lance say, "Let him go Allura. How's Keith?"

Looking back, Allura is frightened to find her husband still unconscious. She reports, "He's still out, Lance!" and hits the buttons to disengage Voltron. She flies Black lion back to the front of the castle and lays it down as personnel from MedTech race toward the lion.

xxxxxxxxxx

Over forty minutes later, Allura paces the waiting room of MedTech, awaiting Dr. Gorma to come out and tell her Keith's status. Lance sits next to Christine in the chairs, comforting her. The whole experience had been a frightening one for her and she still was upset. Allura looks up as Hunk entertains Adrienne, getting her to giggle. Glancing back at the exam room doors, she wrings her hands together and continues pacing.

Watching her closely, Michael can't help asking, "I don't understand, Allura. How is it that that laser affected Keith but not you? If it was electricity, then you and Adrienne should have been affected as well."

Stopping, Allura looks flummoxed at the group in front of her, "I don't understand it myself, Michael. All I know is there was this light around us, protecting Adrienne and I from the blast."

Suddenly, the room brightens as King Alfor's ghost appears before the waiting group, "My daughter…it was I that protected you." He steps toward Allura and touches her forehead, causing many images to go through her mind. When finished, he commands, "Protect your family, my daughter," and disappears.

Michael sits with his mouth wide open as Lance raises an eyebrow at her. His tone is sarcastic as he says, "Would have been nice of him to protect Keith as well." Shaking her head at the memory of the images, Allura walks over to Lance and Christine and sits down, stunned.

xxxxxxxxxx

A short time later, Dr. Gorma walks out of the exam room and moves down the hall to the waiting room. Allura stands up to face him as he smiles, "Majesty, the king will be fine. Thankfully, the electricity has not left any permanent damage. He has finally come to and is asking for you."

Relief filling her, Allura quickly moves away from the group without waiting for any more information. She walks into Keith's room to find him lying in the bed as if asleep. He opens his eyes as she carefully moves next to him and leans down to kiss him. She keeps her tone quiet as she inquires, "How do you feel?"

Keith clears his throat as he reaches up with his hand to caress her cheek, "Tired…but fine." He studies her eyes, "Why didn't the blast affect you?"

Smiling at him, she answers, "My father protected Adrienne and I."

Closing his eyes tiredly, Keith breathes out a sigh, "Remind me to go down to your father's tomb and thank him when they release me."

Allura continues to smile at him and moves her hand to caress his cheek, "He didn't want his grandchildren harmed."

Nodding absently, Keith's eyes fly back open suddenly as he demands, "Children?"

Sitting up, she takes his hand, putting it on her stomach, "He showed me…"

Smiling happily, Keith sits up in bed and hugs his wife to him. Allura rests her face against his neck. Sighing deeply, she thinks, '_If the vision my father showed me was correct, life is going to get really interesting…' _The image of a pair of identical blonde-headed little boys with their father's dark eyes running down the halls of the castle following their ebony haired, sapphire eyed sister as she dances ahead of them, races through her mind once more.


End file.
